Is it absolutely normal to hate your ex to the point of getting irritated?

[Anonymous]

[provokeesmokee]

Depends on the ex, but probably.

I hated my ex-fiancé A LOT, but he lied to me for years about a lot of things and in very short order of our engagement was kind enough to show me what kind of deadbeat he was going to be.

He also made me go through the worst several months of my life once I dumped him. (And to my knowledge he hasn't moved out of his mother's house over a year after we broke up - he'd let go of his apartment lease to move and when that fell through thanks to his lazinss he moved into her house.)

I was annoyed and hated him for a good while. Now, though, he's a missile I dodged, a lesson learned, and a funny embarassing story for me to tell.

I don't really have strong feelings of annoyance at my other exes. My first exbf cheated on me, but he was dumped by his sidebitch and revealed himself to be a coward - and I have to recognize I wasn't a good partner to him. Doesn't excuse that he never tried communicating, but I can't fault him for being desperate.

My most recent exgf I am not annoyed with, just a standard hurt. I knew my risks with her and I took a chance. She also learned new things about herself, and I learned things about myself, too. So it's bittersweet but there's no anger.

What ISN'T normal is if you can't move past that emotion, and it begins influencing other relationships (any, not just romance). That's a sign you need some external help to process, heal, and learn.

[gothbxtch]

yeah, as long as you’re not like. constantly dwelling on that hatred. i wouldn’t fault you for that, but i would worry for you and recommend therapy if that were the case.

[gothbxtch]

thank you!!

[MrOracle]

I guess it depends on why they are an Ex. But hate not only consumes a lot of energy, it also is corrosive to your soul. Unless they really went beyond the pale, I recommend that you acknowledge that they are weak and immoral and pathetic, and get over it so that you can put the entire experience behind you The only thing you should bring forward is whatever lessons can be learned, so that you don't end up with someone like that in the future.

[glennos89]

It's most of times caused because of the pain people feel on the inside to get emotionally separated from their partner.

I dont think people trully hate their ex...
I think they hate the pain it brought them to go through the divorce

[BoopBoopBeep]

Nope. You're just harboring toxicity that's not going to help you build yourself. I don't hate the fish that went bad in my fridge last week. I threw it out and moved on with my life.

[Still-alive]

I suppose its normal however 'hate' implies that you still think about him and he still effects you. what you really want to get over him is indifference. where you no longer give a shit about him ever again and you no longer think about him.

[KingslayerC]

Hate just drags you down. Indifference is better

[CrimsonAngel09]

Hate you are doing just fine if a woman doesn't look like a model.

[Drumlin2001]

Depends. Personally I don't feel anything for ex, positive or negative. But I know people who hold a grudge against an ex.

[Sasha0426]

Depends on why you hate them. I know people hate their exes because they were abusive and didn’t treat them right. Other than that, there’s no reason to hate your ex.

[Agape93]

If you're hating them only to the point of being irritated, then you don't hate them.

[ProbablyClueless]

I don't think I would describe that as "normal," no.

[Ms_Facesitter]

No. To me that sounds like you haven't moved on yet.

[seddy]

I feel that way because my ex cheated on me while i was a stay at home mom for our two babies. So it depends on what they did I guess. Emotions are the foundation to most relationships so that's understandable.

[runnerboy]

It is too bad that things have to end up like that. But I guess it can happen

[Ben487]

yeah, but you eventually forget about them and the anger / irritation is gone.

[TheSpaceGnome]

Yes, its why they are your ex in the first place.

[mommymommymommy]

Why ex's think they can be "just friends", i dk

[SoJust]

No mate I not problem , everything come to pass don't worry , mate.

[In_Trance]

Learn to be done with people.

Not irritated; no hatred.
Just done

[dragoblack]

Well... they're your ex for a reason. So, yes it is normal

[Hardworkingguy]

Only if you don't want to move on and find something better in your life

[Alex8736]

it not worth it just keep moving forward and go no contact with the ex

[squirt_inducer_man]

No. If you hate your ex, you got involved with the wrong person. Why are you hating people?

[MementoMori777]

id say so, mostly if the breakup was foul