Female Co-Worker Showing Interest, But Not Sure need help?

[KazDillinger]

So this girl at work I think likes me, so at work I noticed every once in a while she always ask me for help on instant messager at work to help her work the printer or scan something or asking questions about a file in the system, sometimes the answer is clear and easy to find in the system, so I would and think nothing of it she's being lazy, she's been doing this for a while now off and on and she only asks me no one else. So, I started to wonder I noticed she takes the long way to get to her desk all the time caught her looking once and she looked away quickly, whenever she passes by my desk, but when I'm in break room and she sees me in there she'll take the short quick way back to her desk using the door nearest to her side of the office and desk. And I started noticing when I go to my bosses office down near her side of the office she'll take quick stares at me walking down and when I look her way she looks down. Then, when I need to talk to her she can't look me in the eye weird right? Then while she's handing me something she's looking down and not at me. So, yesterday she comes into work and she takes the long way to pass by my desk and she's dressed up & walked into the break room opened the fridge and didn't get anything out or put anything in, I noticed it. She's started to dress up more, I dunno if it's just to get my attention. Today, she saw me standing in hallway staircase, and we laughed and smiled at each other as we almost bumped each other and she was acting like she was about to call someone on her phone, then maybe 10 seconds she comes back and asks about a file I was working on for her the day before, but I was already working on it and she knew that as I told her through the instant messenger. We are talking, she's staring directly into my eyes none stop and smiling as I talk which I started to feel that attraction and I started smiling as well as we talked, but she leaves & doesn't call anyone, she only came out to see me, what's going on?

[PrettyPriya]

It is entirely possible she has a thing for you or those are signals. It is also entirely possible that is all in your head and what you want to think. You might have caught her a couple times looking and now thinks she does it all the time. She might also genuinely being doing that.

I would say the biggest indicator is the smiling when you are having a conversation. That is a low-key way of flirting. So, the question is what are you going to do about it? If she is trying to get your attention, it is likely that she is not the type of person to make the first move.

I would really think long and hard about if it is worth getting into a relationship with a coworker. At their best, those relationships are a work distraction between two people. At their worst, they are a distraction for everyone. Just imagine a big fight or bad breakup and other coworkers taking sides and you being miserable because you have to see her, etc, etc.

This is why so many companies have policies against workplace romances.

[KazDillinger]

Yes, but before that she absolutely couldn't look me in the eye and even when handing me something she would be looking down the entire time and seems nervous with a really low voice which I thought she hated me but other times she's leaving at a distance staring directly at me obvious. Then I was sitting on the staircase and she was walking up looking at phone and she got so close I thought she was going to fall on me I'm nervous and ready to catch her and I know she saw me as she walked pass me on the way down the stairs. But she looked up at the last minute and said oh I'm sorry I almost ran into you very low almost seductive voice and that's what had me thinking that this whole time what if scenario. I just never thought it was a possibility until now.

[PrettyPriya]

Well, it is entirely possible she is doing this to get your attention. Like I mentioned though, those types of people that keep trying and trying are also the same types of people that do it because they will not make a first move. They will keep that up until you do.

[KazDillinger]

Thank you, I'll weigh my options carefully.

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

I second everything @PrettyPriya said and I add to be careful about "dating where you eat". If something bad happens or this coworker and you actually get together and then break up there could be serious conseguences for you.

Here in Europe we are a bit more liberal about this kind of thing, but speaking from personal experience I did the mistake of dating the person that was technically my superior, and it didn't end well.

[PrettyPriya]

Good way of putting it, "dating where you eat".

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

@PrettyPriya thank you.
Although in some cases it can be also said "screwing where you eat".

[PrettyPriya]

@Sun_Kim-Ai That too. Either way, not something I suggest because of what you said about your personal experience. But hey, I do know some (very few) that made it work. Just not something I would risk when it comes to career.

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

@PrettyPriya exactly, balancing the business with the personal it's not easy.
In my case she "just" got bored so she sidelined me and had me tranferred, so it didn't go too bad. But I heard of people getting fired or made to quit by a vengeful ex, especially a boss.

[MrCommodore]

There is definitely some level of interest there, but not sure if it's romantic interest or platonic.

[In_Trance]

Don't fuck your coworkers. It never works out the way you think it will

[Anonymous]

Don't fuck your coworkers. It never works out the way you think it will Well said