The guy that I dated said he got cheated and hurt by a lot of people in his past and he doesn’t think he’s ready but he wants to get to know me and go out with me. I was a nerd in high school and well he did drugs, was a drug dealer, got into lots of fights etc but He’s in the millitary now tho and said that he doesn’t want to come back and then see me with another guy bc sometimes he thinks I would cheat on him. What confused me is that it seemed he lead me on bc before he was like “Yiure mine” and he even asked me to be his girlfriend which I said no because he makes me feel lonely and neglected …but at some point he ended up saying that sometimes it feels like he would never be good enough for me etc. He said he wants us to be just friends and not friends with benefits because he isn’t interested in that and doesn’t think it’s right for him to treat me like that. I’m sad and hurt because I feel like he lead me on at some point and just wished he was honest also, I don’t understand why he said I’m too nice and caring and he isn’t used to that like I can’t change myself to be something I’m not. I don't know what to do or how to feel hinestky. He was my first and the first guy I really liked. We’re both 20 by the way.
That’s a pretty big compliment in his case.
Can I suggest something? If you are/or get together with him.. He’s been hurt. Make efforts to go out of your way being transparent with him. It will help him heal and trust you. He’ll be more likely to do the same in return too.
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In my honest opinion, the guy needs to go get himself sorted out first. He clearly isn‘t sure about his feelings for you but still like you enough to want you to be there in his life.
My advice for you is to not let yourself expect too much from him. You shouldn‘t have to wait for someone who is obviously still rather emotionally immature. Stay friends with him if you want but remember to put yourself first and give yourself a chance to meet someone different.
This might sound cheesy but i truly believe if two people are meant to be together, they will come together in the end. Not because of some mysterious force from above that makes it happen, no 😂, but because if he truly cares for you in the end, he will conciously make decisions that will bring you two together.
So stay strong girl 💪🏻and be kind with yourself 🙂
Trip him OUT… startle him…stunned by you. You treat him better than deserved or better than anyone ever has.
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Sounds like he wasn’t compatible with you
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