Why does it feel like there is no girl out there for me?

[brunohusker]

It honestly feels like there is no girl out there. I go to a college with 4000 kids and its 55% female yet it seems as if a lot of the girls I know are taken or just too attractive for me. While I am a bit bigger (5 ft 7 225) people tell me I'm okay looking, and while I am quiet I think I have an okay personality, but its weird there are certainly girls I think are cute, but none that are like "wow I just have to go out with her or else". Its not a big deal because I want to finish school, but I am 21 years old and never had a girlfriend or a date and the two really cute girls I asked out both said no. Anyways any advice would help, I mean should I even be worried at all?

Updates

+1 y

plus did I fail to mention that no ones "personality" interested me I mean hot girls are a dime a dozen, a girl with a great personality is a little more difficult (but not impossible) to find.

Updates

+1 y

well lets see I have worked out everyday since January and started at 230, and it seems that I've hit a rut after 220, plus my family is just full of bigger people, and its not like I'm a complete fat ass, I look big but not 220 lbs big

[Anonymous]

Like anything in life the more you try and work at something the better your results.

I know that rejection isn't fun, but simply asking 2 girls out? C'mon you gotta do better then that. I'd aim to be asking 2 girls out a week. The more you do it the less nervous and more natural you get. Try googling "cocky funny", it's an interesting technique that a lot of people talk about (there are even books/etc if you want to get that hardcore into it)

[brunohusker]

Look, this cocky funny thing sounds like a gimmick, and I want to get girls by being myself. Also how am I supposed to ask 2 girls per week out, I mean I want to get to know them to see if their a match, not just randomly ask some aquaintance out. I wanna take my time with a girl. I don't wanna be some manwhore at a club asking out tons of girls and getting rejected, I wanna find that one girl

[Opinion Owner]

And how are you going to get to know girls better? Why, by asking them out for a coffee to talk!

Yeah you can call the "cocky funny" thing a gimmick, but I see it as a way to help people be more outgoing and give them some confidence/practice at approaching girls (some guys don't need it, some do).

There is nothing wrong with trying to find that one girl, but you've gotta put yourself out there more (especially if you want the process to go quicker).

[brunohusker]

What does that mean, put myself out there, I'm out and about people see me around, I have friends, I'm not just some fatass loser sitting around playing WOW and eating 5 bags of cheetoes I get out, I mean even just being around campus I am "out"

[Opinion Owner]

When I say out there I don't mean you are physically standing around in public hoping some girl is going to randomly start talking to you. You still have to take the initiative. You still have to approach girls, talk to them and ask them out. Yes you run the risk of being turned down, but you won't know unless you try. That's putting yourself out there in my opinion.

[brunohusker]

Okay I understand, but that's the point of this question, there seems like there is no one worth my time. No one that would make me come out of my shell and talk to them , like I said there are some that are interesting, but none that I really want to go out with, also it sucks because living in rural nebraska, half of all girls here are engaged by 21 and the rest by 25 so the odds seemed stacked against me.

[Opinion Owner]

I can tell you what your problem is, your attitude.

"there seems like there is no one worth my time"

You present that holier-than-thou attitude to any girl and they aren't going to give you the time of day. How do you even know that a girl isn't worth your time? Because she's not super cute? I'm starting to see why you've never had a date.

Ever heard the expression "never judge a book by its cover"? Trust me, the best girls are not the super hot 10's.

[brunohusker]

No its not that I'm shallow, its that no one has ever made me feel like I want to date them, its not like I'm some pig whose overlooks girls who are "perfect 10's" I mean the girls I tried to ask out were great because of their personality, and yes I thought they were good looking,but you ask most people they would say they were average, in fact its the opposite, its that I'm too ugly, I mean I'm 5 ft 8 220 and I just feel like no one would want me, but also I don't want to sette

[Opinion Owner]

So you're 5ft 8 and 220? What are you going to do about it? Sit around and feel sorry for yourself or start changing your life to be the person you want to be?

[DBartolini]

Hey man, the right girl will come a long sometime. All kinds of girls have crushes on me just for what I look like, but once they find out I am a Catholic who is not into partying, sex and drugs, it turns them away. I found the girl of my dreams on a cruise back in the summer we have seen each other 2 times since and we talk on webcam. The long distance hurts but there is always some one out there, you'll meet her when you least expect it.

[brunohusker]

You sound a lot like me in a way, I'm also catholic, and not into drugs and sex, and partying, and I hang with people who aren't but they are all taken! I mean it seems like there is no one who is out there that I find attractive, all the single people I know that are my age are wierd, so it just makes me feel like I am wierd. I hope I will find someone though

[Omgitsnatalie09]

Honestly, to me I think there is always someone that comes around in life. Maybe its just not your time to have a girl right now. Maybe a special someone would come along eventually. and a lot of girls can be hurtful by judging on how guys look. In my opnion it really doesn't matter to me on how the guy looks.

[kevlar]

Argggh I hate hearing this. It's like damn, I've been waiting years for this 'someone'. Where is she? It's like time has slowed ever since I've been wanting her and needing her...

[Omgitsnatalie09]

She will come along trust me [=

[Alexxxx57]

Any luck? Also I agree with everyone else. Confidence and timing. Having a girlfriend in college isn’t worth it mate but time consuming. I just recently got rejected over the summer from a beauty but she couldn’t handle school and college. Just live your life to the fullest women will start to notice and take interest. If you do want one check out bumble or tinder. It’s a start mate. Good luck on finding that special someone! I’m still looking too so don’t feel your the only one.