Why would a guy want to kiss a girl on the cheek?

[Anonymous]

This guy and I, we've slept together a couple of times, we wanted to date, but then we realised we're not a good match and we keep on fighting. Now we've decided to just be friends, no benefits. So I told him if we're just friends without benefits, then he shouldn't touch me (spank my ass, caress my arm, my shoulder, kiss me on the cheek, those things). But today lately he's been insisting on giving me a kiss goodbye on my cheek. Which is something we've never done even when we were wanting to date each other. Only now that we're platonic he decided to start kissing me on the cheek? It got to the point where he sneaked a kiss (because I kept refusing). Wtf? Why?

[Phil_]

Seeing your relation I think it's a sign of affection... Though, in my culture, a kiss on the cheek is a mere greeting, which happen just after saying hello or goodbye (between M/F colleagues for example)... it's so casual that one may have to actively decline in order to avoid it...
I don't think that's the same here, maybe that's his way to stay close to you, it may even enact that things have been settled for him, because you didn't do that when you were closer...
Or, as other opinions stated, there's a "feeling of possession" issue... which is worse, of course...
Anyway, he must respect your decision to refuse it...

[marwan1993]

Everyone on here gives u the same bullshit advice. No. Listen up.

He is in need for love, but not neccesarily sex. He might want to feel a strong connection with someone.

You should get along and give him a kiss on the cheek back. Don't make a big deal out of it.

[Asker]

he does feel a strong connection to me. I don't want the kiss or the touching because there has to be boundaries.

[marwan1993]

That's stupid. U jump in bed with him but thinj a kiss on the cheek is going to far...

[Asker]

it's all in what is agreed upon. phases. we've had phases in which we've fucked. Now he wants that phase to be temporarily "suspended". so that's my condition. If we're not fucking, then we;'re normal friends and normal friends don't slap each other's butts or kiss on the cheek

[marwan1993]

You're right.

[DaisyBSwan]

Sounds like something my friend is going through. The guy doesn't want a commitment and says he just wants to be friends, but he also doesn't want *her* seeing anyone else so he'll do little things in an attempt to keep her on a hook. You need to set boundaries or this behavior will continue or get worse and cause major problems as it did with my friend. He needs to behave like your other guy friends (hands and mouth to himself). If he can't do that then he doesn't respect you and he's not worth keeping around.

[saltwater84]

I think he is lost lol
tell him that you both needs to calm down , and that you want a relationship. Either way it will serve you because it will make him stop trying to kiss you , or he will be like 'yes some clarity! and will hop in the relationship with you.

I think he likes you and can't help himself to be around you because he likes you

[Anonymous]

A kiss on the cheek can be seen as just chivalry, although it does hint at him wanting something more. If you don't like it because it'll make you develop unwise feelings then just be clear with him about this and stick to your guns, at least then he'll know why and if he's decent he'll respect it.

[Opinion Owner]

Just don't let him pressure you into friends with benefits if that's not what you want.

[dkings]

Probably because he's chivalrous. Something you obviously don't understand. Although not seen often in many modern cultures, a kiss on the cheek can bee seen as an action of greeting, goodbye, or even affection. Even IF it is a kiss of affection, you should be able to decipher the type of affection. For example, a good friend may give a platonic kiss of affection. Your father may give you a kiss of affection. If you're now platonic, don't think anything of it.

[Asker]

not just the kiss, but he also snuck a butt slap and a hug/cuddle/dry hump thing too last night. Sure, he's playing around, but why does he even want to do it? When he doesn't want to fuck me? I threw myself at him and he doesn't want to take the offer. Then why sneak these things around?

[dkings]

Well... knowing that... A better question you should be asking yourself is... WHY are you even hanging around this dude anymore? If you got an itch to scratch, forget about him and find someone who will scratch it for you. Also, what he is doing COULD be a form of possession. A possessive man will do exactly what he is, just to keep you around as a fallback. Do you honestly want to degrade your value like that?

[Asker]

Because I actually like hanging out with him. We actually don't hang out for leisure anymore, yesterday we had to do an assignment together. I don't want to drop him because I'm already lonely and friendless already. And I don't want to fuck around. So if I want to scratch my itch, I'm gonna have to find a new friends with benefits who will be exclusive with me (not fuck 50 other people like my former fuck buddy). What I want is a boyfriend actually, not just sex. But where I live, it's damn impossible to find a good guy that I find attractive that is single as well. Competition is just too fierce, the local girls are too eager to jump on a foreign man's dick on the first date. Local competition is even cheaper than me. And that ruins the mentality of the guys here. They're all fuckboys who don't value inner values.

[dkings]

HA! you and me are in the same boat kinda. Except, I don't have friends because I don't know anyone here. So dating is largely unproductive... I've got an itch to scratch so bad, it ain't even funny lol.

[markscott]

There's no good reason for his doing this. You set reasonable limits, and he's disrespecting you by ignoring them. If he wants to change them, he should have a discussion with you, to see if you are willing to change the rules.

[sean1234]

The question is if he's nice enough to you, then will you like him enough to give him a kiss on the cheek? Probably not, but anything can happen. At any rate if that is at all possible, tell him that. Otherwise, just tell him to stop doing it.

[Asker]

I have told him multiple times to stop touching me, which was why he had to sneak the kiss. And yesterday he also snuck a hug/cuddle/hump thing from behind. I do want to kiss him etc, but if we're not fucking, then we shouldn't kiss in public. My boundaries.

[sean1234]

Maybe not him per se, but you can't just give a guy friend a little hug? Men and women of all ages give each other hugs and kisses obviously out of love and friendship. If you are this annoyed with this man, then why hang around him at all? There are billions of other people in the world, LOL!

[Asker]

dude, there's the friendly "aw, thanks for being there, I appreciate your presence" hug, and a hug from behind followed by dry humping is not friendly at all. Big difference.

[sean1234]

followed by dry humping? DAMN! barkpost-assets.s3.amazonaws.com/.../hump.gif

Sorry just couldnt resist.

[Asker]

yeah literally like that

[souEu]

Oh, I see. He wants the benefits. Lol.

[NatashaJ]

Oh that easy because you have crusty ass lips or nasty food in your teeth. Jk jk maybe because he stills wants the booty but you not letting him have shit.

[Asker]

welll I threw myself at him yesterday cause I was horny and he refused, so... I'm off limits now

[NatashaJ]

Well or maybe he mad at you? or he has new punati

[asfend]

Depending on the guy it's a sign of affection that shows he cares about you, that isn't in any way sexual or non-platonic, but he wants to share his feelings in a way that's not taboo

[SoCk3t_PoCk3tZ]

He wants you but doesn't want to commit anything to you.
Even if it means disrespecting you. He got you in bed before so I guess he's trying his way with you again.

[SoCk3t_PoCk3tZ]

He feels he can treat you however he wants cos you gave him what he wanted anyway. You're down for friends with benefits, he's down for whenever he feels he can have you. Basically he doesn't respect your wishes cos you already gave him all he wanted, he sees you as someone he had and can have again. I guess the kiss is like a test in a way maybe and a show that he doesn't care what you say, that he has you right where he wants you.

[Prezzi3]

He wants to be friends with benefits again. Tell him, your not interested because you both already know that your not a good match.

[Asker]

actually... I wanted the benefits. He's the one saying that he needs time to reorganize his life atm

[Prezzi3]

Just ask him why he does it after you have clearly stated you wanted physical boundaries between you and him.

[Foxywizard]

I can't enter his head, but one thing is sure: don't let anyone behave on you in a way you don't tolerate. Not sure this is the case by the way: you'll see

[Bernaud]

Its one of the easiest ways of showing affection, but i guess if he really insists on it after you refused, he might want something other than "friends".

[ztrdoo7]

Dudes still into you. Trying to act cool like he is down with the situation and deep down he's probably not and got high expectations of how it's going to turn out aka back together

[rgb008]

He prob missed her mouth... bad aim and all if his eyes were closed.

[yourdarksecretx]

Maybe he loves you by his heart! He wants to be in a committed relationship

[pta59910]

Leverage. Once he has you hooked, thinking he's a nice guys... he's got you.

It's a mind game.

I know because I use to do it, in my single days

[Pecton]

I think you are being a little petty because you still want come back to you with a dating type of approach.

[ok604]

It's a nice way of saying "sorry honey, your boyfriend is way hotter"

[Dinnye001]

He wants the benefits back. Obvious.

[kiprauhl]

True that

[DivideByZero]

Amen to that.

[Asker]

actually... I wanted the benefits. He's the one saying that he needs time to reorganize his life atm

[Dinnye001]

Ah I have to explain it I see. Give me 10 minutes to get on a computer, gonna be a long one to type.

[kiprauhl]

That doesn't mean that he doesn't want it? He is just holding u warm until he found out if the other girl in his live isn't just better then u are

[saltwater84]

do you have an answer to that?

[kiprauhl]

What?

[saltwater84]

@kiprauhl talking to dinnye sorry @dinnye001

[Dinnye001]

I have, but I had to attend to an alert. I'm at work.

[Dinnye001]

So, now I have a moment to spare.

So, he may have said that he wanted distance. But the very moment you denied him something, he got hit by the fact that he lost something. Now, you see, people generally don't like that feeling. As such - he started to backpedal a wee bit.

So he does want the benefits. Otherwise, I'd say that he has other things going on in the first place.

[saltwater84]

thank you very much for us all, hope you have a good day at work !

[ZooeyWebster]

It's a sign of affection

[Cowboy6666]

He wants to enter in your pants again

[Asker]

actually... I wanted the benefits. He's the one saying that he needs time to reorganize his life atm

[Cowboy6666]

U deserve a genuine n better guy.

[liasbg]

You're both pathetic, sry to tell you that... i hope it helps somehow

[Asker]

How the fuck is that supposed to help? Your mommy didn't raise you properly I see...

[sean1234]

XD OMG

[Sha84]

simply a sign that he is excited by you

[Anonymous]

sounds like your friend is trying to get laid!

[Anonymous]

He likes her