Have you ever been spanked by your boyfriend/husband without your consent?

[Anonymous]

During past week I had many arguments with my boyfriend. Most of them were about me not eating anything and exercising a lot. Also I was keep taking painkillers.. on empty stomach. I felt really sick once and my energy was low so I called him to pick me up from the gym. Of course that's when our arguments started. The next day he was kinda worried about me so he just joined me on my gym session. After workout, I literally fainted in his arms. When I felt better he drove us home. The entire time he wouldn't stop talking about me acting like an irresponsible child. I got mad and yelled at him. We got home and I slammed the door in his face and that's when I could understand he was mad as hell. He just grabbed me and put me over his knee. At first , I didn't figure out what was happening but that changed really quick when he actually started spanking me. I struggled to get up and failed. Instantly crying because I felt ashamed and also it hurt. The spanks were not so hard or violent but because he was keep on repeating em, the pain build up. Eventually he stopped and I didn't get up. I was laying there over his lap crying my soul out while he was kissing my head and whispering to me that he's sorry for seeing me crying, but not sorry for doing the right thing. I liked the fact that he took charge when I challenged him. Now I feel more in love with him than ever. Am I crazy? Also been on my best behaviour since. I actually let him cook meals for me.

[SladeTannon]

You're not crazy, but that's definitely something he shouldn't have done without discussing that part of your relationship beforehand.

[slatyb]

You aren't crazy. It sounds like you both enjoyed it. I think you need to have a discussion with him about how you will proceed.

[Anonymous]

You asked “Am I crazy [for feeling] “more in love with [my guy] than ever” [after he] “put me over his knee [and] actually started spanking me?”

No, you’re definitely not…

There actually seems to be very good reasons why you feel this way—it sounds like a couple things are going on…

You may have never (or not often) experienced structure/boundaries & discipline from your parents while growing up, which — although kids usually rebel against it — most kids eventually realize that “strict guidance & discipline” is given out of love & caring for the child’s well-being…

So, maybe your guy angrily reacting to you about you not eating anything, exercising a lot, and taking painkillers on an empty stomach; and you “slamm[ing] the door in his face”; and him expressly “talking about [you] acting like an irresponsible child”; and then him “disciplining” you for all of it (by spanking you over his knee) is something you’ve subconsciously been craving in your life (?).

It seems to me you’ve really wanted someone in your life who will finally care (or care more) about what you do, and not let you “do whatever the hell you want to do” with yourself if it’s actually hurtful to you.

Also, I think BDSM is very appealing to you — because of your “no or little-discipline upbringing.” (Who knows…maybe you were a “hellion” growing up and always rebelling, and always getting disciplined; and you now want the harsh discipline that you used to receive when you were young to be duplicated in your life nowadays.)

Concerning BDSM - this is:
Part 1. Bondage & Discipline
Part 2. Domination & Submission
Part 3. Sadism & Masochism

Because of what you expressed in your question writeup, I think you definitely like being disciplined & dominated (BDSM Parts 1 & 2).

But I think you also expressed how you like BDSM Part 3 - Sadism & Masochism…

After he spanked you over his knee you said: “Instantly [I was] crying because I felt ashamed and also it hurt…. the pain build up…I was laying there over his lap crying my soul out while he was kissing my head and whispering to me that he's sorry for seeing me crying, but not sorry for doing the right thing.”

BDSM Part 3: Sadism & Masochism is about inflicting & receiving pain and/or humiliation…which you expressed happened to you, and you seem to like.

So:
It appears that because of this “spanking experience” you may have discovered the guy you’re currently with is THE RIGHT GUY FOR YOU and/or realized that you’re very much “into” BDSM…have fun exploring this with your guy.

[jennyjenjen98]

I think you need to talk to your boyfriend and let him know how you felt about being spanked. Maybe it's something you want to continue going forward, or maybe not. I've been spanked by a boyfriend before but it was something that I agreed to. If it was something that just happened out of the blue it might have been a problem.