Girls, You’re on a first date with a guy, don’t let him lean forward to kiss you at the end?

[Anonymous]

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Typo: would you let the guy kiss you on a first date*

[Abbycado]

I think you meant do you let him. No, not on a first date.

[Asker]

Yea that’s what I meant, so if you considered him good looking and funny you wouldn’t?

[Abbycado]

Not first date. If he knocks it out of the park and I am like this guy is the one, I’d probably second tho.

[Asker]

How does a guy “knock it out of the park” on a first date

[Abbycado]

It is all about a connection. I have been dating a guy since last August. He knocked it out of the park because we really connected. I just felt sparks. But that is he and I. That is not him and another girl maybe or me and another guy. It was right fit.

I can tell you what made it perfect for me, but that doesn’t necessarily help anyone else because like you, I’m unique too.

[Asker]

Wouldn’t you say it’s a mixed signal if a girl is flirty and talkative by text and phone, two meet up and she’s not feeling it, even though he’s the same guy she’s been talking to and he looks handsome in person, some girl do that.

[Abbycado]

Maybe to a degree. In person is sooooo different than phone and text. So many things look good on paper and then turn out not to be in life, ya know?

[Asker]

So how come the opposite doesn’t happen as often. Where she’s like ugh i don’t want to meet this guy, he’s not my type, she meets him and is like wow he’s great. I’ve had girls say you’re a smart guy, you’re an awesome guy, etc. but whatever as a guy I can’t convince a female to like me. I think the notion “just be yourself” isn’t that useful. I have guy friends who have wives or girlfriends tell me, you speak well dude it shouldn’t be tough for you to get a woman.

[Abbycado]

Because you have that initial gut feeling that makes it (to some) not worth it. You can’t change the way someone processes information when it comes to dating. They will do it how they do it.

What if someone told you the new restaurant in your town sucks big time? Now are you likely to go soon, or at all?

[Asker]

Nah gut feelings don’t really matter in my opinion. I’ve stood up for women’s rights or children being bombed only to hear or read that I’m a fucking moron or a POS by people by both males or females. Their perception of me is that. I mean women out there have the “he’s the one” but that doesn’t mean. 100% of the time it’ll work out, they may end in divorce or break and that’s common these days as we get older.

[Abbycado]

Not wrong, but that isn’t what we are really talking about. You made this very convoluted with the last reply. If someone gets a bad impression, I don’t expect them to give someone a chance. That is the other person saying they are entitled. They are not.

[Asker]

I said, the perception of a "bad" impression relating to dating is if he or she is rude on the date, late, or not talkative... that's a bad date. If a guy is a gentleman, pays for dinner, engaging in interesting conversations and making her laugh and she's still like ahhhhh no thanks he's not "it" (in her mind). That's not the guy's problem thats her immaturity. I know plenty of girls I used to talk to and the one's really messed up or have issues or the one's with daddy issues where a father is either absent in her life or abused her either physically or mentally. Many of these girls have grown up and told me their toxic ex relationships, and the reason why it didn't work with me is that when you have a normal, loyal guy, that's weird to them, and they may be used to that toxicity in life. That's breaking down the answer eloquently. So end of the day just because a guy is good in heart and people find him interesting and caring if she doesn't see that and choose a guy who gives half the effort well, again thats her problem, that's prerogative and just because she assumes the other guy who isn't great she's obviously attracted to something toxic about the other guy and psychologically no other guy can fix that, that's her choice. So when I answer questions on here by guys who feel down or depressed or worthless because girls are rejecting them or rude, I try to lift them up and tell them to work on themselves but also dont assume she's the one or she's the right one for him because he may have dodged the bullet not dealing with some psycho girl or a girl with issues and that's keepin' it 100.

[Nikki1989]

I would expect a kiss goodnight at the very least.

[Asker]

What if you knew in the back of your mind you won’t go on a second date with him would you still let him?

[Simslover92]

Nope. Maybe by the third date.

[chocolatetwopointo]

hell no