Are men really visual creatures?

Question

Since a few days i have getting signs from nearly everywhere that men are visual creatures and if you don't provide them somethinh to look /stare at they will lose interest in you? Is it really true. Like you guys really care about how my thighs and waist look? Can't i find love if my body isn't perfect?

iluvtoknow · Accepted Answer

I've read some of the comments you left on the other opinions, and you seem like a really nice person. Please don't let all the comments in agreement with your premise get you down. Sometimes it's really hard to understand how the opposite gender thinks, especially when you want something (like love or affection) from them and don't know where to start. But questions like these are ultimately generalizations, and while some people may find some truth in them, there will always be plenty of people for whom it's not the case. There is just as much diversity among men as there is among women, of course. The results you see only really show that there is a trend that people on GaG are largely 'visual creatures' in the way you described it.

By and large, that need not be the case. Stephen Chbosky wrote in "The Perks of Being a Wallflower" that "we accept the love we think we deserve," and I think that that holds true. If you want a guy who's not going to be obsessed about looks over one's personality, you just have to make sure you don't settle for any less. People like that are out there, although perhaps they may not be in the places you're used to looking.

As for the constant mantra that "men are visual creatures," we live in a sexualized society. The internet has made pornography ubiquitous. Feminism has promoted promiscuity among women, and approached equality among the sexes largely from bringing everyone into a more sexed-up ideal. Hook-up culture's everywhere in colleges, sex sells in marketing, etc. etc. It's everywhere. And since it's human nature to fit into your societal norm, more and more people buy into it every year as well.

But it's just as much a human ideal to want to find people who complement who they are—to seek companionship, love, and affection. Frankly, I think that's a dream for a lot of people (at least among educated people), even if they give up on it or don't think they have the ability to attain it. It's certainly my dream, and I don't want to see my girlfriend scantily-clad or have sex with her until I'm married for those reasons—I'd much rather spend my time developing a deeper bond with her.

People's priorities just differ. It is true that I think men get more of a sexual kick out of women's bodies than vice versa, and for men who prioritize sex (or aren't looking for long-term things for whatever reason) that's certainly something important to look into. Some people do it because they're accustomed to thinking that's what they do. And some people do it because they have no self-control, even when that self-control could do them favors in their relationships and in life. People are different.

I suppose what I'm trying to say is that you can't find a simple generalization to lump up men. You just have to figure out what you want and look for it. We're young; we have time to improve ourselves right now, so there's no need to settle for something less than what we deserve (unless you're being hypocritical in your desires.) So don't.
Men aren't all superficial. I wouldn't even say most are. But certainly the loudest are. And it's probably the same with women.

I also think there's a tendency among women to gravitate towards a certain type of smooth, alpha (for lack of a better word) men, who might be predisposed to certain sexual attraction-first ideas of 'love,' that pervert those women's opinions of men as a whole.

Please feel free to comment if anything unclear or you want to talk further; I always love getting responses!

Oh, and if all of this is rooted in a man just asking for pictures of you (and I assume innocent-ones, not sexy ones), I don't think that really has any bearing on this—people like to know who they're dating. I can't imagine not seeing the person I'm falling for. But if you're talking about someone you already know asking for sexy pictures when you're away, that's a different story, and see the above.

FunkyMonkee · Accepted Answer

If a stick with tits walked into a room, we'd all look!!
I can't speak for most guys but, you don't HAVE to provide us with ANYTHING!! Just be YOU! If that's not good enough for him, B'byyyye!! Look all you want but keep right on walkin'!!!
And, if all they're interested in is eye candy, chances are, they aren't gonna be worth it OR loyal to you!! Like I said, I can't speak for all guys because I'm a different case. when I got into my first LTR, I told her flat out, "I'm GONNA look at other girls but, that DOESN'T mean I'm shopping around!! To me, they're just like beautiful works of art and I'm just admiring them for that! YOU'RE the one I'm madly, passionately in love with!! YOU'RE the one I want spend the rest of my life with!! NO ONE is gonna take me away from you!!"
Even though I actually had other offers while I was with her for those 10 years, I turned them ALL down!!! I had what I wanted and that was all there was to it!!
As for your body not being perfect, in the first place, who wants that? A world full of Barbie Dolls would be pretty boring!! Would you like a world full of Kens? Secondly, you don't HAVE to be perfect to find a guy!! Mu uncle was married to a super model type and had 7 kids with her. They got divorced about 25 years later and he met another woman who was very short, chubby, bossy, had a mouth on her like a truck driver, she was loud and rude and didn't care who liked it, she drank like a fish, smoked like a chimney and had a voice that could peel paint!! He married her and had two more kids!! NOBODY liked her except him!! So, you DON'T HAVE to be perfect to get a guy!! You're personality SHOULD be the main attraction!! Your looks and body SHOULD only be the extra feature. As far as I'm concerned, any guy that doesn't think so probably isn't worth your time or effort!!

TurboKid · Answer

I'm very visual but not very shallow or superficial. The difference is that I put more stock into things like body language, style, mannerisms, tone of voice, than what someone says as a way to sort of determine who they are. So in a sense, I'm evaluating personality visually more than verbally.

I think I'm extreme even by men's standards but it even changes the way I experience things like music. I think most people like music in its own right. For me, the music conjures up visual images in my head. I like a song if I like the images.

Still, I think lots of women are at least somewhat visual too. After all, when a woman says she wants a confident man, how can you tell he's confident just based on what he writes? Isn't a big part of telling how confident he is using your eyes and looking at his body language and how he responds to social situations? How can you tell how confident he is just based on what he says? Do you just trust a guy who texts, "I'm very confident," to actually be so?

ohshee · Answer

I think most guys are visual but they also can feel you most guys don't understand what's going on. I could be walking through a mall and I will feel this energy and my eyes will go right to it and whoever I feel the energy from I will look put that feeling and the visual together I can feel the the person I'm looking at to me that's more important then the visual. I look at girls different than guys do. Most guys look at a girl and they believe the person they see is truly who they are it's not. It's the person who you cannot see. I'm interested in true beauty of a person is on the inside the real person of that body isn't on the inside heart the confidence everything about her she's on the inside show me the outside of a girl is just a bonus. The real beauty is on the inside and I can tell you right now you're very beautiful person and I don't even have to see you I can just tell by your words and the way you see and feel things

scholastic_vibez · Answer

Most men are visual creatures when it comes to the opposite sex in the initial first stages, then emotional, and/or intellectual attachment last.

For myself? I’m wired differently. I feel very asexual most of them time. I have to have an intellectual/emotional connection. The physical attraction usually comes last for me. I don’t think I could have a one night stand based purely on lust only with anyone unless I had the later attachment criterion I mentioned.

oldasIfeel22 · Answer

Yes but we are also thoughtful creatures as well (mature men).

I’m almost 40 and I still feel strong impulses when I see an attractive woman walk by. But I sure as hell don’t act the same way about it as I did at 16. I do care about all sorts of attributes besides her looks. I also know that depending on the circumstance most women don’t like getting hit on out of nowhere (unless she thinks I’m really cute too but even then it’s a toss up).

I know my brain (and my D) well enough nowadays not to make stupid/rash decisions. But the answer is yes. Our brains are wired to be visual but we can also have self control.

kkirk4442 · Answer

Guys are definitely visual creatures, and they notice how a woman looks, what she is shaped like, etc. That does not mean that you have to provide something for them to stare at to keep their interest. Decent guys are capable of having a loving relationship with a girl, without constant visual stimulation. If the guys needs a lot of visual stimulation to stay in the relationship, then you have a jerk, and dump him.

TheorionMage · Answer

The ancient Greek Philosophers espouse there ARE SIX TYPES of "Love".

Of COURSE, you CAN 'find' Love,
... whether its the TYPE of 'Love' you're seeking
depends upon HOW 'discerning' YOU choose to BE.
Males foremost are visually infatuated by female appearance indicative of
BOTH high female peer prestige and fecund vitality. 'Style' & 'fitness'.

The late wise-cracking 1940's comedian Groucho Marx,
one of the famous Marx brothers, quipped:
"I REFUSE to associate with ANY club that would accept ME... for one of IT'S members"

loveslongnails · Answer

You're 21, so imagine you're dealing with a boy in your age range? Yes, men are extremely visual creatures, especially under the age 25, but we always will be at any age. However, that doesn't mean we all need a "perfect looking mate" to stare at all the time. Sounds like you're dealing with a child, so you need to be an adult and tell the child to grow up because you don't date children.

padreflint · Answer

Yes men are very much visual creatures. As far as women are concerned, we will quickly process that a woman is attractive. Meaning subconsciously she is probably healthy, able to bear offspring, and provide for offspring.

We will also quickly process that a car is nice looking. Meaning it's probably well maintained and possibly a good purchase.

We will also take visual queues of a situation and quickly process that it is possibly safe or unsafe.

So yes men are very much visual creatures. That's why, statistically more men watch porn and more women read erotic stories.

The_Maphio · Answer

We are visual since we are the ones starting the conversation when it's a matter of trying and match up with the other gender. Or at least, we used to do that almost exclusively since not much earlier on.
As thus, we had to feel attraction for the woman we were to approach, and since you can't understand if you're dealing with a smart woman or a chicken head by the looks, visuals is all that remains.
Sexually speaking, all of us have personal favourite parts of a woman's body taht we check out before making the decision.
Sexually wise, having sex with a woman with the lights turned off is not rare, so once the "prey" is in the net, visuals are not all that necessary anymore.

TheBigGuy9 · Answer

Many people want makes them happy NOW. The internet, social media. Everything has gotten too easy in life. And this is especially tough on guys your age, they have zero discipline. All they want to see is tits and ass even when they aren’t horny

As far as men being visual creatures. Yes, we all are, but imagination/discipline are better. You don’t have to show me ever curve on your ass, or have half your tits hanging out. I much prefer conservative dressed in public. If we’re dating, then yes. At like a home date for me and me only, dress like a skank.
The one place that doesn’t apply is at the beach. I’m all for a thong bikini. That’s the time to show it if you got it

notbot · Answer

Yes, we men are visual creatures.

No, we don't mind if you don't have a perfect body. Neither do we have a perfect body. We will be happy with the girl we will have. But because we are visual creatures, we love to see it all. And we even appriciate and praise it, in a geniune manner.

CentralPerk77 · Answer

Yes they are. I believe the term is auto-erotic. This said it’s a primary form of stimulation in how males of our species identify mates. It’s not the only one as any blind man can tell you, however to those of us who are not blind it’s pretty important. This said, yea it’s pretty well documented.

TallAnon · Answer

We are very visual, yes.
Not even just for sexual attractiveness, there's a lot you can learn about someone from the way they treat their own bodies.
In general, remember that the average dude would fuck a 6, everything above that is a bonus. Do you have all your limbs, are you the age you said, are you not a whale, cool, that's a 5 already.

Searlas · Answer

Yes, beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, each and every woman is beautiful in her own way. A woman has to be physical appealing, any man who goes for a woman he doesn’t consider beautiful physically is insecure, traditionally men would marry a less beautiful women for it was believed they had less suitors or can be a faithful house wives. To me, a woman body has to be appealing sexually, also flexible to sustain a mans sexual interest.

Anonymous · Answer

As much as women aren't visual?
Yes I have to at least be a little attracted to a woman or there is no hope for a future between us. I'd think that'd be true of women as well though. But I'm told women are mostly drawn to a guys "personality". But the reality is out of every woman I've met online has not even read my dating profile. The last woman I met was a vegan, buddies, sustainable-living-off-the- grid enthussiast. We had NOTHING in common. I'd be the absolute opposite of that. And when I asked her she could not say one thing my dating bio said. So what drew her to me if it wasn't my pics?

rievious · Answer

Not exactly. I've fallen for women before seeing them. Men are capable for falling for personalities. Sadly, for me if I receive 1 picture then I'll want another. Just like the "If you give a mouse a cookie" child book.

Now if you meant during sex then yes, at least I'm a very visual creature when it comes to sex.

SupremeWarlord · Answer

Yes, so are women, it's part of human nature, to be closer to what we find aesthetically pleasing. You do not have to have the perfect body, just to take care of yourself, or at least be comfortable in your body, you will attract your type of guys this way.

elvitto · Answer

We have a spiritual side too. We have feelings too. Dont confuse it.
But yess there is no way in the world for me to see an attractive female and go crazy just by looking at her.

I dont need any interaction at all to decide wether i want to f*ck her or not. Just by seing.

rjroy3 · Answer

As someone who has done long distance.

If you want a happy man, then sending pictures is a part of that. Attraction, sex, that shit matters. Personally, I'd say if you're uncomfortable sending photos at this time then download the app Marco Polo and send short videos to eachother through that.

Just have conversation and be generally flirty. Maybe send sexy shit once in awhile

Miristheiss · Answer

Yes.
All it takes is the sight of a woman that attracts us to set everything in motion and cause a man to want a woman, to want to meet her to get those butterflies.
Men get intense pleasure out of seeing a woman with his eyes.

That is why it is called eye candy.

Men are visual.

Stoner710 · Answer

Very much so, this is why it’s important to lock use down before sleeping with us. Even the shoulder exposed is enough to turn it on we loves women’s soft glowing skin. This is why every woman needs to understand that you guys are going to stare doesn’t mean we’re cheating on you

ThisAndThat · Answer

Yes I am visual very much so. That is and how it's always to get my initial attraction in the first place. If not for that distinction there would be nothing to attract me by and therefor nothing further to be expected. In other words I see her chemistry in her beauty and it goes from there. But beauty doesn't mean everything either. There has to be that something special about her behind her beauty too.

Shaggy_KW · Answer

Eh, my main thing is if I'm gonna spend my life with you, I want to be attracted to you visually and personally. Like I love you for you but I also want you to look attractive to me personally. However, there are some guys that will want you only for your body and some that may love you for your personality. I ride that line in between where I like both.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

Humans in general are visual creatures, it's why we have color vision and market toys and food in colorful packaging, and have art and movies and video games, and comic books and cosplaying, and larping and fancy cars, and collectables that exist to just sit a shelf and be admired.

its why porn exists, why commercials for restaurants exist. its actually really rare when someone isn't visually stimulated, male or female. Why does this bother you?

invalid1 · Answer

Remain like this. Be difficult.
Real men will try harder for you.

Because when we're visual it means we are 100% sexual to this or that girl. With visuals you can seduce armies of men, who don't even know who you are lol.

CallmeTheKnight · Answer

People are visual in general not just men. A lot of people like to put a face to a name and personality. We men are not creatures, We are Men. Not every man you come across has been that way to you to you. It only seems that way because they stand out more because of the repetition.

Lynx122 · Answer

Yes we are but it doesn't mean your body has to be perfect. If you look at a flower it's beautiful even if it's not perfect right?

jason0559 · Answer

Too some extent it's true men's are visual creatures but all depends on a person to person or mentality or I can say upbringing also matters
But in ur case the guy is obsessed with u it look like if u don't want too shear ur photos it's truly ur choice. He has to understand what u want and u have to shear that u don't like this if he truly loves u he will understand other wisse break up is also a good options

NathanDavis · Answer

Yes, and if someone around me moves too quick and sudden, I notice it instantly, then I have to stop myself from chasing right after them.

AmeerX · Answer

False. I like someone who is absolutely different. And not beautiful by normal standards

Are men really visual creatures?

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