Why am I 24 years old and still single?

I'm a guy in my early 20s and I’m coming here because I've nowhere else to go. I've seemed to 'miss' the phase in teenage development where boys learn how to attract/date girls. I now understand why I missed that phase (shyness), but that's another story and I'm a different person now. I didn’t date/kiss a girl until I was 18, and I've never been in a successful relationship. I'm now close to graduating college and it frustrates me to have not been successful in an area where all of my peers have.

For those of you who are not familiar, I will provide a little background about college campuses. Co-ed girls, especially pretty ones, are viewed as gold. They have a lot of friends, nobody is rude to them, and they have no problem finding dates. You will never find a slightly-attractive college girl alone for longer than 30 seconds. A single girl has her choice of at least five different guys she would like to go on a date with.

I work for the University at a job that requires extensive interpersonal interactions. On a daily basis I communicate with at least 50 peers on a job that has helped me acquire the social skills I did not learn during my shy years of grade school. Girls are very comfortable approaching me and talking to me, and I’ve rarely had problems communicating with them. In other words, I’m not ‘weird’ or ‘pathetic’ – I have friends, self-esteem, a reputation, and maturity.

The only place I falter is dating and attraction. I’ve never felt unconfident asking a girl on a date, and very seldom do I feel insecure after a rejection. I’ve been on countless first dates with various girls the last four years many whom I’d love to see again, and many that I wouldn’t, but never has a girl I’ve dated appeared uncomfortable during our time together. This is the reason I’ve become so frustrated and that’s why I’m here writing on this forum. I’m an epic failure when it comes to anything after the first date. Out of forty attempts (yes, I’ve counted) I haven’t landed more than one date with the same girl in over four years. It is quite common for these girls to randomly lose contact with me after these dates or make excuses as to why they can’t see me again—even the girls who seem very interested throughout the date. The number of different strategies I’ve tried are countless (I’ve found that just being myself is the most effective—I’ve gotten much nicer results from girls whom I acted natural around). The majority of these girls I’ve dated are now either in a relationship with or are ‘talking’ to other guys, most of whom have many other girls ‘chasing’ after them.

Is my luck really this bad? Have I really met forty bad girls? Also, do you think my lack of any prior relationship will ‘scare away’ a girl if things start to get a bit more serious? Will she find my lack of experience unattractive? I am getting sick of being a third wheel, and I hate being asked "why are you single?" every Christmas. Thank you for your help.
+1 y
Thank you all for the answers. It looks like I'm going to have another rough semester ahead of me, so I doubt I'll have much time to try and date girls, but I'll keep my head up. Thanks again, wish me the best!
Why am I 24 years old and still single?
6 Opinion