Why does my husband's friend stare at me?

[Anonymous]

the first time I seen him looking and me he was getting dress to go to the club with my husband but my husband was up stairs getting ready, and another time is when he came over to pick up his son he sit down and lean back and had his shirt up and it was showing his stomach then he started to talk about sex my husband and him been friend for a long time and I never heard him talk like that ,then another time I was out shopping and I saw him and he stop and said what's up o you out here shopping while he's at home sleeping and I sad yes than grab my hand and said by, then just this Sunday he came over to drop off my son and he ask me were is your husband and I said he is asleep , I started to clean my living room and he just was standing there I guess watching me than I said can you move so I can clean over there and he only move over a little so I need help I told my husband but he act like he don't want to hear it .i don't know if my husband is out there cheating on me and he so caught up out there that he not paying any mind to what his friend it trying to do

[matthewm]

Hmmm. Interesting. Not only do I think that that man was being overly-flirtatious with you, I also think that your husband couldn't care less about that face. Unfortunately, my usual advice in this situation would be to talk to your husband about it. Seeing as you already have and he has shown such a nonchalant attitude about it, I would suggest that you do some investigating... try to figure out what's going on here. It seems like there are two things that you need to be looking into. 1) Why this guy seems to show such an interest in you and 2) why your husband doesn't really care about it.

Your husband... does he normally show such a lack of interest in your daily activities? If he's normally this oblivious or usually misses this much detail, it may not even be out of the ordinary, but if the guy's pretty smart, I can't say that I would be happy with the response that you got from him.

So, bottom line: Figure out what's going on with you husband (even if it isn't anything big, it seems to me like you feel hurt by what he said or did). Then, I would move on to this new guy and see what's up with him.

[Asker]

My husband he as a very bad temper so when I told him and he don't react like I thought he would I got very upset, he only do it when my husband not around and I know that a 4yr ago my husband said that he had seen some naked pic of me but this was years ago

[matthewm]

Well, I think that you should definitely do some investigating. I'm not positive that there's a "conspiracy" going on, but I think that there are definitely things that you need to clear up.... and I mean need, not want. There's something rotten in Denmark (something fishy going on).

[sunshine2]

i cannot believe the lack of attention your husband is showing in this kind of situation. he is either in denial because its his friend, he thinks your just making unnecesaary fuss to get his attention, or he made a deal with his friend or something.

this is really creppy behavior and maybe you should confront him about it. how long has this been happening?

[Asker]

He as been doing this for 3yr

[sunshine2]

Omg. I am so suprised. maybe your husband has gotten used to it. but really, that's creepy. you really need to have a serius talk to him, and be like "i am not married to your, or your fantasies, and am not in the least interested in you. I am married to my husband, your friend!" how long have you been married?

[Asker]

I have been married for 11yrs

[Anonymous]

He is fantasising about you...

[Asker]

And some time I find myself fantasising about him to but I don't show him some time it seem like he get nevours around me