He's says you look great but you need to go to the gym more
As a man I can't stand it when other men do that kind of thing. You just don't say that even if it's true, and it's really not his place to anyway. But I think guys do that in the hopes that they'll get inside your head and make you do what they want, or even pursue them because of it.
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I initially just came here for the comment 😂 now I'm prompted to share some insights.
The question should have been phrased differently. Asking if "A GUY" tell you... automatically triggers women to be defensive and have the wrong attitude. Considering that women are compulsive thinkers. And the first reaction is always emotional rather than rational.
But according to the answers most women applied it to a S. O. on this basis, a life partner has every right to tell his s. o what they notices and keep them in check and vice versa. Telling a girlfriend or wife you've gained weight is being supportive, whilst cheating on a girlfriend or wife because of gaining weight isn't supportive. Because guess your appearance matter in keeping your partner attracted.
Scientifically speaking unlike men's body, the woman's body have more estrogen than testosterone. The result of this is rapid weight gain as well as other side effects. Lack of activity and bad diet will cause lot of women to gain fat.
Bottom line is if you get fat, I'll tell you, if you smell, ill tell you, if you look beautiful, I'll tell you. The only thing I'll make sure of is I convy the message as myself not how you want me to tell you. And it works both way. That's how you care about a life partner.
I would. I prefer it if he says what he sees rather than giving me advice that I didn't ask for.
so, if he says - you gained some weight lately, is something a problem? I can discuss it with him. We can think about health issues, visit a specialist, and after eliminating health concerns, simply lose weight.
If he says you need to go to the gym more we will probably have a serious disagreement. He is not my parent or guardian. So I won't accept this kind of behavior toward me.
Also, the first approach shows he wants to help and he is concerned; the second is quite demanding.
I think if it was your husband, he should say something. The way he brings it up or talks about it is so important too. I don’t think anyone would want to be with someone who is leaning on overweight/ obesity, even if they loved you. You’re not only damaging yourself but people around you too, kids, partner. It should be a kind conversation to resolve it. It can be hard to like with and watch someone get so big and have zero self control.
If a random guy, a guy I’ve been dating for a short time, etc, brings that up then yeah no. Next.
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No, but he’d be disappointed, as I can’t afford a gym membership.
I think it depends on who says it and the context. If it's your partner telling you, then that's their right to say it (although they attempt to approach it tactfully). Most people are attracted to people that take care of their health and appearance, and your partner is no exclusion. People have turned into such snowflakes nowadays that are hurt by the truth and men have to repress their true opinions in regards to their partner's fitness in fear their partner will explode and leave them.
If it's a friend, it's still okay as long as it's said in care and not just bluntly stating an opinion because they think you'd look better if you did workout.
And if it's a random person telling you that, then it's really not their place to say anything and is extremely rude.I would hope so , that is a disrespectful comment to anyone period , people that judge or make comments about anyone else’s weight is a disrespectful piece of shit period , that thinks their own shit doesn’t stink. I would say thank you for pointing that out on me , but I am perfectly happy with the way I am , but sadly apparently you aren’t happy with the way you are, , maybe you should go seek some help for your own personal insecurities , maybe people would actually like you as a person. Truth hurts
My opinion is a little radical, so it might not apply 100% but... twist it back on him. how likely is he to change something about himself to suit you? I don't want you to internalize his bullshit. They always want you to be in a perpetual state of insecurity and focusing on your own flaws to the point you don't notice he's not matching your standards and in this case being unaccepting. You're not an object he can tweak here and there to suit my needs. If he had said someyhing like that to me I'd tell him the situation isn't worth it. You do it for you when and if you want to.
That is insensitive and he lacks tact. The right thing to say is “hey I want to hit up the gym at least 3 times this week and I want you to come with me”. That way he is leading by example. It’s still dropping a hint but he’s showing that he’s holding himself to the same standard.
This is how I tried to help my last girlfriend. Truth is she was a bit “skinny fat” but I never made a comment about it. But I was trying to motivate her without being rude. So I would always be working out beside her. Showed her my motivation to motivate her.
I would take it as a sign that I need to go to the gym more, but I'm a man and don't get my panties in a twist when people make blunt comments that are obviously well-meaning.
It would be one thing if you're anorexic, but if you're overweight then you really should go to the gym more. Why get butthurt when someone else says what you know to all ready be true? Because they didn't tiptoe around the issue like a bunch of other people willing to let you harm your health because they didn't want to bruise your ego a little by stating the obvious?
As a guy answering this question, the suggestion being made to go to the gym depends on two things:
(1). Selflessness, as in your health depends on it.
Or:
(2). Selfishness, as in, even though l want to spend the rest of my life with you, if you were to lose weight, my dick would get hard more often.
Remember this however, if you lose enough weight, to the point that other men begin to notice you, your confidence will grow and whomever suggested you do so, will become insecure and fear losing you. That fear may also change his/her negative behaviors/attitudes towards you.I wouldn't date or fuck him, personally.
I have plenty of people wanting to love me as I am, and I used to be smaller, lol.
That said, if the dude wants me in the gym to build more muscle or because he's encouraging me to do something I've already been doing (climbing/training), then I would assume that's supportive.
But just some guy trying to neg? Fuck off, buddy. Sounds to me like he needs a girl to tell him he needs to go to therapy, lmao.If you mean a significant other/boyfriend then I don’t really mind. I like to stay somewhat fit anyways and the men I hang around are active and gym rats anyways.
My current boyfriend loves the gym, when we were just friends with benefits we used to go to the gym together as well because he loves it so much.
I would tell him that I don't got to the gym cause I refuse to get sweaty and sore and if he want me to lose weight he can just take me to five star restaurant that's the easiest ways to lose weight considering the portions are so small XD
If I’m that “ATTRACTED” to him, yes I’d go to the gym for him.
If I’m that into him, if I’m that entranced by him. YES._____
If not, then no. I could care less to impress him.
Hot Guy = Me wanting to be hotUgly / Mediocre Guy = Me wanting to be ugly
First of all, who is that guy?
If he's a co-worker who has a girlfriend or a wife, I might say "It's none of your business."
If he is someone who likes me, and I like him back, maybe we can date at a gym.
By the way, my future husband shouldn't be so shallow and ignorant for where my fat is actually located.
You have to look at it from the mans perspective. They often don't know how to word sensitive topics.
He could be concerned for your health mixed with his honest losing attraction.
He's trying to say something even if it's coming out in an abrasive way. At least that's how some woman might hear it.
At least he's saying something and not just cheating or leaving, yet.Oh I can’t count how many times guys tell me I should go to the gym. But I don’t let them dictate me. Idc who you are. My body, my rules.
If he says you look great but need more gym then he isn't telling you that you look great.
Hell yeah I would be put off!
What does he think I'm fat or something? I already go to the gym enough.
How about he goes to the gym more often?
He would need to either follow that up with a very emotionally vulnerable speech about why he wants to spend time together at the gym, or preface it with such in order for me to accept it as a positive thing
As a guy? I'd cringe just trying to tell a woman she needed to go to the gym more!
That said, I usually do go for women that spend a lot of time in a gym!
What can I say? I am somewhat of a paradox!
I already go a lot but if my partner said I need to go even more, I’d be suspicious about something. Considering we spend almost 2hrs a day for 6 days a week, alarm bells are going off.. why. I don’t think I’d be out off, I’d be concerned.
Depends who said it and how. If it's your partner that noticing you have started to get heavier, it's ok.
If it's a random person or even someone not close to you, less ok.
Anyway, getting into the gym and exercising, even in small amounts, is beneficial to get a better version of yourself.
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