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What I’ve Come To Realize Over 30+ Guys (Page 2)
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Statisticaly race is apparently a bigger issue for women than for men so I suspect that perception may be self fulfilling/projection. Other than that a pretty good first draft. It's a shame your future is ao bleak and lonely though.
I know what I experienced. And I've actually seen statistics that said my combination of gender and race (black woman) were least desired.
If you have a source for your first sentence, send it. Otherwise your gaslighting attempts were fruitless.
Sure www.mit.edu/~6.s085/papers/racialPreferences.pdf
"We first look at the decisions of female subjects. For all races except Asians, all the coef-ficients on the race indicator variables are negative, implying a same-race preference... For male subjects, the coefficients on racial preferences are predominantly negative but are not jointly significant at 5% for any race... Thus on average, women exhibit stronger racial preferences than men."
Interesting. I definitely learned something new then. However, I don't see where it says that racial preferences in men are nonexistent. Just because there is more racial preference among women than men doesn't mean race doesn't also matter to men.
To quote myself "apparently a BIGGER issue for women than for men".
In an "and logic" decision the lower common denominator is the one that matters.
We could factor in arranged marriages which take womens racial preferences out of the equation and increase diversity/equality 🤣. But that'd be trolling.
Yes you're right you did say that. However you also said "I suspect that perception may be self fulfilling/projection" to "I am of color and I have had far more dating options in diverse areas than in predominantly white areas. Race does matter. We hate to say it but people do have race preferences. Some people are far more likely to date someone of their own race than of different races. Less than 20% of the guys on my list weren't of color and only one of them had I actually had a relationship with." correct?
In order for what I said to be considered mere imagination the racial preference among men would have to be considered low, if not nonexistant. But your source actually says racial preference is high (given that I'm pretty sure women are more often than men the reason for this).
Your source actually even confirms what I said about black females: "we also find that black females receive significantly lower ratings relative
to whites". Along with these other two sources:
www.gwern.net/.../raceandattraction20092014.html
qz.com/.../
But I think the problem here is that I'm technically coming from the worser end of the stick. If I am an African American woman and African American woman are least desired out of all other female races than that must mean people generally don't experience as much of the same thing. Not everyone sees what I am seeing, that must be why that point might rub untrue to some folks. It is definitely true for at least any other African American women though.
"Mere imagination"? That's not what self fulfilling means. It means when you say "I have had far more dating options" what you consider an option may not be the totality of options that objectively exist.
I took "self fulfilling/projection" to mean imagination lol
I would be interested to see if this persists outside of the US too. This could be something specific to African American women culturally rather than black women racially for example.
OHH I see what you're saying now. You're saying that because women have a stronger racial preference than men and that source proves people like to be with the same race, I may be the cause of a low amount of options.
Sorry I thought you were discrediting the fact there is a low amount of options.
It could be. I'm not sure though. In the black-white relationship I had I initiated things.
I think this wouldn't be the case in African countries of course. I'm not sure about others though. America is supposed to be a "melting pot".
Are you implying I should go to Africa? >:(
No I am implying you should ask out more white guys 🤣
Or maybe pretend to be first generation 🤷
Haha I'm just playing. Maybe I should though. I kind of stopped asking guys out. I do still initiate things though.
Thinking about it myself now. I would be reluctant to date an African American woman whereas an African, Caribbean or black european woman is as appealing to me as any other. Though I am a sample size of 1 and I cannot tell if that is entirely because of my reluctance to date American women in general.
Sorry but not all men are like this and you shouldn't generalize them ( women hate this right 🤔) I do agree with a couple of your statements though. Please don't lump us all together.
She did say this was her personal experience of all 30 guys had in trait. Not all men in general.
Yeah trust me im not. But it would also be dumb not to keep these things in mind.
You do realize these cam be applied to women too
your right in what you say for you but not right in all you said for others ,, we are all different people men and woman ,, if i took every woman to be like my x the human race would be extinct, so now we are not all the same but your ideas and what you know are for you alone.
This cracks me up !!! Now, if I had done something like this for women then I would have been from hell.
It takes a bad relationship or two to gain this kind of wisdom and I agree on every point. I hope some younger women take notice of this and take it to heart.
I agree with a lot of these but number 1 I think is bad advice
It honestly depends on what you define as early. Early to me was as early as inviting him back home the day I met him once even. I was young and dumb
I think anything within the span of at least 3 days from meeting him is too early no matter how close you've grown within those 3 days.
Well maybe not give sex too early but giving time and attention early on isn’t bad I think
It is if it's a lot I still think. In my experience, guys I texted back fast and often within the first 3 days eventually ghosted for example.
Hmmmm I don't know I’ve noticed that for me I can actually seem to tell whether or not I’d date a girl just after an hour of knowing them or even less.
Spot on baby. Is your mom available and as smart as you? 🙂
Hahahaha 😂 nah but I am 👀
Then now onwards you're mine ♥️
Thanks for like!
I can relate to the Man Cave XD that's definitely me
I learned the hard way 💀
Solid points. I can’t argue with any of them. Not applicable in all cases but most.
Wow, a long and well-thought-out post. Thank you.
Most of these go both ways, because it's more human nature than it is exclusive to any gender, but even still this was a very insightful read. Well done.
As a full-time single parent, I care about chemistry and common free time. Everything else is negotiable.
Now do women? Cause I’d say I can relate a little.
hmm im not sure about women as a majority but I can tell you whats true for me
1. They never appreciated what was given too easily. Not the case for me
2. They LOVE genuine compliments. Yeah I can relate
3. Looks matter. Demeanor matters. Race matters too. look and demeanor matter to me, idc about race
4. There needs to be some space. yes as long as its not too much
5. Seriously space is very important.
6. Comfort early isn't always a good thing. if im comfortable early yeah its not a good thing.
7. They're horny beings. yeah im not as horny
8. They pull away when mad. well.. im more of a fighty type so.. yes im the annoying woman that sends books when mad
9. If he actually cares, he'll listen to what you want. of course this is the case for me
10. They don't want a women with a supreme amount of experience. as long as he is serious about me and not trying to make me another body count
11. They use excuses. Eh. there's only been one time I used an excuse. and it didn't work I ended up straight up having to tell the guy I want interested.
12. You shouldn't ignore how you feel.
13. You should watch out for patterns. yeah im capable of patterns
14. If there really was chemistry, there's a decent chance they'll come back. nah I rarely go back to people. once I've move on unless you come back to me first I usually dont think to go back to you
Your list is ok. You can tell that its written from a teenage girl perspective but in my opinion you're accurate on a few things. You also give great insight into what goes on inside the mind of a woman.
Was expecting something a little different, but this is fairly straightforward and pretty good. A couple critiques here and there, but that could just be the types of guys you were seeing.
Of course there's more reasoning, but for the amount of effort put into this, this checks out from a guy.
What I've realized after hitting 30. Many many many women seem to have daddy issues
Huh? What do you mean daddy issues?
Do you mean, Daughters being raised with no fathers in their life causing them to behave in a toxic way causing them to have toxic relationship-type daddy issues?
I'm a guy and I can confirm that all of these are accurate for me except number 1 lol
Wait, is this simply you telling us about your personal experiences or are you saying that you believe most are like that?
kind of? im really saying like over my experiences around at least 70% of the time these were the cases
How many men were they?
30+. I'm probably forgetting some which is why I added the +
Ah, I wasn't sure if that was referring to their age.
So is your conclusion that that's how guys generally are, and those who aren't are merely exceptions?
Nope. Like I said, this was just the case for the guys on my list who are from a younger age group.
Alrighty
These days men are rejected because of how sexist western society dictates women in the degenerate post-9/11 world
I honestly feel like women are starting to be rejected more. or at least I am.. :')
I don't reject women based on attraction. It may be what many men (and women) are doing to each other, but I'm old-school. I reject only if the girl's personality is not so good or if she is a narcissist or takes drugs or is a communist
For example if a girl customer around my age came to me asking for my number after she was satisfied with my service, I wouldn't be hesitant to give my number out. Most girls treat me like shit these days, sometimes they'll make excuses as to why they don't even WANT TO BE MY FRIEND. And I do emphasize friend, because contrary to popular belief, opposite-sex friendships aren't always romantic or friends with benefits
Awwwh thats nice
I wish there were more guys like you. I like your idea of giving women a chance
Tbh I can't stand redpill/blackpill society. Shaming women just because they are single moms or made a mistake in the past
Yeah. It makes me really scared to end up in those situations