A message I received today...
"you young lady deserve a thurough raping so you can learn the value of a strong police force. maybe if something bad happens to your family or your vagina you'll understand why law and order is more important than kindness or human life"
This is what females deal with on a daily basis. Pieces of **** like this reminding us that there are still, in 2020, plenty of men who feel it is their right, their privilege, maybe even their duty, to inform, explain, and teach what our meagre little female brains are not getting, not understanding about the world, and, we get insulted, attacked, and violence threatened against us, to boot. You thumb thug, you emotionally stunted imbecile, do you feel strong and powerful now? Did you get all your angst out? Do you feel like a big man with a big ****? I am cowering, bowing down in the presence of how manly you are. You're so strong and wise. You are a real man, a man of all men, a man other men should model themselves after. So thank you. Thank you for helping me to see the error of my ways. What ever will I do to repay you? You speak the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Right?
Well I've got news for you, sorry to disappoint you, but you don't intimidate me, not one bit. All you do is remind me that we women have a long road ahead of us, a long way to go, a lot more to do, to not be demeaned, demoralized, treated like human beings of equal value without the threat of violence or intimidation, or like a vessel in which you may do as you please. "Kindness and human life"... pffft. The nerve of me, to care about the life of a man I never met, to feel sadness and sympathy and sorrow for him. We women, we are so callous. That's why we always vote in favour of equal human rights.
I will never leave the internet because of people like you, I will never bow down to people like you, and you will not silence my voice. We're 51% of the population. Without us there would be no more humans. Like it or not, the future human race needs both of us. We have to share this planet and co-exist, but guess what, we don't have to f*** you. We'll choose the other guys, the real men, the honourable ones that you are not. And you're pissed about that, aren't you? You're masking your rejection with hostility and intimidation, but it's not working, is it? Why does feminism still exist... because of people like you.
You know nothing about me. You know nothing about my "family", my "vagina", what I know, or what I have been through, but I know about you. I read, I research, I listen, I talk, I engage, and I think.
So this, "young man" is dedicated to you...
Other Men, Take Note: This is not directed towards you, the vast majority of good, decent, sane, level-headed, reasonable, and sometimes great men of the world, and of G@G. Nowhere in this will you see "all men..." or make any such broad-based generalizations or dismissive caricatures that demean all men. I assure you, I have the ability to distinguish between good and bad, and many people in between. However, there are some men, certain men, who act consistently and unnecessarily hostile, angry, aggressive, antagonistic, and who threaten or wish acts of violence like rape upon us, and it is them that this is about:
Hegemony: Leadership or dominance, especially by one state or social group, over others; The three main features of hegemony are leadership, power and dominance.
So, do you like my picture? How does it feel? Good, right? Someone's got to be on top, right? Law and order. Balance of power. Alpha-beta-omega, and all that shite. Leaders and followers. Doms and subs. Feminism is about power and taking over, taking control, right? 'An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth.' Do I believe in all this, abide by this? Go on, take a guess.
A large body of research has taken place identifying determinants of male perpetrated violence against women and developing interventions to reduce it. Despite these efforts, men's use of aggression against women remains prevalent. In a study sample of unmarried heterosexual men, Abbey, Parkhill, BeShears, Clinton-Sherrod, and Zawacki (2006) nearly 25% of participants reportedly perpetrated at least one act of attempted or completed rape. 10% of college men reported that they had physically aggressed against their most recent female dating partner at least once during their relationship (Luthra & Gidycz, 2006). Furthermore, estimates from national samples indicate that over 20% of heterosexual women report being physically assaulted by a husband or male cohabitating partner at some point in their lifetime (Tjaden & Thoennes, 2000). One factor pertinent to male-perpetrated aggression against women is the misogynistic attitudinal set of hostility toward women. A clear link exists between hostility toward women and subsequent aggression toward women.
Rape is a product of men's extreme adherence to a masculine gender role that encourages men to be dominant and “manly” and women to be passive and “feminine” (Murnen, Wright, & Kaluzny, 2002). Indeed, this view has been recognized for decades and is well articulated by Burt's (1980) conclusion that “rape is the logical and psychological extension of a dominant-submissive, competitive, sex role stereotyped culture.” Accordingly, pertinent theory suggests that male-perpetrated aggression against women is, in many cases, a product of socialization pressures to adhere to hegemonic masculinity (O'Neil, Helms, Gable, David, & Wrightsman, 1986). Hegemonic masculinity is a kind of masculinity that promotes male dominance over women (Connell, 2005; Smith & Kimmel, 2005). Specifically, Connell (2005) defines hegemonic masculinity as “the configuration of gender practice which embodies the currently accepted answer to the problem of the legitimacy of patriarchy, which guarantees (or is taken to guarantee) the dominant position of men and the subordination of women.” Prior research has explicitly suggested that the masculine gender role is not monolithic; rather that multiple “masculinities” and dimensions of those masculinities exist. Hence, it is not a unidimensional masculine gender role that is linked to violence, but rather specific types of masculinity.
A growing body of evidence suggests that men who hold traditional beliefs about the male gender role are at risk to experience stress in situations where this role is challenged (Cosenzo, Franchina, Eisler, & Krebs, 2004; Eisler, Franchina, Moore, Honeycutt, & Rhatigan, 2000; Franchina, Eisler, & Moore, 2001; Good et al., 1995). This tendency to experience gender-relevant stress is commonly referred to as masculine gender role stress (MGRS) (Eisler & Skidmore, 1987; Eisler, Skidmore, & Ward, 1988). Masculine gender role stress refers to men's tendency to experience negative psychological (e.g., insecurity, low self-esteem, increased anger) and physiological effects (e.g., increased cardiovascular reactivity and skin conductance) from their attempts to meet societally-based standards of the male role. Men who adhere to hegemonic masculine gender role guidelines expect others (e.g., women) to submit to these roles as well. Not surprisingly, masculine gender role stress has been directly associated with men's aggression against women (Copenhaver, Lash, & Eisler, 2000; Eisler et al., 2000; Franchina et al., 2001; Jakupcak et al., 2002; Moore et al., 2008). Importantly, evidence suggests that masculine gender role stress is a more direct predictor of men's behavior than specific norms of masculine ideologies (Thompson, Pleck, & Ferrera, 1992). As such, it should follow that masculine gender role stress influences or accounts for the relation between pertinent norms of hegemonic masculinity and aggression toward women. Indeed, research has found that endorsement of hegemonic male gender role beliefs predicted aggression against women among men who also reported high levels of masculine gender role stress (Jakupcak et al., 2002).
This data is supported by relevant theories in the violence against women literature. For instance, men who manifest insecure and defensive feelings in their relationships with women may use sexual aggression to regain their sense of power and control (Malamuth, Sockloskie, Koss, & Tanaka, 1991; Malamuth et al., 1995). Accordingly, sexual aggression may act to offset any perceived masculinity threat (e.g., personal inferiority) these men may feel. Similarly, men may develop hostile attitudes toward women and aggress against them as a way to attenuate feelings of personal weakness and uncertainty and, ultimately, to displace their state of stressful discontent (Cowan & Mills, 2004). From this, it is reasonable to contend that masculine gender role stress reflects men's tendency to experience the insecurity, defensiveness, personal weakness, and stressful discontent that may be a central motivation for hostility and aggression toward women.
In other words, when these subgroups of men experience gender-relevant stress, attitudinally “lashing out” toward women may function to manage or reduce this stress. This finding is consistent with pertinent literature indicating that men's hostility and aggression toward women functions to reaffirm their sense of dominance and power (Cowan & Mills, 2004; Malamuth et al., 1991; Malamuth, et al., 1995). Thus, hostility and aggression toward women presumably alleviates feelings (e.g., insecurity, defensiveness, personal weakness, stressful discontent) that are posited to comprise state gender role stress (Cowan & Mills, 2004; Malamuth et al., 1991; Malamuth et al., 1995). It should be noted that all men, regardless of the extent to which they subscribe to different masculinities, may encounter gender-relevant situations and experience gender-relevant stress in these situations. Nevertheless, the present findings suggest that men who subscribe to these norms of hegemonic masculinity are more prone to experience gender role stress, a greater intensity of gender role stress, and to cope with that stress in ways that reassert male dominance over women (e.g., hostile attitudes toward women).
Much progress has been made to foster egalitarian relationships between men and women; consequently, men who still believe in the dominance of the male gender may harbor hostile attitudes toward women because they feel their control over women is declining.
So, The 3 Main Takeaways Are:
1. Hegemonic masculine gender role norms have been linked to men's physical and sexual aggression against women (Copenhaver et al., 2000; Eisler et al., 2000; Franchina et al., 2001; Jakupcak et al., 2002; Moore et al., 2008; O'Neil et al., 1986)
2. Stress men feel when they encounter violations of the traditional male role contributes to the development of hostile and domineering attitudes toward women (Malamuth et al., 1995).
3. Men who espouse a “tough” persona endorse hostile attitudes toward women, and hostile attitudes toward other men, for that matter, regardless of their sensitivity to gender-relevant threats.
In layman's terms - they're acting hostile because they feel weak and inferior.