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Well the fact I'm ignored made fun of by women for being 5'5, 120, for my health problem, being a virgin, reading comics, working part time, not drinking or smoking...
I hold doors open but get rude comments, every young lady I date has had at least 12+ sexual partners, they make less then me but expect me to spend my money on them when I have bills and they just do nothing. I take my time to understand and talk to women I like but they just think I want a booty call, every time I get to know every thing about them favorite food, cool, movies they want to be friends. I want to move slow they want to move fast. The fact the last girl I dated I liked so much I haven't dated for a year.
And again you wonder why?
Women are now competing with men in all aspects of life. They are now 'in a man's world so to speak'. So they will get treated more like one (but still get some perks). This brings me to my point, related to my 1st sentence. Where do women think respect comes from? Do they think it's given freely and by default? Now that we are on equal terms, women by default don't deserve anything more then the basic respect one gives to any man they first meet. If you want more respect, it has to be earned over time. Just like any other man.
I otherwise agree with @MrOracle completely.
Yes, women think respect is given freely by default.
There is basic human respect. There is also respect in the form of admiration. Both men and women have both types.
When men talk about respect, they are often talking about the latter form. Women are usually talking about the former. I suspect this is linked to the fact that women are generally viewed as victims of their situation, while men are assumed to be responsible for their circumstances (hypo/hyperagency). Men live in a world where most respect is earned, and only a small amount is assumed. Women live in a world where most respect is automatic, and there's only a small additional amount to be earned.
@0112358 Nicely said.
Dating has become uneven. Girls (and I don't think they're even aware of this) expect a lot more effort from men than men are willing to give. Women want to be courted and chased and paid for and they don't believe it is necessary to put an equal effort in. Why would an in demand guy put his resources into dating you when your one bargaining chip, sex, is something he can get elsewhere easier? Men are expected to prove themselves and this standard needs to be demanded of women as well. Until women take up an equal role in dating I can't have any sympathy because they do it to themselves.
In other words, stop putting your pussy on a pedestal that doesn't exist anymore and bring something of substance to a relationship. Happily ever after isn't something you are owed because you have a vagina.
Exactly
"Why do men believe something is wrong with having a relationship that would not include sex unless they get married?"
Because they see sex as a healthy part of a relationship and don't want to wait years.
"Why are virgins looked down upon, being a woman's first is no longer a good thing?"
Male virgins have always been looked down upon, female virgins have been highly praised.
"Why is chivalry as good as dead?"
Because it's a sexist tradition, and today's gender equality leaves no more room for sexist traditions. Politeness is the new chivalry.
"What happened to proving yourself to the woman, proving that you are really interested in her?"
Oh look, more sexism. You are not some sort of "prize" or "conquest", you're a human being. Start acting like it. Men don't have time to "prove themselves", especially when the woman won't "prove herself" back. Stop putting yourself on a pedestal.
I was about to post a large rant, but it seems you beat me to the punch. Nice work, fully agreed. The second-to-last point really irks me as well.
yup i feel the same!
"Because they see sex as a healthy part of a relationship and don't want to wait years."
Understandable. Waiting til marriage is stupid and unreasonible tbh
"Male virgins have always been looked down upon, female virgins have been highly praised."
Female virgins were praised because they could find a husband that slept around A LOT which I dont think is a good thing. The only reason female virginity is praised is because males want to be the first to deflower her to build his ego
"Because it's a sexist tradition, and today's gender equality leaves no more room for sexist traditions. Politeness is the new chivalry."
Got that right but it seems like other sexist crap thats still happening isn't going away
Who said about being a prize? If men werent such users women wouldn't need a man to prove his self.. Men play women all the time and most women dont want to give themselves away to a bf/husband just to find out he was using her this entire time.
Women wanted to be treated like humans and not sexual idols. That's what this looks like.
Men don't respect nor disrespect women right off the bat (for the most part) If you want to be fought for... be worth it. Having a vagina doesn't make you worth it. Having a beautiful personality that is really unique as well as beauty to compliment it makes you worth fighting for...
Girls can have that with guys when there 30/40 no guy in 16-30 wants that. Life is to short to settle down. Guys these days value them self and their own need first. Its a new fast pace world. why waste on a girl if she not going to give back what ur giving in the relationship. Months is way to long. The trade off isn't equal my quality time and money for one or two nights of sex. No when another girl will do it for less.
Also like guys are trying to better them self in worn and school no one has time for relationship maybe a quick fling here and there. people settle down when they are ready. And no is ready at 18 or 22 or 26.
Its a matter of guys spending there time wisely what little time have. Girls are not some magic thing that nee to be put on a pedestal they bleed like the rest of us.
So yeah people are just people. the world ifast pace now keep up
You are generalizing women when not all women are the same.
Yeah, no. 30/40 year old guys are even less likely to act that way, though they may choose to settle down if they want a family.
But their expectations for quick sex etc. are much higher, not lower.
I agreee with that... waiting MONTHS for sex is laughable. If she isn't sexually hot for me enough to want to fuck me sooner, I feel she is just settling on me and doesn't REALLY like me.
@Kira88 said men no longer think women worth it:
Because the roles have been lost in gender awareness. Traditional roles worked in a lot of ways and women are becoming more aggressive and less feminine. But the social shift doesn't change what people are attracted too. Such as manly men and feminine women.
Related question: www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1767400-why-do-men-today-say-most-women-are-not-worth-settling-down-with
Also when we have apps like tinder where women are basically giving up their pussy to multiple hot guys with no string attached sex, why should a man chase you, put effort into you when another man gets you for free?
Why do men believe something is wrong with having a relationship that would not include sex unless they get married?
Because as someone on gag here would say women play hard to get and make a guy wait if he's relationship material but then has sex with another guy whose hot or rich on the first night.
"Why are virgins looked down upon, being a woman's first is no longer a good thing?"
Female virgins aren't looked down upon. Male version however are.
"Why is chivalry as good as dead?"
Because women preached about wanting equality. They are now capable of working and let's be honest some women are either rude to you when you are chivalrous or don't appreciate it at all.
"What happened to proving yourself to the woman, proving that you are really interested in her?"
Equality, and the fact women have forgotten their part in the equation. Proving that they are worthy of the man's equipment. Too many women don't ask what they bring to the relationship besides their vagina.
"Why are women so highly dispensible to men?"
Women are only disposable to the alpha males that women just seem to keep falling for and chase. They keep going after guys that other girls already fine attractive (i. e. they have competition) and then get upset when the guy uses them just for sex.
I can actually agree with this :)
As far as trying to show a woman I like her. Well I am an anxious person and afraid of crossing a line that would ultimately lead to her hating me or something. It is just hard for me to for some reason. I don't want to creep her out and I certainly want to show her I like her. I don't know it is hard to explain. Just to give you some hope. I never think women are just despensible. This is one of the reasons as to why I haven't dated anyone yet. I want to make sure I like her before I continue, and sometimes it is still hard for me to. Ok lets be honest everyone thinks about sex and wanting to have it. That's normal, but come on people of you want a relationship it is more then that. The girl I currently like I am fine with not doing any of that I just want to be there with her doing anything. I could literally just be sitting there watching paint dry and listening to her talk.
Your looking at everything from a one-sided pov.
Why would anyone get married before they have sex? What if they aren't sexually compatible as in not enjoying sex with each other.
There's nothing wrong with being a virgin but lacking sexual experience isn't ideal for everyone
I hope chivalry stays dead. Why treat a someone so differently just because they're a different gender. Screw chivalry, just be kind to people.
WTF!! since when is everyone trying to date a judge or a jury?2 What am I supposed to prove to her, that i'm interested. If someone is pursuing you then they are interested. And why doesn't she have to prove that she's interested in me?
"Why are women so highly dispensible to men?" I can't even respond to such a one-sided statement.
Agree with first 3 points
"WTF!! since when is everyone trying to date a judge or a jury?2 What am I supposed to prove to her, that i'm interested. If someone is pursuing you then they are interested. And why doesn't she have to prove that she's interested in me?"
That is very dumb. You do know that most men that pursue women only want to use her for sex right? That why proving he's there to stay is important
Lonewolf_1296 LMAO that was for you know which statement I was replying to smh. Guess you're to dumb to realize lol
@Lonewolf_1296
@ThatGirLqueen
Yeah there are plenty guys who will just want a girl for sex but assuming that's what every guy is trying to do kinda sucks. I understand a girl trying to make sure she doesn't get the old "hit and quit" treatment but I don't like the guilty before innocent mentality, a girl can stay wary about this stuff without being so paranoid. Honestly that question just irked me the wrong way, as if there is something inherently wrong with a guy so he has to prove he is not an asshole. Well at least that's how I saw it.
I totally agree with you but sadly thats how the world is. I had a crush from high school that wanted to have sex before starting a relationship. I was like "O_O" and he was like " I dont think you'll have sex with me so I want to make sure before being with you". That hurt like hell lol but I think I everyone has their reasons on that. It sucks that some girls use guys for things and it sucks that some guys use girls for sex to the point where we have to "make sure"
@ThatGirLqueen
Dang, sorry about your encounter with that horndog. I guess being a little guarded is the only way to make sure nothing shitty happens.
Girl, you took the words out of my mouth. Just yesterday someone asked me why don't I get a boyfriend. I really didn't know how to answer because just how do you force yourself to fall in love? Love doesn't just come because you want a boyfriend. Do people not care about love anymore and just rush into relationships? I couldn't answer because there is a voice deep inside me that tells me why bother when true love doesn't seem to exist anymore and it became like winning the lottery and loving men are no longer there. Once they THINK you don't like them, they give up on you. Chivalry? Fighting for a woman they love? You're kiddin' me! Oh yeah and let me tell you I hate the feminists who contributed to that.
Why do you want men to desperately prove themselves to you? This isn't the 1950's. Men aren't groveling at your feet anymore, get used to it. Why do you expect men to do that when you won't do it back?
From your other comments, it still seems like you believe in "the chase".
Simply put, men are sick of it. They don't want to chase women around anymore, especially when they play hard to get. It's incredibly one-sided. Show some interest back. Stop fooling around with "the chase" and I guarantee you'll find better men.
True no buddy got time for that :)
All that chasing is exhausting. Im like a lion I only chase what I can catch lol
Sometimes I wonder if this chick is the only girl here who really understands both sides.
@tyber1 I'm not the only one, I've seen plenty more (thankfully), but sometimes you need to look harder to find us.
Lmao I'm exaggerating but only to an extent. I can't tell you how often I see you as the only female voice of reason on male topics.
Your post made me laugh. Talk about misunderstood! I do not want any man to grovel at my feet, I cannot speak for others but I am a kindhearted person so the part about not doing it for them does not apply to me. Nor do I want men to "desperately prove themselves to me. I have found from this take that GAGers in general are very judgmental, and quick to draw the wrong conclusions. I just decided to respond since so many agreed with your wrong judgment of me. But thank you for your opinion, enjoy the rest of your day!
Basically you have a bunch of beta males speaking on behalf of the whole male population. Thankfully not all males are like this. But then you have a some females who suffer from internalized sexism and will attack you for wanting a chivalrous gentleman.
What do you think a beta male is?
@Bysshe one who doesn't fuck on the first date and is chivalrious instead of a mean badass "alpha".
@Lonewolf_1296 That's clearly not what she means though.
@Bysshe To me a beta male is self-absorbed, self-pitying, selfish, defends irrational excuses, rationalizes deceptive tactics, has destructive mental habits, competes with women, intimidated by women, views sex as something owed to them, unwilling to listen and learn, they are driven by fear, has an "every man for himself" train of thought, see's himself as a victim, and brings down other men to make them self look better. An example of the last one is demeaning a gut who chooses to pull his dates chair out for her and calling him sexist for having manners.
**guy
"competes with women" Rather than what?
Do you think a (successful) womaniser could be a beta male then?
@Bysshe They rather compete then cooperate with women.
Succeccful as a womaniser or successful in life in addition to being a womanizer.
Successful as a womaniser (perhaps successful in other ways, but not necessarily).
@Bysshe To me no. He would be a beta. He's just using his womanizing ways as a form of self validation. An Alpha views women as partners and sees sex more as a form of communication.
I don't think your use of the terms matches their general meaning: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alpha_(ethology)
@Bysshe I had a feeling you were going to post that. The general terms to describe human alpha and beta males don't match up to the ethological definition either. The views on Alpha and Beta males in human society are now defined by societal views.
Speaking generally, women have become very ungrateful and have raised their standards to completely unreasonable levels. Pair that with the fact that being with a woman is very legally perilous for a man, whether they're married or not, it removes most incentive to build a long-term relationship with a woman.
Granted, there are still good women out there, looking at you Kayla ;)
Everything you said is bullcrap. Women only raised our standards because we didn't even have standards at first. We were property and of course men loves that because they could control us
And that bish Kayla, is a woman hating sexist. Of course, you'll approve of her. She'll kiss your a$$ and every other men
@ThatGirLqueen So because she prefers to live traditionally she's a suck up to men? I prefer to cater to my man and that doesn't make me a woman hater. A lot of you women don't even act like ladies anymore you guys have so much negative energy.
@ThatGirLqueen well Kayla certainly doesn't kiss my ass lol.
Change of values, successful marriages require more than just attraction and a couple dates. Everyone today is too selfish, greedy, and their egos are too big. Marriage requires patience, maturity, respect, and humility. No one wants to live with a bitch or an asshole for 20 years. No one wants to be humiliated, beat, or ordered around, or a walking banking account. Another large factor is addiction, we have so many addicts here in the states. It really is an epidemic. Alcoholism has always been around, but now we are also dealing with heroin, meth, crack etc. It's just more poisons that reach more people. I'd say the biggest problems why most marriages fail, are physical abuse, infidelity, addiction, and financial problems. Marriage isn't worth it today, it's too much risk.
or be a walking bank account*
Wow this is so sad to hear... "Marriage isn't worth it today, it's too much risk." That last sentence left me winded. But thank you for your opinion.
You know, for all my tough talk I'll probably remarry. Lmao. Once bitten twice shy, that's probably all it is.
Women are not the ONLY bitches
@ThatGirLqueen That's true. I was just mentioning general problems with marriage for both genders. I've been through a marriage that honestly wasn't too bad, but in the end it didn't work out. She's remarried, we're just friends now.
Equality needs to be equal.
"going through desert storms and pouring rain for" is nothing a man owes any woman off the bat simply because of gender. Frankly I think that is sexist. Sure if he really WANTS to do that I am not going to try and stop him, but men are not simply agents of emotional satisfaction achievement for women alone. Instead of seeing men as these white knights and unpaid body guards who only exist to cater to the needs of women, you should see them as individuals with free will.
Two equal individuals should have to prove themselves to one another. It sounds like you just want to be put on a pedestal. Do you just enjoy making men do things they don't want to do? I'd hate to be your future husband...
It is the complete lack of respect for other people in general that perpetuates the egocentric self-serving behaviors that run rampant in society today. Everyone expects instant gratification in life, especially when it comes to relationships and sex. We have come to the extreme of valuing a person with a "swipe" , so until people pull their heads our of their assess and "social media" and start engaging in real human experiences, the dating game will remain a pathetic version of itself. I hope that changes, but time will tell.
Why do men believe something is wrong with having a relationship that would not include sex unless they get married? This answer does not apply to me.
Why are virgins looked down upon, being a woman's first is no longer a good thing?
Why is chivalry as good as dead? Again this answer does not apply to me.
What happened to proving yourself to the woman, proving that you are really interested in her? I have no problem here except for she also has some proving to do.
Why are women so highly dispensable to men? This doesn't apply to me either.
I'm a 20 year old who very badly wants the type of relationship that does wait until marriage for sex, I've turned down friends with benefits kinda all because I wanted something real, however there's a catch, while I only want one to spend my days with-I must find her physically attractive as well, that is a must and is a natural human idea, I couldn't date an ugly girl and wouldn't give the average girl a shot, honestly most guys after something real do seem more selective in what we want given how we'd treat the girl, hell I even went bald at 18 from TE but still hold my standards high, I just mean to say that guys who want something real are out there but we are rare and the fact we tend to be pickier given we want something lasting makes the chances you'll find us slimmer
Well i guess the root of all the problems is that guys are all the same. See, we're part of this sort of have mind. We're autonomous and the way we interact with people and our beliefs don't vary from person to person.
The second problem is that we're evil and we don't have any empathy. We just like to hurt women and we only care about ourselves.
The third problem is that we never have any problems ever so we would never be able to relate to women who have all the problems.
I mean, i can't recall any situation ever in the history of humankind where a woman has treated a man less than perfectly.
In short, your opinion is right and your question is sound in its logic. You should make zero attempts to brighten your worldview. You should have the highest standards in the world and never think you're any less than perfect.
Note to both genders: this question is getting old and this is how i will answer now.
Lol...
I also don't see the benefits of having a girlfriend you have to pay for dates call her but not to much or else your desperate then after all that she could say your dick isn't big enough it's not her fault yeah but you just wasted your time and if you did have kids she could take them away and have half of what you make? then chicks complain why does the most attractive biggest dick guy come and talk because he has so many choices all these chicks falling for for nothin but look of course he don't care