I've got a crush on one of my female friends and recently we've began to hang out quite a lot. After a while things broke off between myself and the girl I was dating and my friend with the guy she was dating.
We now spend the time we would've spent with our dates together now and I'm starting to get mixed signals and be unsure. I feel like there is mutual interest, although I feel like she doesn't want to risk our friendship so keeps her walls high at times.
Last week she came over to my house to watch a movie. She seemed quite nervous and uncomfortable and remained right at the very edge of the bed, however showed interest in coming back to watch another movie soon.
Last night she came over to watch another film. At the start she sat on the corner the same as last time, however eventually she began to lay down and moved in a bit. It was a long movie with a break in the middle so there was lots of time. On multiple occasions we would touch, however I noticed that the touches were very prolonged, with her essentially holding my hand for quite a long time before letting go and grabbing what she intended to grab initially, and on another occasion I handed her a cup but she grabbed it at my hand and pretty much stroked my hand as she let go which piqued my interest.
As the movie went on I noticed she began to move closer and closer towards me on the bed and u could see her wanting to move her legs closer at times. We were effectively a fingers length from being face to face at one point before my phone rang and she moved back to the edge of the bed.
She said she'd like to come back in a few days and watch another movie, but I don't know what to do. I don't want to "make a move" in a sense because if I'm reading it wrong it'll make things awkward, so should I continue to let her develop to the point where I feel like it's a given she likes me? One friend has told me I should continue acting as is and give her the time to make her decision first
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It's understandable that you're feeling unsure about your friend's signals and don't want to risk damaging your friendship. It's important to communicate openly and honestly with her about your feelings and intentions, but it's also important to respect her boundaries and pace.
It's possible that your friend is interested in you but is hesitant to make a move because she values your friendship. It's also possible that she is just comfortable with physical touch and enjoys spending time with you.
One approach could be to continue spending time together and giving her the opportunity to get to know you better. You could also try to create opportunities for more intimate conversations and see if she opens up about her feelings.
Ultimately, it's up to you to decide what you're comfortable with and what you're looking for in a relationship. It's important to prioritize your own well-being and to communicate your boundaries clearly. If you're not comfortable with the situation or if you're looking for something more serious, it may be necessary to have an honest conversation with her about your intentions and see where she stands.
So she's not really big on touch, which is why I made a point of it. We went for lunch today and we kept bumping into eachother and our hand/arms touched quite a lot.
Anyway she seemed very present, legs touching mine, laughing at all my jokes, leaning in etc. When we left she touched me quite a few times. I've touched her hand a few times recently, however this time she pulled back straight away, I figured I must be mistaken, however a few mins later she got in a good mood and started touching me and flirting a bit. Then when she got home she started texting me non stop, the point of this is she never texts and when she does she takes hours ro reply, yet she texts me a lot now and replies within a minute or two
It sounds like there may be mutual interest between you and your friend. However, it's important to remember that everyone has their own boundaries and comfort levels when it comes to physical touch and intimacy. It's possible that she pulled back when you touched her hand because she was caught off guard or unsure, but then warmed up to the idea later on.
The fact that she's texting you more frequently and quickly could also be a good sign that she's interested in you. However, it's important to continue to communicate openly with her and discuss your feelings and intentions. Be respectful of her boundaries and give her space to make her own decisions.
It's okay to take things slow and not rush into anything. Enjoy spending time together and getting to know each other on a deeper level. If the feelings are mutual, things will likely progress naturally. Good luck!
So we were with friends this week and we were always together and there was lots of teasing and kind of just pressing into eachother or pushing eachother around.
I jokingly patted her shoulder at one point and she pulled away, but 10 seconds later she started rubbing my arm and teasing me.
She came by last night to watch another movie and she was more comfortable, but didn't move towards me this time. When I sat down our knees touched and I apologised and moved my leg away. She then jokingly threw a pillow at me and I pushed her over which annoyed her.
I asked why she seems so cold atm and she said she doesn't think my touches are friendly, which I found surprising seen as I've rubbed her back and thigh before and it was fine, but an accidental touch now she pulls away from, when she has began touching me a lot more.
I began jokingly flirting with her then for a while and she began sitting very close to me and we hugged before she left. I made a joke about her wanting to sleep with me and then I made a joke about id give her a kiss and when she got home I sent some more flirty texts.
Today she text and Said she's down to hang out tomorrow and will come over to watch another movie some night this week.
I just don't know what to do when she doesn't like being touched again, when its something she became comfortable with for a while.
It's normal to feel uncertain about the situation, especially when there are mixed signals and changes in behavior. It's important to have clear communication with your friend about boundaries and what is comfortable for both of you.
If your friend has expressed discomfort with your touches, it's important to respect her boundaries and avoid touching her in a way that makes her uncomfortable. It's possible that her comfort level has changed or that she wasn't comfortable with the way you touched her in that particular moment. It's important to have a conversation with her about what is and isn't okay in terms of physical contact.
It's also important to be respectful of your friend's feelings and not push her into anything she's not comfortable with. If she's giving mixed signals, it may be helpful to take a step back and give her space to sort out her feelings.
Ultimately, the most important thing is to prioritize your friendship and make sure that both of you are comfortable with any potential changes in the relationship. It may be helpful to have an open and honest conversation about your feelings and intentions to avoid misunderstandings and hurt feelings.
You can try saying something like, "Hey, I just wanted to check in and make sure we're on the same page about physical contact. I noticed that you seemed uncomfortable when I touched your shoulder the other day and I want to make sure that I'm not crossing any boundaries. Would you be willing to talk about what kind of physical contact is okay for you?"
It's important to approach the conversation in a non-judgmental and respectful way and to genuinely listen to her feelings and concerns. You can also share your own feelings and intentions in a clear and honest way.
For example, you can say something like, "I really value our friendship and I don't want to do anything that makes you uncomfortable. I enjoy spending time with you and I just wanted to clarify what kind of physical contact is and isn't okay so that we can both feel comfortable and respected."
Remember that clear communication and mutual respect are key to maintaining a healthy friendship and potentially taking things to the next level.
Or say this like, "I'm sorry if my actions the other day made you uncomfortable. I didn't mean to cross any boundaries or make you feel like my touches weren't friendly. I value our friendship and I want to make sure that we're both comfortable with any physical contact we have in the future. Would you be willing to talk about what kind of physical contact is okay for you?"
We went for lunch the other day and our legs began rubbing under the table and neither of us moved for quite some time, but i passed little remark.
She came over last night again and this time there was quite a bit of contact and instead of sitting on the bed we actually got under the covers together. We actually got pretty close before my cat came and slept in between us hahaha.
We got so close and had touched quite a bit to the point I was considering making a move, but I waited quite a while and she eventually became tired and cranky.
she's coming back again in a few days and I'm hoping things escalate another step or two so I can get a clear indication of what she wants. Because I was effectively rubbing her leg at one point last night and she just turned over to face me and moved in closer. Although I'm still seeing lots of signs of being nervous, such as I see her fidget with her fingers and be very stiff the closer we get
It sounds like there is definitely a physical attraction between you and your friend, but it's important to communicate openly and honestly with her about your intentions and boundaries. It's possible that she may be sending mixed signals because she's not sure what she wants, or because she's afraid of risking your friendship.
Before making a move, it's important to have a conversation with her about where you both stand and what you're looking for in a relationship. It's important to respect her boundaries and not pressure her into anything she's not comfortable with. If she's not interested in pursuing a romantic relationship, it's important to respect her decision and continue to value the friendship you have.
Remember that communication and respect are key in any relationship, whether it's romantic or platonic. All you should do is take things slow and make sure you're both on the same page before moving forward.
Use your words. Just ask her "Are we in love, or just friends?"
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