How should I feel about him and should I delete his number (I think I hate him)?

[Anonymous]

I'll try and make this short.. I've kind of liked a childhood friend for awhile and we are sort of like family but not really. When we were younger we played together etc but during our teenage years we didn't talk and he became popular etc. I wasn't his type of girl.

2016.. early 20's.. He started to pay me a little attention. (I think bc I wasn't really paying him attention) He started to notice me and show little bits of non sexual affection. He followed me on instagram and liked my pics, watched my stories etc.. I kind of got uncomfortable and unfollowed him bc other girls who liked him started to notice and they could be catty over him. I had a "friend" who used me to get to him. She actually hated me. He unfollowed me back.

2019.. I messaged him on fb to tell him congrats on going to graduate school overseas. He reached out excited and said thanks.

2020.. It was a hard year for me and things were happening in my life. I had gotten intoxicated and sent him a message that said "fuck you" something like that. Then I blocked him from responding. I was highly embarrassed and I sent a apology to him with no response.

2021- I had actually prayed that he would reach out to me. I was worried that he was still upset. He reached out to me on Thanksgiving. he said "hey ___! It's _____. Just wanted to say happy Thanksgiving. Love you!

I was happy but also upset. 1. because he never reached out to see if I was ok after having
erratic behavior. 2. I think he was trying to play with my emotions. 3. I think he likes the girl who was trying to use me and I feel jealous

should I confront him and have hime delete my number

Updates

+1 y

I just feel like maybe he never cared and he only reached out bc he's lonely

[Iron_Man]

I’m so sorry to hear that I’m glad that you’re a Christian girl. Take the pressure off of your shoulders and move on in your life if something happens he will be reaching out to you you cannot worry about this guy any longer

[Asker]

I keep getting mixed feelings in the comments. People say it's my fault, some say he's trying to keep in contact and others say forget him..

[Iron_Man]

Keep all the information you can but put it away in a drawer find yourself a boyfriend if he ever comes around keep yourself available if you don’t have a boyfriend that is

[Asker]

okay, thank you. I deserve a better friend

[Iron_Man]

Yes you do And you are welcome

[Iron_Man]

Thanks for most helpful Award

[Asker]

Please don't judge me. I did something terrible a couple years ago.

I went on a fake page and under the "fake friends" picture a horrible comment. I didn't know that I was trying to follow him too on the fake page. Anyway, him and the "fake friend" don't follow each other on social media, but I think he saw the comment that I wrote on her page because he blocked me.

I feel horrible to this day and that's the real reason why I don't want to invite hime back. I was so low at that time and really jealous of her AND mad that she discarded me and used me. I would feel uncomfortable and kind of crazy. Its f'd up what I did and he has no idea.

[Iron_Man]

It’s ok Of course I don’t hate you

[Asker]

what about the guy

[Iron_Man]

Apologized and take him out to dinner your treat

[horatiohornblower]

It seems to me that you keep pushing him away. Whenever he tried to rekindle your friendship and have you play some part in his life. I'd say stop doing that and embrace him back into your life. Since he seems to miss you.

[Asker]

I push him away bc i feel he may be a player.

[Asker]

why didn't he say anything or reach out to me when I was actually suffering? He doesn't really want me in his life or he only wants me when it's convenient for him. he's just lonely ig

[horatiohornblower]

It's not as though he really knew you anymore. He was probably confused and just decided not to contact you. After a random angry text. Probably not understanding what's going on in your head.

If he was a childhood friend. Even if he is a player now. I can't imagine him treating you horribly. Just talk with him and don't wig out and suddenly block him again. For no good reason.

If you don't want to be friends. That's fine. So, far it just doesn't seem like he's done anything mean. Just reaches out to an old friend then gets rebuffed.

[Asker]

it wasn't only the message it was my whole change in behavior on social media, but you're right. Im probably jealous that he may like my fake "friend".. its not my buisness and im going to move on.

[Asker]

I did and said some awful things during that time. You're right.. he basically has no idea. I feel weird accepting him into my life bc I was a bad person. I was a bad person towards him (out of fear) and towards other people bc I was hurting. Thats no excuse to hurt people but I just lost myself.

If he found out. I know he would hate me or never talk to me again

[horatiohornblower]

People are forgiving. If you give them a chance to forgive you.

[Asker]

Maybe, Im just afraid that he will hate me.

[Asker]

another thing, he's also seen me post half naked pics online.

I totally cleaned up my act and post more positive things.

[Asker]

and when he text me happy Thanksgiving.. I replied but he only hearted the message. I feel like he text in ways that don't keep the convo going. Also saying love you... thats platonic?

[horatiohornblower]

Yea, that’s probably platonic. He may also not be much of a texter.

[Asker]

well if it's platonic i dont want it. ill ignore him

[Asker]

i thought he was interested in the beginning. screw him and my fake friend

[Asker]

This is the last time I'm going to reply. The real reason I push him away is bc has a lot of competitive females. The fake friend for example... like I want nothing to do with him. the girl and I almost fought

[horatiohornblower]

You can keep up with it. But he might just miss his friend. Especially if he's just been having empty relationships with women.

[horatiohornblower]

Even though I haven't seen my childhood friends in a long time. They'll always hold a special place to me.

[Asker]

nothing romantic? he isn't interested in me like that?

And what about my fake friend who used me to get to him? I feel like he prob would want to know her more than me bc she's more attractive. Im still hurt that he didn't reach out but he was eyeing her

[horatiohornblower]

Nothing you posted makes me think he thinks of you as a friend. I had some close female friends in childhood. Really they were the only kids in the neighborhood my age. They got pretty but I couldn’t think of them that way. I’d be too weird.

[Asker]

I didn't understand your first sentence. Did you mean nothing I posted makes you think he likes me as more than a friend?

and what about the friend?

[horatiohornblower]

No, nothing posted makes me think he has sexual interest. Just wanting to reach out to an old friend.

[Asker]

oh okay, well if he's not interested. I don't want to be his friend

[Asker]

but you're right. He asked my dad when I was going to be in town. He wanted to hang out with me and my step sister (he's also known her since she was young)

I don't talk to my step sister anymore, so she might say bad things about me to him.

[Asker]

Please don't judge me. I did something terrible a couple years ago.

I went on a fake page and under the "fake friends" picture a horrible comment. I didn't know that I was trying to follow him too on the fake page. Anyway, him and the "fake friend" don't follow each other on social media, but I think he saw the comment that I wrote on her page because he blocked me.

I feel horrible to this day and that's the real reason why I don't want to invite hime back. I was so low at that time and really jealous of her AND mad that she discarded me and used me. I would feel uncomfortable and kind of crazy. Its f'd up what I did and he has no idea.

[horatiohornblower]

It just seems you have all these issues going on with your head about him. Flip flopping on liking, not liking or rejecting him. But he has no idea that any of this is even going on. He's probably more bewildered than anything. All that's keeping him out of your life. Is you not letting him in.

[Asker]

you're making this sound easy as pie... do you not think he will hate me or deem me as crazy? What about the friend? he will find out

[horatiohornblower]

Advice is the easy part. All I can do is point in a direction and say to go there.

He's still tried to reach you. So, I don't think he'll hate you. I didn't read anything of that you said. Which would make me hate you. It's not like you killed his dog and left it hanging in his yard. You've just been a bit erratic and said some random mean things. I wouldn't have any friends if that's all it took to end them.

I know girls can hold grudges over random snide things said. Like no other. But guys don't usually roll that way. Most of that crap rolls off our backs by the end of the day.

[Asker]

do you think he likes the other girl?

[horatiohornblower]

The friend seemed like a long time ago. Unless they're dating or something like that. They probably just drifted apart.

[Asker]

no they never dated.. i dont understand your statement

[Asker]

esp. since he blocked me for the comment and they were not following eachother. It was awhile ago but Im just curious

[horatiohornblower]

If they aren’t dating and never dated. But also not following her. I expect he’s not particularly fond of her. Probably just neutral.

[Asker]

then why did he block the fake page.. he must of cared somewhat

[Bubbles9997]

If he found out there is no way he would forgive her. He may think she's crazy..

[Bubbles9997]

@horatiohornblower its still bothering me that he never reached out when I was at my lowest. Its like he saw a tragedy and dipped... friends dont do that.. not real friends.. its not jist the angry text.. it was my whole behavior on facebook..

[Avicenna]

No, message him back and try to start a convo to see how he's doing

[Asker]

ehhh I don't know, I dont think he wants to talk

[Avicenna]

You have nothing to lose

[Asker]

I did and said some awful things during that time. You're right.. he basically has no idea. I feel weird accepting him into my life bc I was a bad person. I was a bad person towards him (out of fear) and towards other people bc I was hurting. Thats no excuse to hurt people but I just lost myself.

If he found out. I know he would hate me or never talk to me again

[bean2k21]

why waste your time even thinking about it... block

[Asker]

because I really liked him and I feel hurt

[lottiebannotie]

He should delete you

[Asker]

what I do?

[Asker]

can you further explain