Is my girl a trying to manipulate me for her own financial means?

[randomBrotha]

I've been dating this girl for a year now on and off. Mostly because of her feeling like I didn't give her enough attention during my chemo treatments.

She has been asking me to think about moving to the Dominican Republic and to build a house there for us and to help her raise money to build another on land she bought for her mom.

I keep telling her that I love where I'm living I've got a really nice home near my family and have no interest in moving to a developing country with very little going for it, just because it's got a cheaper cost of living and nice weather.

I suggested us going for vacation throughout the year or visiting for a couple months a year and it wasn't enough.

Now ever since my mother died she's been hinting at the fact that her mom could be my new one and that I would love her. She has even been bringing it up during conversations with her friends. This lead us having a big argument after I abruptly shut down a conversation she was having about it with a friend of hers at the mall.

I mean, I can't even enjoy some one on one time with her at a mall without this topic coming up.

I'm starting to think she's just trying to manipulate me into doing something I don't want to.

Am I wrong?

[CuriousMindset]

1. She left because you didn’t give her enough attention while you were going through chemo? SHE should have been supportive of YOU and what you were going through, not expecting it the other way around. That tells me that she will never support you. Not in your decisions, not in anything that happens in your life. It will always be about her and what she can get. As soon as you can’t give her what she wants she will be out, Again.

2. You don’t need a “new mother”. None can take the place of your mother regardless if she is no longer with you. That is just an incredibly stupid thing to say to someone. But yes, by all means her mommy will love you just like your girl and use you until you can’t do anything for them anymore.

Just my opinion, but your relationship is not healthy at all and you might want to think about ending it sooner rather than later.

[randomBrotha]

Thank you, for your answer. I tend to struggle to tell if my thoughts are an overreaction or not.

[Anonymous]

All I had to read was she felt like you weren’t giving her enough attention during your chemo. She’s selfish. I’d let her go. Does she have kids? No woman could ever replace your mom. You have your own. This sounds more about what she wants. Not about what you two want as a couple. She does sound manipulative. You know this doesn’t feel right yourself that’s why you’re asking.

[randomBrotha]

Actually she does have a kid. I'm asking now cause it's just a number of things overtime that has had me step back and wonder whether I'm making the right move. Like asking me what it's like having my mom's fancy car after she died. As someone that doesn't care for fancy things, I found it to be off putting.

[Opinion Owner]

So then leave she doesn’t sound like a good person at all. How old is her child? Have you met her child? If so how long? How is that going? Are you allowed to discipline the child if need be?

[Avicenna]

It sure sounds like it. But even if her intentions are pure, it doesn't mean that it would be a good decision for you.

[Billlewis]

It certainly sounds like that might be the case.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

It’s a SCAM Bro!

[Staximus]

She wants to use you for your money

[Staximus]

She's probably trying to tie you down and wait till you die to get your money. Make a will and have an estate attorney look it over so it's rock solid. Have it notarized and made legally binding so your family gets everything when you die. Tell her that your family gets everything when you die and watch her disappear. You may not die but tell her that anyways.

[Staximus]

This girl is like a vulture circling overhead waiting for you to die

[Staximus]

Get rid of her asap

[KrakenAttackin]

Run like hell.

[butterly248]

Yeah, sorry