5 Tips To Tell If Your Guy’s Lying

5 Tips To Tell If Your Guy’s Lying

All humans have innate intuition. Yet no one’s cornered the market on this gift better than women. We may not know why we don’t believe what our guy’s telling us, but something about what he’s saying or how he’s saying it just doesn’t add up. We feel it.

How far do you want to go to figure out the truth? If it’s a case of presumed infidelity, you need to know. But what about the smaller things that he says (or doesn’t say) that bother you? Picking your battles is a question each woman must decide for herself.

5 Tips To Tell If Your Guy’s Lying

There will be times we all want to alter or omit information. Telling the “whole truth” can lead to unnecessary upset and unwanted arguments. Day in and day out, we all submit to our own little lies to protect someone’s feelings, whether it’s turning down a movie with a friend or making an excuse for something we don’t want to do.

Honesty is wonderful when managed with tact, diplomacy and wisdom. Brutal honesty is often a double-edged sword. It allows for complete transparency and ideally forges a closer bond. But humans have underlying insecurities and fears that can easily alter one’s best intentions when “telling all.” What should be an honestly stated and understandable scenario can quickly turn to something harmful.

5 Tips To Tell If Your Guy’s Lying

Here’s are 5 tips to decode lying:

Elaboration: Novice’s use elaboration. They tell their story in great detail… like you might if you had to tell your boss why you were late. “So, why didn’t you pick up the phone last night?” you might ask. You hear an elaborate story filled with unexpected events and dramatic factors. A litany of details is a dead give away that it’s a lie.

Eyes shift to the left: Before concocting a story a liar will shift their eyes to the left. This is an old-school “tell.” It means he’s thinking of an excuse. When trying to remember an event we shift our eyes up and to the right.

Evasion/Deflection: He has to leave. Can’t talk about it now. Has to make a call or late for an appointment. It’s the guy version of running away.

The Turn-around: He shifts the questioning to you. He asks where you were or whom you were with, accuses or attacks you.

Omission: He answers your question, but only in part. He says enough to satisfy you, but you sense there’s more. He may admit he went out drinking with his buddies, but omits the part about the strip club at the end of the night and the lap dance. Not because he did anything to harm you but because saying this will upset you and possibly start a fight.

5 Tips To Tell If Your Guy’s Lying

Guys have been taught to lie. From the first time a baseball went through the neighbor’s window to what happened with their dad’s car, telling the truth has come with a guaranteed punishment.

So maybe the better set of questions to ask is how comfortable do you make him in telling you the truth? If you want a guy to feel safe to tell you the truth, you have to set a template for this new reality. You’d need to listen. Hold back on the judgment and just let him speak. Short of sleeping with your best friend, most guys lie to keep the peace in a relationship. Let him talk, and try to hear what he’s saying. You might not like what you hear but you’ll have set the stage for honest communication. And, you’ll have valuable information.

The more men fear our response, the less truth they’ll tell us. The more they feel they can tell us the truth without dramatic fights and verbal abuse, the safer they’ll feel to tell us the truth when asked. You can’t work on fixing a problem if you don’t know what’s going on. The truth will give you the information you need to make a true assessment of the situation and your subsequent actions.

5 Tips To Tell If Your Guy’s Lying

As seen on OPRAH, best-selling author/relationship expert Susan Winter (Allowing Magnificence and Older Women/Younger Men) specializes in evolutionary forms of loving partnership and higher thinking. She writes, speaks and coaches on accessing our inherent perfection in life and love. Media credits include: THE TODAY SHOW, GOOD MORNING AMERICA, ABC/CBS/NBC EVENING NEWS, CNN, COSMO, HARPERS BAZAAR, PEOPLE, GOOD HOUSEKEEPING, NEW YORK MAGAZINE, THE LONDON TIMES, THE NEW YORK TIMES and THE HUFFINGTON POST. In radio Susan is a frequent guest on NPR, ABC, PLAYBOY NETWORK (Sirius Radio), and CBS News Radio.

5 Tips To Tell If Your Guy’s Lying
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Most Helpful Girl

  • Azara

    i dont sees why this is directed at women about men. people lie and people want to know when they are being lied to. it should just be directed at everyone.

    and yes you want to be calm but being calm doesn't mean its ok someone is lying just bc they thought you need that. thats disrespectful out doesn't matter if they thought you needed to be patronized.

Most Helpful Guy

  • martyfellow

    Yes, being honest when someone's feelings are hurt can lead to unpredictable, vindictive or even violent behavior as a response. Why inflict pain by telling everything, when discretion won't harm anyone!

    In an ideal world, when people would take this advice and listen without judgment, people would feel more confident about telling the truth

What Girls & Guys Said

  • MannMitAntworten

    Eyes shifting to the left was determined to be a false indicator. Studies performed that those telling the truth looked left in equal proportions to those who lied and looked right. It is a absolutey false indicator. It was so believed that we were taught to watch for it when in interrogation. Filming then watching their body language when reviewing the video later actually is a better indicator when you know what to look for.

    Someone trained for deceit and understands other tools of measure with a high level of 'control' countrrmeasure can however easily go undetected. Sometimes telling 'purposeful' lies can effect a desired outcome of the or being questioned.

    Anyway, as a another respondent noted, not sure why this is directed at men as 'people' lie. Not just men. Absolutely correct. .

    Learn to ask questions as a lawyer - know they correct smswer before you ask. Them allow them to answer. Try not to inteript them and allow th to finish then ask more questions. Lies give answers too.

    Finally, some look neither left or right... which can indicate something else.

  • Finchie40

    From my experiences in life Girls lie way more then guys do but again it. just comes down to what kind of person you are. Girls gossip a lot more then guys do and most Girls r filled with drama they live off of that shit , when i worked as a bouncer at a night club i couldnt believe all the cheating wives and girlfriends that were coming in there very rarely a husband or boyfriend was in there cheating , we bad more husbands and boyfriends coming to look for their cheating wives or girlfriends , and we busted so many it was sick , Hot saying guys dont cheat but from my experiences in life Girls sank the highest , Girls Night out is way Worse then Guys Night out. Word of advice if ypur girl is going out for Girls night out a lot more then likely she is cheating on you if a girl is in love with u she would find really no desire to go out without including you, when you are in a relationship you should never exclude your partner when u start excluding that means you only really care about yourself and not. really thinking about what your partner is thinking , selfishness is the biggest relationship killer period

  • Tdieseler

    THE truth becomes OUR truth...
    "does this dress make my hips look big" she asks
    "yes" he says (truth)
    "oh so YOU think Im fat huh", she retorts
    (cue drama)
    @cantsaylol @Bysshe @DanAG and they wonder why we lie

  • esotericstory

    This superior female intuition is really something that ha ruined relationships for me. Women kept looking for things that did not exist, their so called amazing female intuition was just paranoia. I dont deal with crazy women so I break things of with them.

  • Bananaman177

    "All humans have innate intuition. Yet no one’s cornered the market on this gift better than women. We may not know why we don’t believe what our guy’s telling us, but something about what he’s saying or how he’s saying it just doesn’t add up. We feel it."

    Wow, you mean your intuition is never wrong? Or you just never bother to factcheck it?

  • Azara

    saying its a guy thing excuses it in mashy ways.

    attributing behavior problems to a persons sex interferes with the ability to remain objective about the fact its ongoing. and how to solve it.

  • Azara

    an adult is not a kid lying to their parents. if you're continuously lying to your partner to keep peace you should revaluate your behavior.

    lying isn't a guy thing. its a thing a lot of people do to protect themselves and its a poor calculation.

  • Adelphïné

    You know the old joke: how can you tell if a guy's lying? His lips are moving. lol
    Free book: "Woman to Women" @ smashwords. com/books/view/938595 🌟

    • yowsa

      That's actually a joke about lawyers and politicians...

  • Roarke

    if this 'woman' ever had even the slightest inkling of physical contact with her 'guy' prior to entering into a mutually binding legal contract of marriage with him, then she is amoral. this renders any test of him invalid.

  • itsme_goodsamaritan

    I am going to follow your advice next time I interact with him. Its my concern for me which makes me interrupt him while he's speaking. Looks like its backfiring on me. Thanks for ur tips:)

  • BattyBB

    I needed this over a year ago :P
    I hope I can remember for the next time someone *does* lie to me

  • Thatsamazing

    Um... the eye-shifting thing has been debunked many times. And this Take is sexist, idiotic nonsense written by someone who is sexist and idiotic.

  • Browneye57

    "All humans have innate intuition." Bullshit. Some are dumber than rocks.
    If you don't like men then don't date them. Your outlook is a pisser.

  • cantsaylol

    Lol isn't this what women do?
    Such a biased article
    Cmon now..

    • NoDoubt

      Just like not all men do this, not all women do this. But yeah, some people of both genders do this. I have seen my stepmom do this more than once when she runs off to another city "for a break"

    • cantsaylol

      Sorry to hear, that's awful

  • If you are so mistrustful of men, don't date them. I say this for men too. It's not ALL men and it's not ALL women, it's your own messed up experiences. Stop generalizing.

  • If you stop trusting your partner, your "intuition" will ruin the relationship because you're just looking for problems where there doesn't need to be.

  • Bysshe

    Elaboration and omission are both problems... so we need to say exactly the right amount or she'll think I'm lying?

  • PinkSummerSunsets

    Thank you for the tips. I plan to take better notice of things now

  • LoverOfTheAges

    So this "expert" claims, "Guys have been taught to lie." That is sexist, and I resent that.

  • AdamThomas

    One tip to tell if your girlfriend is lying:
    1. Her lips are moving

  • anametouse

    Ahhhhh shit Susan whats up. Subcribed to your youtube channel

  • bossplaya

    It's because you women are to gulable and you all need to be independent

  • Trustme_Im-lying

    Oh good article. I learned a lot, Good Job!

  • DanAG

    Sounds like a total load of crap.

  • worldscolide

    This is true of both genders not just guys... smh

  • Niceguyscumlast

    Good article my daughters need to read this.

  • HereIbe

    How to tell if a woman is lying:

    She's talking.

  • Pejtu

    Thank you for the tips how to be a better liar

  • yowsa

    Innate inborn instinctive intuition!

  • BertMacklinFBI

    sounds good.

  • Secretgardenblood

    Good take

  • Amazing tips

  • Anonymous

    Another perfect example of, woman writing about man and other women take it as holy true.

    Most of those points goes to man or woman...

    That part where you write, about braking glass with ball, sounds very sexist as you imply that all men been brought up as liers, that even sounds of feminazi BS.

  • Anonymous

    One tip to tell if your girl is lying:

    Her lips are moving

  • Anonymous

    “No ones cornered the market on this gift better than women”
    Well no one thinks they have more than women... funny how tips still need to be given, ay?

    Basically this is brilliant advice for how to stir shit.