Did I lose my chance with him? And can I regain his interest?

[222_k]

So this guy I have a crush on tried pursuing me about 5 months ago and he was coming off strong. Things were good and really flirty and we had a lot of good deep conversations (we have a lot in common) and he would ask me to hang out a lot, but I only agreed to once because I was nervous to. (That one time was decent and we got coffee and talked.) This type of thing continued for about 3 months and then he stopped texting me, flirting, and asking to hang out. (Maybe because I didn't agree to hang that much I sent the wrong message? Idk)
I feel like it could've became something more but it didn't- it just sort of stopped. I feel like it's my fault for not taking the opportunity as I said I only agreed to hang w him once. Now he's back at having a thing w this girl he used to have a thing w (prior to pursuing me) and I feel like I totally had the chance to have him but it slipped from me. Why do you think he stopped going for me? Because he wanted to go back to the other girl or did he lose interest in me? Either way, is there a way I can gain his interest again and get a flirty relationship back btwn us? We still occasionally talk but it's in a friend way, so is there a way I can use that as a basis to start flirting again? I wouldn't mind making the first move as I said we still kinda talk, as long as it's not too bold. Or is it hopeless to try and rekindle what we had?

[XRabbitHeartX]

"Why do you think he stopped going for me? Because he wanted to go back to the other girl or did he lose interest in me? "

You answered your own question there. It's like one of these or a combination of these.

if he and this girl aren't serious or in a relationship, you can still try to flirt with him subtly. Ask him out for coffee, see how he responds and then take it from there. You have to take chances when it comes to love, so just do it. One the actual date, be friendly with some flirtation but remember he is dating another girl too so don't get your hopes up.

[anzcukz]

He definitely lost interest in you because of not seeing you much. Guys need to hangout with a person for that flirty spark to continue and for the guys interest to
Actually grow from being around you more. So I would most certainly ask
Him to chill and show initiative and interest in him again and the feelings would most certainly come back. He's only talking to that other girl now because maybe she's giving him the attention you never gave him

[222_k]

I see what you're saying, thanks for the advice! So what's the best way to ask him to chill without it being too random? And should I try to make it come off as a chill friend thing?

[anzcukz]

At first you need to make it seem like a chill friend thing so you can like ease into shit again , that way it won't be random. Then after u guys chill 2 times , see the vibes and if it went well and if u guys clicked and shit and then start up the flirty shit again and see how he takes it. You shud text him more and then more opportunities will open up where u can then ask him to chill. Be like oh if you're free let's grab a coffee sometime , like he won't say no

[mrinalashesh007]

i guess u spooked him away.. coz of ur over cautious nature in this relationship sorta.. u thought it cud be something more and fearing that i guess.. u slipped.. now he lost interest coz he saw u were not interested anymore.. so he kinda got away.. now he is back w this girl u talking... n he is getting those things from her in a proper way.. so u would he ask u out again?

but then.. u still might hv a chance with him.. go talk to him.. meet him in person.. tell him ur avl now.. n i hope he chooses to stay for a date at least.. go for him.. all d best!

[222_k]

Thanks for the advice! So I should talk to him more but in a less cautious way?

[mrinalashesh007]

Yes.. talk to him.. be specific while speaking about what you want.. but then.. no desperate measures.. he can't be the only one lol!😊

[Anonymous]

From a guys perspective, if a girl doesn't want to hang out it probably means she's not that into you. He probably thought he was going to far and throttled back. The other girl probably gave him more of a green light so he pursued her instead

[mrinalashesh007]

Agreed..

[222_k]

Makes sense. So at this point, is there a way I could show interest or ask to hang without coming off too strong?

[Opinion Owner]

Just do it, don't worry about coming off too strong. That's probably why you're in the situation you're in now. You were too conservative

[mrinalashesh007]

yes u cn str8way call him.. ask him.. what's up.. n then carry ur conversation to the point where u can ask him out.. well u must not sound desperate.. but then u hv to ask him. if he is interested in going out.. or u cn message him as well.. though I won't like messages.. but still u may ask.. u well know how to interact.. so.. good luck!

[222_k]

So would it be best to start a conversation with him and if the chance comes up, ask him to hang or grab coffee? From a guys perspective, would that send enough of a message that I'm interested without being to over the top?

[mrinalashesh007]

yes sure.. tht would wrk

[Opinion Owner]

To me that sounds like you just want to be friends

[222_k]

From a guys perspective what's a good approach from a girl? I don't want to seem like just a friend but I want to ease into it

[mrinalashesh007]

Well u don't need to friendzone him.. that's it.. u clearly need to set a buzz that u r available!

[Opinion Owner]

Just be honest. Men aren't as subtle as women. A lot of things women do blow over our heads