Why won't my child's father pay his child support?

[Angieg03]

My child's father is ordered to pay $75 per MONTH. He is $10,000 behind and refuses to pay. I do not understand. He has been ordered to pay $75 for many years now and my child will be 18 years old in a couple months. What is wrong with this guy?

[LiamJHayden]

In NC the state is empowered to seize his property and garnish his pay. That is 11 years in arrears. I think NC has a 10 year SOL for this, so you might only get ten years of back support, but that is still $9000 you do not have now. Here are some options for help:

https://www.divorcenet.com/resources/child-support-enforcement-north-carolina.html#:~:text=If%20the%20obligor%20parent%20fails,in%20some%20circumstances%2C%20jail%20time.

[Fireguy17]

His actions pretty much tell you what kind of person he really is.
You should be able to get the state involved, they have better resources than you have.
You should look into what help is available to you.
I know our state is pretty aggressive on dead beat moms and dads.

[leahzrc]

my dad wad like that, he abandoned us like we were nothing. i don't know how someone who once started a family couldnt finish it

[Makeushiver]

Because he's a sleaze bag. If he works or has any income you can probably get the court to garnish his wages. Hang onto any evidence you have of him referring to his or your ( both of you) child. That may be how he would try to get away with it. DNA tests would show for sure. If the child is very young avoiding $75/month will appeal to him. This is a case where an attorney with a track record in these cases would help/ If/when you get one try to get all of his fees paid by a lawsuit, make sure you have a clause that includes cost of living increases. My guess would be when he sees legal letterhead he will give you some money "as good will" and try to convince you that you can both work it without any ;legal action. Don't buy it.. As soon as the threat disappears so will his goodwill. If this is the result of him talking you into going bareback instead of having to wear a condom really screw him

[MrOracle]

If we asked HIM why he won't pay, what do you think HIS reasons would be? It's very difficult in cases like this when we only hear one side of the story.

[Angieg03]

He is only ordered to pay $75 per month. It doesn't matter what his reasons are for not paying. He still need to take care of his child. I have a mortgage, light bill, and other bills to pay and I keep my daughter 100% of the time. i don't know too many women that will stand by and let the father of their child get away with only paying $75 a month for child support and he was ordered to pay that when my daughter wasn't even in school now she about to graduate.

[Angieg03]

wasn't in school meaning when she was still a small child..

[MrOracle]

The fact that you think his reasons don't matter is quite telling. His reasons absolutely matter, even if they are wrong. You dismissing his point of view is likely the very reason he refuses to pay.

[ShesRad80]

not willing to except responsibility when clearly could have spent a few bucks for condoms instead of dealing with a kid he didn't wanna take care of

[Agape93]

Last time you said it was like $70 a month, for three kids over 11 years. @PrettyPriya

[PrettyPriya]

Discounted rate?

Why won't my child's father pay his child support? ↗

[Agape93]

I wonder how fast she will delete this to try and keep the troll going lol

[Anonymous Asker]

I ain't deleting nothing and I am not trolling. Why keep responding if you think I am trolling are you following me? You know you don't have to respond right?

[Agape93]

Considering you keep changing the details of your stories, yeah that counts as trolling. So as a moderator, I'm letting you know now to knock it off.

[Anonymous Asker]

I have three children. One dad pays $75 per month and the other pays $50 per month, neither of them pay and hasn't for years. Women can have children by different men, you know.

[Agape93]

A likely story. I've never heard of child support being that low, nor two separate baby daddies having such low payments that they still refuse to pay for years. Your story doesn't make sense.

[Anonymous Asker]

@PrettyPriya yep that's me. As stated I have more than father to my children, with different orders.

[PrettyPriya]

Gotcha. I didn't see that mentioned anywhere until now.

[Anonymous Asker]

I clicked on your profile and see nothing as you being a moderator. You the one keep following me and responding to my posts and looking like a stalker, I posted anonymous. You do not have to respond. Why are you following me even as me being anonymous question? You should mind your business you are the troll following people.

[Agape93]

The M next to my picture is where it says it, my profile doesn't need to. Also when you post publicly, it ends up in the live section, showing me every new post, even yours. So yes I will comment like I do several others.

Also, my profile is private. Nice try.

[Agape93]

Now if you mean Priya, hers is a U, and her profile does say she a moderator.

[PrettyPriya]

I sincerely hope that last comment is not directed at me. I have not responded to a single post (other than this one) of yours. I responded to this because my username was tagged.

I am a moderator. That 'u' on my profile pic stands for Uber Moderator. My bio also states I am a moderator. I simply said that I didn't see that you had mentioned multiple fathers anywhere. No need to be rude.

[Anonymous Asker]

M can mean anything. Plenty of words start with an M. I don't care if you are a moderator. Your profile is private mine is not. Why is your shit private? You following me calling me a troll? So all you do is look at questions ALL DAY posted on this forum and get on people's profiles and call them trolls. What a professional moderator.
Then you tell me to knock it off when I ask two different questions and copy a link to my previous question trying to embarrass me. I am a grown ass woman. You need to grow up and quit being a jerk.

[Agape93]

On here, M, S, U are moderators. A are admins.
Correct it is, because I made it private.

Also, again, I'm not following you. You pop up in my live feed like everyone else. And like several people, I will comment, even on someone I suspect is trolling.

Confronting those I believe are breaking rules does not make me a jerk. You don't need to agree nor do I care if you agree.

[Agape93]

Also you've no right to bitch about my profile being private when you're anon, and I can't even see your profile name lol

[Anonymous Asker]

First of all I ain't breaking no rules. I asked two separate questions. You came on my post and called me a troll. I responded to your name calling. You are very unprofessional. I don't care if you are a moderator you called me a name on my post. I don't see how the hell you became a moderator getting on people's post and calling them names. I do not know who you are and you don't know me. I would call you something else but I am trying to be the bigger person here.

[Agape93]

It sure looks like trolling to me, and calling one a troll is not name calling. It's assigning a label based on perceived conduct. Like you calling me a jerk because you assume I'm being one.

Also honey, I'm a volunteer. I don't need to be professional. But I became one because I know what I'm doing. If I didn't, I would not have become one.

[Billlewis]

I just started following you and I'd like to invite you to follow or message me as well, if that's alright. Thank you very much.

[inhua]

maybe he found out he's paying child support for a kid that's not his

[Angieg03]

How is it court ordered child support if the kid ain't his. That's the first thing the Court does is a DNA test. You crazy as hell.

[inhua]

depends on which state but most courts don't. it is up to the parents to request a DNA test

[BeMuse]

Apparently you didn't really need the money you just wanted it. Kid made it to 18 without it.

[spartan55]

What state are you in? Is this court ordered support?

[Angieg03]

NC, yes it is court ordered child support.

[spartan55]

Can he not be arrested and thrown in jail. Some states send his tax return directly to you if he is in arrears. He is a piece of shit for not supporting his child. $75? Pffft I pay $520 per month and I am happy to.

[Angieg03]

Well, it is court ordered. Social Services helps with my child support because I get state assistance. My daughter will be 18 in a couple days. When she was born he was ordered to pay close to $300. He got pissed cause it was $300 quit his job, took me back to court and the judge reduced it to $75 because he quit his job and couldn't pay, so he was ordered to pay the bare minimum $75. This has been since 2004 or 2005.
He hold a job until his wages are garnished and then he quit. He will work a couple months then quit. I am so tired. She is 18 and I worked and took care of my children all by myself, I have medical issues now and can't work. My daughter had to get a job. I really hate him and don't understand why he won't support his child and why the system is not helping me. He is a piece of shit.

[Anonymous]

he's a loser. Thats not even a lot of money. He must not have been earning anything when you had the baby. You should've vetted your men better if you wanted finances.

[Angieg03]

You are right. I should have chosen better men. He was working right until the Court ordered him to pay child support. When the Court ordered him to pay and that first payment came out his check he quit. Then went back to Court and got his child support reduced to $75 per month cause he quit his job.

[LiamJHayden]

The real question is why you kept choosing losers who only got ordered to pay $50 or $70 per month?

[Sparkie460]

If he's that far behind you should tell your lawyer. He can take him to court and have his pay garnished. Obviously he is a deadbeat dad.

[SoJust]

a good question, in fact, the laws should be done whatever it takes

[mommymommymommy]

If he refuses to pay that's against court order, you should sue him

[Anonymous]

Well if he's going to be an adult in a couple months in a couple months there should be no need to anymore. Right?

[Anonymous]

Because he can get away with it... hasn't paid in what 11 years

[Angieg03]

You are right, he has gotten away with it. For many years. In all honesty he went longer than 11 years without paying.

[Pterodon]

Why haven’t you gone to child support enforcement?

[msc545]

Did you keep him from seeing his child? If so - THAT is why.

[Agape93]

Why haven't you taken him to court

[Angieg03]

They claim they can't serve him papers to go to court if they can not find him.

[Agape93]

Hire a private investigator then. They'll find him

[Angieg03]

I can't afford it. If I can pay to hire an investigator why would I need child support?

[Agape93]

It isn't too expensive, just budget it out. You've had how long now to save up and get this all done? At least 11 years.

@OlderAndWiser any legal advice? I have some not so legal advice, so you're the better option

[Angieg03]

I was also a single mom of three with mortgage, light bill, grocery, car note... etc. I don't know if you have ever raised three kids on a one person budget but it is very hard. I should not have to hire a private investigator, that's why the Court System is there.

[Agape93]

Wait, three kids and his child support was only 75 a month? Something smells off, big time here.

[OlderAndWiser]

Most guys assume that the chld support obligation just disappears when the child reaches age 18, and then they re-appear. The obligation does not disappear. Get him served when reappears.

Also, try callin your local Legal Aid to see if they can help.

[Angieg03]

I got one child with him. One child $75.

[Angieg03]

I got one child with him, $75.

[Pterodon]

You don’t but it’s not allowing him to be a deadbeat

[sheikalana]

So he's in debt? He needs to pay.

[Sparkie460]

Because he's a lowlife deadbeat

[Pterodon]

Because he’s a deadbeat criminal

[In_Trance]

75.00 per month? WTF

[Angieg03]

Yes, $75 per month. He won't even pay that. I do not understand why he will not pay. My daughter wants nothing to do with him.

[Billlewis]

You deserve better.

[Anonymous]

That's just sad.

[riverrat3]

Take him to court

[Angieg03]

Can't take him to Court if they can't find him to serve him papers, so that's what they say.

[riverrat3]

Do it any way, it will be on record, he may get pulled over for something

[Anonymous]

That is so low

[Angieg03]

no...