Would you tell your ex, if you were pregnant with his child?

[Anonymous]

If they aren't married, the mother of the child isn't legally obligated to tell him, right?

[MTC29]

Legally, you have obligation to name the father, however, not telling him is cruel. If your plan is to remove the guy completely from your life, he still has paternal rights and if he suspects he's the father he can order a DNA test. A father's rights with a child born out of wedlock is therefore the same as a father's rights with a child born within a marriage,
so if the test proves paternity (those tests are accurate beyond measure) he now has full rights to visit his child- and an obligation to support it.

[Asker]

But can anyone just order a paternity test? Isn't this a costly and time-consuming procedure?

[MTC29]

Not just anyone, SOMEONE who suspects that he is the father of the unborn child. The test is not time consuming at all, nor is it expensive. DNA test kits can be purchased online for under $50- people use them for heritage or ancestry research, but proof of paternity require the test be performed by a lab. That will probably cost around $200, but the guy will be paying. The woman can refuse, but the guy can get a court order and the court will MAKE the woman do it. Would there be any reason for this guy to suspect that he was the father of this hypothetical child?

[Asker]

Probably not.
I mean how on earth would he find out?

[MTC29]

I don't know, if they work in the same office, slept together several times, each time having unprotected sex, and one morning she walks in, obviously pregnant... he may be suspicious. On the other hand, if they hooked up one night in a hostel in Athens, Greece, then he went back to London and she came home to Los Angeles, the chances are nil.

[Asker]

Yes you're right.. Or if they have common friends on social media

[Pterodon]

Yes she is and she’s a fucking idiot for not getting court ordered child support

[Anonymous]

It would be very cruel not to tell him.