My female boss will stop me in the middle of work just to stare in my eyes and drone on and on about her personal business. How do I stop her?

[Anonymous]

She does this type of thing to everyone. I think she does it cause she’s the boss and we basically have to listen to her stories and stand there as she stares in our eyes and passionately rambles about whatever little thing is on her mind. She’s actually an acceptable person aside from this for the most part. She lacks a lot of horrible traits most bosses have such as micromanaging, talking in a bossy, demanding rude condescending tone all the time, being two faced and only nice when she wants something from you, being overly strict about rules etc. but I dont see why I need to hear about her personal family drama in the middle of trying to complete work? I am a good listener naturally and an overactive listener (google it) and let people talk when they talk to me knelt constantly butt in with my own agenda. In her case I don’t even think her behavior is that personal because I’ve seen that she has the same demeanor with everyone. But i feel like I need to develop a personality to where I’m cold and businesslike all the time to avoid being steamrolled by others at work.

[MaazHussain]

It's understandable that you find your boss's behavior of interrupting your work to talk about her personal business disruptive and frustrating. While she may not be doing it with the intention of being rude, it's important to establish boundaries to ensure that you can focus on your work and meet your deadlines.

One way to do this is to politely but firmly communicate to your boss that you are on a deadline or have work that needs to be completed. For example, you could say, "I'm sorry to interrupt, but I'm on a tight deadline and I really need to focus on this task right now. Can we discuss this later, perhaps during our next scheduled meeting?"

You could also try redirecting the conversation back to work-related topics. For example, if your boss starts talking about her personal life, you could say, "That sounds like a lot to deal with. In terms of work, is there anything I can help you with right now?"

If you find that these strategies are not working, it may be necessary to have a more direct conversation with your boss about the impact that her behavior is having on your ability to work effectively. Try to approach the conversation from a place of mutual respect, and be clear about your need to focus on your job duties. It may also be helpful to offer potential solutions, such as scheduling regular check-ins to discuss non-work-related topics.

In any case, it's important to remember that setting boundaries is a normal and healthy part of any professional relationship, and it's okay to prioritize your work and your own mental health.

[Asker]

Thank you. I felt like I was her therapist last time she pulled me aside

[BarryLiverstone]

Don’t try and stop her. Instead relax and engage in conversation. Once a few minutes have passed if you wanna get back to work ask her a business question