What does it mean when the person I dated said I trip him off sometimes because I treat him better than anyone he’s been with and he isn’t used to it?

[bsdfn11]

The guy that I dated said he got cheated and hurt by a lot of people in his past and he doesn’t think he’s ready but he wants to get to know me and go out with me. I was a nerd in high school and well he did drugs, was a drug dealer, got into lots of fights etc but He’s in the millitary now tho and said that he doesn’t want to come back and then see me with another guy bc sometimes he thinks I would cheat on him. What confused me is that it seemed he lead me on bc before he was like “Yiure mine” and he even asked me to be his girlfriend which I said no because he makes me feel lonely and neglected …but at some point he ended up saying that sometimes it feels like he would never be good enough for me etc. He said he wants us to be just friends and not friends with benefits because he isn’t interested in that and doesn’t think it’s right for him to treat me like that. I’m sad and hurt because I feel like he lead me on at some point and just wished he was honest also, I don’t understand why he said I’m too nice and caring and he isn’t used to that like I can’t change myself to be something I’m not. I don't know what to do or how to feel hinestky. He was my first and the first guy I really liked. We’re both 20 by the way.

[dustybiker]

That’s a pretty big compliment in his case.

Can I suggest something? If you are/or get together with him.. He’s been hurt. Make efforts to go out of your way being transparent with him. It will help him heal and trust you. He’ll be more likely to do the same in return too.

[bsdfn11]

I don’t think we’d get back together cuz I don’t feel about him the way I did and I feel like he lead me on just because he didn’t know what he wanted… he was the first guy I was with so I felt like I just wasted my time with him and I just don’t know how to feel about this sudden change hinestky like he went from “be my girlfriend” “I will come back for u” to “You’re too good for me and you treat me better but I don’t think I’m ready and I feel like I won’t be going enough for you but I still want to be with u but let’s be friends now so we can last” it’s so confusing and I’m hurt and angry.

[dustybiker]

Probably for the best.

[Sonoreti]

In my honest opinion, the guy needs to go get himself sorted out first. He clearly isn‘t sure about his feelings for you but still like you enough to want you to be there in his life.


My advice for you is to not let yourself expect too much from him. You shouldn‘t have to wait for someone who is obviously still rather emotionally immature. Stay friends with him if you want but remember to put yourself first and give yourself a chance to meet someone different.


This might sound cheesy but i truly believe if two people are meant to be together, they will come together in the end. Not because of some mysterious force from above that makes it happen, no 😂, but because if he truly cares for you in the end, he will conciously make decisions that will bring you two together.


So stay strong girl 💪🏻and be kind with yourself 🙂

[Guy13]

Trip him OUT… startle him…stunned by you. You treat him better than deserved or better than anyone ever has.

[bsdfn11]

So what should I do now? We have 13 hour time difference ever since he got back in the army and he extended his service so I don’t think anything would occur between us anymore and I don't know how to feel about what he’s saying now? It’s like he suddenly switched up and changed and that confused me a lot… literally, months ago he was just being perfect in everything except his communication… and he always made me wait but now, all of a sudden.. I’m too good and nice and he isn’t used to it but he still had feelings for me and wants to be with me but he doesn’t think he’s ready? I’m just crying right now because I don’t know how to feel about this

[Guy13]

Where does he serve? You’re too good and he’s backed off totally now or he appreciates you more ⁉️
There’s nothing you can do especially if he is from a NC base, Norfolk, or California Navy. He extended Time ⁉️

[bsdfn11]

They transferred him to okinawa Japan and he was supposed to get off next year but he said he added two more years

[Guy13]

What are you guys…white black or what?

[bsdfn11]

What do you mean by that? What does race have to do with this? We’re both American tho

[Guy13]

In Japan…answer my question please. It matters

[Avicenna]

Sounds like he wasn’t compatible with you

[bsdfn11]

We do have our differences and he barely met my standards… I just liked him that’s why I adjusted my standards for him and I don’t go for guys like him either so yeah, we probably aren’t compatible for each other I guess

[Iron_Man]

He likes you