I hate it when thick and chubby girls try to say "I look real" to feel better about their looks?

Question

That implies that if a girl is skinny then she looks fake. Or they strongly suggest that men strictly prefer women with curves. Or they try to say that skinny girls look like they have an eating disorder to make themselves feel better about not being skinny. This really gets on my nerves. I'm not skinny, my legs are thick and I have a big butt, but up top I'm smaller like my stomach is flat and I have a tiny waist. Sorry if you've dealt with insecurity issues and struggled with not fitting the mold of what the media claims is ideal, but that's not the fault of girls who are smaller than you. The whole "Men prefer curves" thing may make you feel better, but it's not true for every man. Every man has his own personal preference. Some men don't like huge boobs. Some men don't like skinny girls. Some men don't like girls with large thighs. It's all about what the man is attracted to as an INDIVIDUAL. So please don't try and use false statements such as the ones I began this post with to validate your self esteem.

I think that beautiful women come in all shapes and sizes. I've had a lot of friends who are just bigger girls or more thick girls and the pressure when it comes to body image is heavier on them. But what they fail to realize is that a lot of skinny girls aren't all that happy about their bodies either. I'm friends with a very skinny girl and she wishes she was thicker, but she can't help it. I'm not a skinny girl and I'm not a thick girl so my perspective is very neutral.

Why is it that some of you bigger girls feel the need to try and reduce the value of skinnier girls? Can you give me your perspective? I genuinely seek to understand :)

diosadelanoche · Accepted Answer

I think part of it is that thin is the ideal, so thicker women view thin women as their oppressors. Their response is to counter-attack that ideal. Obviously the more logical response would be to promote healthy self-esteem and body acceptance, which a lot of groups/advocates are out there doing. But it's understandable that people are bitter about being devalued by society and want to attack their oppressors to make them feel the same. Kind of like how the more radical civil rights activists started insisting that white people were the devil. I like your attitude, though. Really, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. There isn't one body type that's "better" than another, because no matter what you look like, odds are that someone finds you attractive. So let's stop attacking each other and celebrate all the different kinds of beauty in the world.

Minxxe · Accepted Answer

feel better now do you? you said it best with "I think that beautiful women come in all shapes and sizes".

you just need to concentrate on what you have and making the most of that, not getting angry about things you can't control. bigger girls can lose weight and thin girls can get fat, we're not all going to fit in the same category all our lives. yes some men prefer curves but he's not going to turn you down on the basis of being thin if he likes you. you can see it as payback for modern times being so focused on size zero and idolising the twig for so long therefore reducing the value of curves, the tide is changing, it's not intended to upset people.

it's a cycle that'll keep going and going til the end of time, like penis or boob size.

saphirasilverwings · Accepted Answer

When women say that, their intent is not to criticize thinner women or make them feel bad. It's true that it might be better if they phrased it differently, perhaps saying instead that women come in all shapes and sizes, or something like that. But despite the fact that thin girls can have insecurities as well, you have to admit that they are better accepted as attractive in the Western world than heavier women. I think they have a right to try to defend themselves against media that stresses the importance of being skinny.

Galaxie500 · Accepted Answer

I agree with you.

They made it seem like skinny girls are only a product of hollywood lol, and If some normal girl is skinny she must be a stuck up bitch, who goes to the gym 3 hours a day just to get attention from the guys.

mattygfromtheMD · Accepted Answer

Big people have low self-esteem as it is, she's just doing it to justify her lifestyle and habits. It minght not be right, but let her think what she wants. I, for one, am big and don't find fat people "real".

queenofpeen · Answer

I think you already understand the reason: to feel better. But when many chubby girls say, "Real women have curves" and other BS statements like that, they don't have malicious intent behind it. At least *I* didn't when I used to say that. It was just a way of expressing anger with the media for portraying skinny as the ideal. I just didn't know any better. I had never thought about it from a skinny girl's perspective, but now that I've matured, I've come to the same conclusion you have. Individual beauty.

The crappy thing is, when girls say things like, "I'm a REAL girl," they're taking a step backward from what the message SHOULD be: self-love. All of this "I'm better than you" stuff has got to stop. Bringing down skinny girls is not the answer, it just gives MORE people low self-esteem.

Rant over, haha.

peace-love-couture · Answer

Honestly, girls annoy the sh*t outta me.

Why do we(society) have to go to great strives to make all you stupid bitches feel good?

I'm a girl, but I can't stand girls, whether skinny, curvy or fat.

Society worships skinny, so no one is devaluing anything.

xzinax2 · Answer

they do it to make themselves feel better.f*** them,there's nothing wrong with being skinny,or chubby,and I don't think the media should try to make any group feel better about themselves either,every time they try to make fat girls feel better,they insult the skinny ones,and vice versa. people should just try to be healthy.

Pancakes · Answer

I just think it's hilarious when women and men say that being curvier is better to counteract the skinnier the better "ideal". If anything it's more difficult to be curvy than skinny, if you want to be thin then you can lose weight but to be curvy when you're not you would have to change your bone structure...

Anonymous · Answer

i don't give a f*** what fat girls think about themselves, just like I don't give a f*** what skinny girls think about themselves either.

Anonymous · Answer

Skinny women are worthless don't even bother talking to them...

Shaun · Answer

It's not good enough that you're skinny? Piss off.

I hate it when thick and chubby girls try to say "I look real" to feel better about their looks?

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