How Men Put Themselves In The Friend Zone

How Men Put Themselves In The Friend Zone

That's right. Girls don't friendzone you. You do!. When you really like a girl, there are two things that can happen. Either she goes out with you or she rejects you. And the middle ground is the "friendzone" which is the really the worst if you ask me.
But how do you get in the friendzone? I think the most important reason for that is not making your intentions clear.

How Men Put Themselves In The Friend Zone

This is literally the biggest mistake you can do. You have to make your intentions clear. You have to flirt with her but don't come off too strong. Just small indications and hints that tell her that you want to be more than just friends.
If your conversations with are boring and full of dry texts, that's not good for you. How is she even gonna know that you want a relationship with her and not friendship. I mean she's not someone with a mind reading ability. Don't pursue her aggressively but it should always be obvious that you're pursuing her as more than just a friend.

How Men Put Themselves In The Friend Zone

Why many guys don't flirt with a girl they like, is because they fear rejection. They think they'll never be able to go out with her so they become her miserable buddy and she keeps whining to you about her exes which obviously you couldn't give two fucks about.
If you like her, ask her out. Simple. If she says yes, great! If she says no, great. Because you didn't waste your time giving her all your attention and time only to find out later that she just wants to be friends and then you go back to having sex with your right hand while you watch porn videos, miserable and alone. Clarity is a gift.

How Men Put Themselves In The Friend Zone

Rejection is a part of life. You'll probably be rejected by many women in your life. You can't be a little bitch fearing rejection. And it's always better to get rejected right away than after being friends with her. Because she's not gonna have one of those moments when she realizes that all the guys she has been dating are assholes and her true love is you, and then you fuck her. That rarely happens. In your imagination probably, while you daydream.
Also you don't let her vent to you about other guys. It's not your job to listen to her guy problems. She has girlfriends for that. If you think you being her therapist is going to get you in her pants, you're wrong. Don't think if she's telling you her problems, she's being intimate.

How Men Put Themselves In The Friend Zone

Another reason why you get friendzoned is because you're trying to date a woman out of your league. Yup. If you look in the mirror and see one ugly bastard, you probably are. And while you look like a potato, you can't date a megan fox lookalike. When you realize that, you are going to have much more success in your dating life.
I was watching a movie where Will Smith said "Every man has a chance with every woman in the world" or something like that I don't know. And that's probably true but girls in their teenage are most likely to go for the hotter dude.
But of course, there are a lot of women that are still going to find your ugly ass attractive because beauty is subjective. So it's all about finding the perfect one❤️.
Have a nice day!


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Most Helpful Guys

  • I agree with you. But I also believe that Friendzone is ultimately a mutual agreement. She can insist on it, but that doesn't mean the guy has to accept it. If the guy doesn't accept the terms and walks away, he never was friendzoned. She wanted platonic, he wanted romantic, walking away levels the field.. neither gets what they want.

    What usually ends up happening is the woman is confronted with her friend suddenly wanting to change the dynamics of their relationship, and she isn't interested. She tells the guy she is happy with the way they were. Guy goes along with it hoping she will change her mind. He has just accepted being in the friendzone.

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    • As you said, Making intentions clear is important. But it is also important to repeat them occasionally. Make it clear, keep it clear. The passive "buddy your way in" is a recipe for failure.

  • LOL bullshit. A girl friend zones because she chooses to and can. Because you gave her the opportunity no action you do can change her mind. Getting friend zoned is a decision not something that happens because you did something wrong.

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    • Sounds like something a loser would say 😂😂

    • Sounds like something a loser would respond to the truth with 😂😂 cuz he’s got nothing else on me.

Most Helpful Girls

  • I appreciate that no one wants to be rejected. Men have very little idea of the ways they reject women. But friendship with a woman is not a shitty consolation prize either. I generally do not even like to date guys who don't make an effort to get to know me as a friend first.

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    • It's a shitty consolation prize if the guy has always and will always want more. It's best to move on instead of stick around, essentially pretending to be a friend and watching the girl become intimate with a guy that isn't them. Setting oneself up for emotional pain isn't the smartest way to go about things.

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    • And that’s life. Yes men do friendzone women. I confess I did it a few times without speaking up in high school and college. But in the last 10 years I spoke up early. I had to do it twice this year after a first date. Ugly truth is both girls were too heavy. But despite being disappointed (dating app catfish pics) I still talked to them and didn’t stage some extremely disrespectful fake emergency bullshit. I gave them the respect of knowing I just wanted to be friends when they asked me to go on a second date.

      Most women never reciprocated that respect to me. They string me along for attention, free meals, someone to carry their heavy shit, free counseling, etc. I have met shithead women like that. Now I have radar for them.

      But you know a butthurt response many women throw out if a guy rejects them? He’s probably “gay”! Yes I’ve heard that protect my ego shit several times. I was called that out loud for turning a girl who wanted to dance with me in college. Now how often do you see men accusing women of being lesbians if they get turned down?

    • Also I agree with you that guys think they get instant easy sex if a woman approaches them. That is something men need to change if they want women to approach guys more. I’m guilty of that myself.

  • You're in the friendzone because you're dumb enough to think she'll change her mind if you stay forever by her side even when she already said no.
    Great take, finally a guy said it!! The last paragraph made me laugh.

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    • You dont know donkey doo.😕

    • @NorwegianBoy Sure. No one forces the guy to stay there. Friendzone is either cowardice or stupidity.

    • Your paragraph hits my situation much more than the writer of this post. And yea I think I was in friendzone out of stupidity but it was love induced and i was led on. When you love someone a certain way you get clouded. Read my response to the main article and tell me where i went wrong. And yes I believe I really fuxked up

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Did the loser guy that likes me and but kept acting like he wasn't into me write this? because he's definitely in the friend zone now. He's handsome but what an absolute idiot, mind games are for losers. He tried to call me while I was asleep and I didn't call him back, idiot.

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  • Well written and pretty accurate. We women doubt your intentions just as much as you doubts ours. Clarity and validation would be nice. For as much as you think there’s twenty guys competing with you for our affection we think the same about twenty women competing against us for you.

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    • dont blame men
      and fucking accept your fucking responsibilites
      for disgusting women like you is always guy fault
      you are disgusting

    • Learn to read little boy! I was agreeing with the asker! You’re an idiot!

    • Angry Norwegian dude here

  • You are in the friendzone because :
    1. She doesn't find you handsome
    2. She is a hoe
    3. She is too shy to show you she likes you in a different way than a friend and you didn't make it clear you want more...
    Now it depend swhich one is your case. For 3. You can scare her off if you show too much interested in the beginning. Actuallybit is not just for shy girls, but for many.

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    • You forgot number 4: you are too nice

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    • Yes I know that. But it’s a fucking tight rope to walk. You have no idea how difficult that is.

    • How would her friend zoning a guy make her a hoe? Lmao

  • Well o can day for a majority of cases you are right you can't expect to just be there for someone and have them want you. It's kind of fucked up and while down down that is something that women want (rooted in their nature) they also need an attraction to you. If you come across as a brother that's what you'll be to her. But now let me tell you my story and you tell me if its all on me.

    There was this girl she was my big in my coed fraternity. We got a long super well and she was extremely flirty and touchy. (Girls gotta watch that shit). Anyway we had the best conversation I'd talk to her in other languages and shed say that was really hot and just give me some gazing glimmering eyes. She said I looked like an singer she had a crush on. Our friendship developed and we went to volunteer at a triathlon and whole camping we spooned. Now all this time this girl had a boyfriend and so I did make a move but when we came back from the trip I told her how I felt I told her I had a crush on her and really liked being with her. She told. me she didn't feel the same way. Ok I was hurt but still loved our convos so I accepted it. She then started complaining to me how I was so much funner to be with than her boyfriend ans they werent getting along. Shed come over to my place and sleep on my bed while I worked. She then asked me to guess what color thong she was wearing. This was a common occurrence. I loved our conversation and just being with her and I started feeling super in love with her. I confronted her again. While I was talking she just walked up to me wrapped her arms around my neck and looked up at me. I wrapped my arms around her back and kept talking. I dont remember what else she told me then but later on she said. I really wanted to kiss you at that moment. Ultimately though I was under the impression she wouldn't leave her boyfriend. One time he even confronted me about staying out of their relationship. She asked if I was scarred but naw I wasn't. Anyway another girl who I guess I had friend zoned told me I should stop chasing that girl that it wasn't going anywhere and I should move on. I agreed. The love was still there but I once again excepted only friend and that's how its gonna be. Anyway this girl was pretty amazing she was a great friend and super nice. We did end up going out and while the feelings were no where as close as for the other girl I still liked her. She asked me if I would visit her during the summer and I said eh (I'm an asshole shoulda known then I wasn't right for her). She was super sweet with me and tested me to see if I really did like her. She also gave great handjobs like at the time felt better than mine. Not sure how she knew so much. Anyway the school is coming to an end and the other girls tells me to come visit. I go over to her place and she tells me she doesn't wanna be with her boyfriend anymore she wants to be with me and kisses my cheek. I immediatly head over to the other girls place to break things off. (This was the last day of school). She hasn't broken up with the other guy yet but we walk around campus watching graduation ceremonies holding hands. Anyway she tells me to visit and I said I will. I go and visit 3-4 times that summer. Write her poems , made some drawings. Kinda was my muse. Anyway she tells me she's dtill with girlfriend but they aren't talking. she's telling me he's getting really buff and it pushes me to workout hard. I've never worked out that hard before or since. I went from 16% body fat to 10% had a four pack going on and gained 25 lbs of muscle When I come over we talk i shower walk in shirtless she's like nice then we talked some more I graze and touch her leg a couple times with my hand and she let's me we ended up getting on the couch and trying to figure out where we were both ticklish. Touching dangerously close to places. Then her ex shows up and she talks like an hour to him and come back and doesn't wanna talk anymore.

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    • I forgot to mention this whole summer long we were skyping. She would change in front of me or be in a bikini and stuff. Anyway I visit other times and she still hasn't broken up with the boyfriend so i can't make moves. Something weird is happening with her ex and kinda pushed us apart. She brales. uo with boyfriend last month of summer. Anyway school begins again and it's my birthday within a week. For my birthday she gives me a kiss in the mouth she had me drinking beforehand hoping I would forget and was surprised when I didn't forget. Then I'm helping her with her he another day and she Frenches me catching me by surprise. Telling me she's been wanting to kiss me since the day we talked after I started loving me. A few days later we are making out on my bed and then cuddled. she's talking about being confuses thinking about her 2 exes and me and how she might like her original ex. A few days after that she tells me about this guy in her class she has great convos with. She then tells me she's been cuddling with the dude. She comes over and I asked if she wanted t cuddle since she was tired and stuff. And she straight up said. I dont wanna just cuddle with any random person. A phrase that to this day destroyed me. Al the sudden o was nothing to her and it was al this dude. I made her tell me she wasn't ever gonna love me because se was destroying me and she said yea never. I accepted it and realized that shot was done. I think I was just too short for her and even though she liked me that was enough to never move forward. she's 5'4 I'm 5'8. Anyway at the end of the year I find a new girl and she knows this and she's tried saying she was sorry and made a mistake and if I still wanted to be with her. I said no. The when I told my girlfriend the qhole. story of this girls. she's like nah that bitch has got to go. So I dropped that friendship and with it another 20 friends. Soooo? Thoughts?

  • Extra piece of advice from me. Never be friends with a female. Women are for sexual relationships only, and can't perform the duties required of a genuine friend.

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  • Disagree with you about "How is she even gonna know that you want a relationship with her and not friendship." .. women know within a few minutes if a guy likes her or not.

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    • I agree, women tend to know, but not being open about it provides good ammunition for plausible deniability, i. e. "I didn't know you had feelings for me. I thought you just washed to be friends." Perfect way out.

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    • Why does he risk make a fool of himself? is getting a no for answer being ridiculed or something like that? Making a statement like "I don't like you" even if he said nothing to me is being ridiculous.

    • @NineBreaker they do tend to know yes, but they won't jump to conclusions until they are 100% sure we like them. Some guys will flip it around and make it out that she was hitting on him and that he wasn't interested so she will feel super embarrassed as girls fear rejection more than we do. It's too much of a hit to their ego as they rarely get turned down.

  • Uh, no, if a woman doesn't want to bed you but likes you then you are AUTOMATICALLY in the friendzone. They keep beta-orbiters around like pets, as long as they validate her and do things for her.

    If a woman wants to get with a man she'll break all the rules to do it.
    If she doesn't she'll make up a new rule everyday why she can't.
    __Browneye

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  • Conversely, someone who just cut ties with you because you didn't want to be more than friends has probably never really liked you that much.

    At least that's how it felt to me. If there were any doubts in my mind, then after that there were none.

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    • That's not entirely true. The reason why some guys will just end it is because 1) there are guys who got rejected before and hung around to be "the friend" and nothing progressed and all that guy wanted was sex and 2) which is like number one except the guy genuinely wanted to be with her beyond sex. Take it from me, I went through a roller coaster of emotions with a girl who liked me, wanted nothing to do with, then wondered why I stopped talking to her, then talked to her again and made my intentions known to her rejecting me and saying lets be friends, to getting into arguments thus breaking off whatever I knew of her of never speaking to her again because she hates my guts (mind you we never fucked, never kissed, I apologized).

      Guys don't want to be some gay guy in a girl's life listening to her problems, that's what girlfriends are for, your friends who are girls are there to listen to you. The only way things will change if is she has an attraction for the guy and respects him more so then any guy friend she has in her life. Girls/women won't wait around but you know what I am not going to wait around either, life is too short for waiting around.

      Becoming friends is fine, but it shouldn't take years, I am a pretty fairly social person where I can be friends with someone within a few weeks and within a few months ask them if they want to hang out to watch a movie or do something. If a girl is taking her sweet time, I can't wait around and she has to respect that. Life moves fast, people aren't going to wait around, guys mistake being friend zoned but girls make the mistake of assuming they have so many options, eventually as girls age and enter their late 20s, 30s or even 40s that's where things can become an issue and then women think holy shit, I gotta buckle down.

      Even apps like Tinder or Happn or Bumble, women in their 30s are looking for some prince charming before even meeting the guy.

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    • @Yuras I understand, I guess it's for the person's own sake and mental health.

    • I’m gonna have to RESPECTFULLY disagree. There were girls I genuinely liked that I cut ties with. It’s really just asking for pain if I know I like you and you just want to be friends. I’m always gonna want more, and the chances of you wanting what I want are slim to none. Eventually either you’re gonna fall for somebody else and it’s gonna kill me, or my desire for a romantic relationship is gonna out you in awkward situations. It’s not easy to walk away from someone you like, but it’s whats best in the end, and it’s better to do it sooner rather than later in my experience.

  • Oh for the love of God... No. Just no. Take agency for your own actions. If you friendzone someone, it's on you, not them. Doesn't mean it's the wrong choice, but it DOES mean you are the one responsible for your life.

    Saying that men are friendzoning themselves means you are incapable of making the choice on your own; that their actions dictate your choices.

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  • You are NOT wrong, and I would add:
    dress well - a girl can love you for you, but are you REALLY a bum?
    Kino - art of touching and that shit works. It works better than talking, if done right.
    have fun - asking a girl out is like going into a boxing match, if you are all tense, you will not be on your best game. However, if you are too lax, you will be defeated.

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  • Best to plant the seed (make it known you like her) then get rejected... then wait however long it takes... as if it mever happened. Leave it alone and live your life accepting defeat. Days turn to weeks to months but she will respond. Almost always happens like that.

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  • Guys put themselves there because they don't understand the attraction have to be felt from both sides.

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    • I agree with this. I think that's the problem guys have, all these stupid shows of how to pick up women and girls are ridiculous. I do think self-confidence and having the ability to talk is important but I tend to find only immature girls or girls who are drawn by a man's words and the size of his wallet get attracted to one-liners and that nonsense.

  • Yeah, sorry... not true. At all. I appreciate the thought you put into this though.

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  • You are 100% right. Thanks for informing these guys so they can stop complaining about stuff they do to themselves.

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  • This is bullshit, girls don't know what they want. They go out with the same guys that hurt them then complain, while they friend zone the good ones.

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  • They want sex or a relationship with a girl who doesn't like them like that or is spoken for. There's nothing in the world that will change that. Often the friendzone is reserved for creepy guys

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  • there is NO FRIENDZONE if the girl finds u sexually attractive ;)
    just to clear ur mind guys
    i know wha im talking about

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  • So fun to read lol. Just because you got friendzoned, doesn't mean there is no escaping that zone.

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  • I say men aren't wrong to reject the LJBF bullshit. in my opinion. any man who doesn't is a nutless Momma's boy faggot orbiter.

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  • If you try asking for date advice, they will surely friendzone your ass, if you tease and play tricks on them. Like josh on clueless hahahah

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  • I think you’re right about a few things. I agree with you that guys play a part of being friend zoned, and I think you were spot-on about it being the middle ground. But I’ve witnessed in many cases where the guy voices that he wants a relationship with the girl, and the girl won’t commit nor will she reject him. They usually use the guise of “well I didn’t want to be mean”, but in most cases that’s BS. They just don’t want to have to be mean to the guy’s face. Instead they’d rather string him along, giving him hope, while actually having no intention of starting a relationship with him. OR they say “you’re one of my best friends, and I don't know what I’d do if I ever lost you.” This is also BS, because once they find a guy they want to be with if they’re forced to choose, they’re gonna choose the romantic interest. So yes, I agree with what you said, BUT girls are not oblivious when they friend-zone a guy, and it share blame in the situation as well.

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  • You are very right and I have done this many times scared to make a move then she gets a boyfriend it is better just to ask a girl out right from the jump

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  • can't say more than what's been said , but usually giving a big fuck you to any woud be friendzoner makes the lets be friends option not available

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  • I only hang out with women I like as people. If there is more mutually, cool, but since getting in her pants was never my only goal I don't care.

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    • This is how male female friendships are formed,. At least I believe so. If there weren't any attraction in the begening, you wouldn't be interested in getting to know that person of the opposite sex.

  • When you said some girls will find your ugly ass attractive that makes you sound very unattractive. Remember that when a guy rejects you

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  • Those are same reason why girls date the wrong guys.

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  • I agree with this but I see nothing wrong with just being friends with a woman anyway.

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  • Very true. Ask her out. If she says no, move on. It really is that simple.

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  • It's quite easy. Just rub her thighs. She will get the indication, right?

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  • So what about when you get rejected by all girls not only hot

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  • My crush friendzoned me and she is my best friend now I don't know where i would be without her

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  • or just simply telling a woman you have feelings for her

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  • This was low key unnecessary lol

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  • Soooooo true!

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  • HAHAHAHA MGTOW

    don;t waste your time

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  • Not liking women as friends is misogyny.

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  • Good take. ..

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  • White knight

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  • It's not "friend zone" it's friends.

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    • It’s friends if both parties mutually agree it’s okay. It’s friendzone if one party just assumes (or hopes) the other party is okay with it. There needs to be communication.

  • Ron escaped the friend zone though.

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  • It's always a man's fault unfortunately

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  • Okay...

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