Do some men self sabotage when they think the girl they are seeing is too good for them?

Question

Datboi65 · Accepted Answer

No. We don't overthink as much. Why? Because we don't ask our friends as much.

Women need approval of their friends for their dating choices, and they can overthink the situation sometimes if the guy is too good to be true. My theory is because women's standards are far too high, that when they meet a guy who meets ALL of them they assume that there MUST be something wrong with him, causing them to push him away. Men are more simple and think less about such a possibility, so if we meet a woman that fulfills our criteria, we are more likely to commit.

Lionman95 · Accepted Answer

Yes maybe but one of the reasons is that many guys have actually no clue what their possible girl is interested in or is looking for when it comes to a relationship. Because I´m of those guys who has sometimes a good relationship to girls but I rarely ask them out because I didn´t want to risk a friendship if she rejected me. Because I know I can´t be friends with a woman that´s rejected me.

Adaeva · Accepted Answer

That is not the way it works. At ages 12 and 13, most boys ask the prettiest girls and get rejected every time they ask. Therefore, by their mid teens, guys learn they have no chance of dating the prettiest girls and start settling for girls they can date.

By their late teens, almost all men know better than to approach pretty girls out of their league. They never try because they know they will be rejected.

jennifer_bloom · Accepted Answer

I might sabotage if I think a guy is too good for me. Such as not risking it cause I do not know if I can replace him in the event we break up. Or not trying hard to enough to make it work cause I view the chances of failure as higher than the chances of wasted time and effort.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

No, but we will self sabotage if we have self confidence issues. It has nothing to do with the caliber of woman though

tfan1 · Answer

Yes, I almost chickened out when I approached my girlfriend - now wife - I was so nervous and scared and sweaty thinking no way in hell do I have a chance with her. She was wiping the counter and saw me and flashed a big beautiful smile and all fear, nervousness, everything that could sabotage me - just disappeared. I talked to her and I knew that asking her phone number would be pushing it, so I asked her for her email address or if she had an instant messenger. We continued talking through ICQ. Then we started dating and the rest is history. 😃❤️👍

MrOracle · Answer

Yes, I've seen it happen, but it's pretty rare. Most guys who either don't feel that they have what she needs, or aren't in a position to give her enough time or attention or dates, etc., then most guys will just tell her straight out that he can't give her what she needs and that she should move on. It's really a rare exception that the guy will just sabotage the relationship instead - but, yes, it does happen, rarely.

Red-Blaze · Answer

Abslotly, had a few friends I talk to that just go "I am not worth X.." and stuff
I always hate it, just say if they think they are not... Yet they should work on them self, but they so worth it most times, and should stop with thinking there worth less

Literalbillionaire17 · Answer

YES. My uncle used to do it all the time. He would get into relationships with these amazing women and as soon as it got serious he fucked it up.

He later admitted that he had major mommy issues and then women he got with were too good to for him bc of that

hafinjun · Answer

probably but only if they're idiots, in my opinion if she's gone as far as to go out with you and isn't willing to do it again it would be a good idea to do whatever you can to see that she keeps going out with you maybe you're worth more than you think romantically.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Oh, absolutely.

But... it's also a test to see if she will actually accept us at our lowest. We want to find this out now, because we want to know if she is someone who we can truly count on and who will be loyal through thick and thin if we marry her.

Sparks32 · Answer

Yes to some degree. It's also hard to watch other men flirt with your hot girlfriend in front of you. Also very attractive women are often very high maintenance and I get very tired of thier high expectations of me.

Anonymous · Answer

Not heard of that, but I know a guy who self sabotaged because he didn't want to date the girl anymore.

They worked at the same place and she had friends there and he didn't want them giving him a hard time if he dumped her. So he deliberately treated her mean in smaller ways so that she would dump him. It worked, she dumped him and he looked like the poor victim lol

DermalPunch · Answer

No, men don't think this way. He doesn't want the responsibility. He just not into the woman. She isn't worth giving up whatever he feels he will lose (freedom money, silence etc).

Faith18letsgo · Answer

Definitely I’m not a guy but I be doing that shit. Subconsciously trying to rip off the band aid sooner.

rienna888 · Answer

Hmm I think that’s possible. I do that too. I would act kinda crazy because I think might as well. If they’re attracted to me they will be cool with it. Then they don’t wanna see me again. That’s when I know I fucked up

Messianic_Monk · Answer

It all comes down to confidence. If we aren't confident, we'll end up being our worst enemy and end up fulfilling our own prophecy.

BlueScorpio · Answer

Yes it's possible. They may feel like they aren't good enough or get scared cause they aren't use to that kind of person or relationship.

Guy13 · Answer

Some men are very immature and spend their life doing that in all things. It has nothing to do with the girl.

AdithyaR · Answer

I'm guilty of this. I had a relationship with a girl like that but I knew I was not good enough so I broke it off. Hopefully she'll meet someone actually worthy of her.

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

To the contrary, it's the opposite.  Besides, why ruin a good thing going?

Mangospacho · Answer

I don’t know. I’ve never dated someone I thought was too good for me. They thought they were too good for me but I didn’t think they were too good for me.

UniquelyBasic · Answer

Sometimes even before they start dating and just asking the girl out they will sabotage it.

exitseven · Answer

Yes, there are people who have low self esteem for a variety of reasons.

AimeeKyle · Answer

Sometimes. Easier on their personal feelings if they quit vs the girl dumping you (if in fact that happens)

Anonymous · Answer

Sadly, a lot of men are their own worst enemy.

Heolurt · Answer

They do it because they know, she's just waiting to trade up, no such this as a loyal female anymore.

Jay3344 · Answer

I would say yes, some men do. It’s definitely an issue with women too.

DiegoO · Answer

It can happen. Having mountains of insecurities, doesn't help you have healthy relationships.

Pudsmucker · Answer

Also think they self-sabotage if they're not interested in you.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

Yes some men do I have a friends that does it. I always ask him if that's what your gonna do then why bother dating at all

disgustingweebtrash · Answer

I think women are more guilty of self sabotage than men

Anonymous · Answer

If you put me, a guy that is 5'5 and looks 10 years younger than he actually is, I think I have a legitimate reason to assume a girls is too good for me, I mean let's be real here.

Anonymous · Answer

I'm sure there are some guys who do that, but it's not common.

Monalisa77 · Answer

I don't know but i do it

Wish4UrB00ty · Answer

Absolutly! It is our greatest defeat

Avicenna · Answer

Maybe, but it’s rare

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

I think it's self sabotaging to think that way.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

I've never self sabatoged for any reason.

CallmeTheKnight · Answer

By being an idiot, yea

In_Trance · Answer

I suppose it's possible but I doubt it

Truthfullguy · Answer

Unfortunately yes some of us do

melanieeeB · Answer

Definitely some do

artsy_dragon · Answer

I don't think so

sheikalana · Answer

Facts!

Akam93 · Answer

Maybe.

britishbby · Answer

Pretty much

Minahh · Answer

I believe some do

AngryCarl · Answer

Yes.

panamared1 · Answer

It happens

Anonymous · Answer

I don't know.

Anonymous · Answer

women do too

Anonymous · Answer

Mostly yes.

Do some men self sabotage when they think the girl they are seeing is too good for them?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Do some men self sabotage when they think the girl they are seeing is too good for them?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.