Whats a better way of playing it cool when letting a guy down?

[Puppystarfish23]

Today at work this guy I've never spoken to kept trying to make small talk to me.

I've seen him around and he seems okayish. I spoke to him once before and he acted really strange I thought he didn't like me but I think he was just really nervous.

He asked me how old I was and I said 25 he acted really shocked and said but he thought I was 18. I know I look young but not that young he was just trying to butter me up. He said "I bet its awkward when you get chatted up by really young guys" I said "not really I usually get dirty old men"

He said "well at least your someone's type here" I said "I have a boyfriend so I guess I'm someone's type "🫣😳

After that he walked away and stopped talking to me. I felt super embarrassed as I'm not used to guys being that forward with me and he was actually decent for a change.

Obviously I have a boyfriend who I love very much and I only have eyes for him really. I've been with my boyfriend for 4 years and we have a house together and everything so to my generation I'm practically a married woman.

When I told my friends they were kinda shocked too. They had nothing but nice things to say about him and apparently a lot of girls fancy him but he doesn't talk to many people.

Apparently he's a proper gentleman too. One of my female friends went out drinking with him and some others on a night out and she got a little wasted and apparently he looked after her the entire night.

After all that I felt a little flattered but I don't fancy this guy at all he's only 20 and I have a man who I'm crazy about just felt like I was super awkward and I could have handled it better.

Maybe I led him on because he plays pool in the canteen and my friend Anna likes to watch and I sometimes sit with her but I have no interest and I never even noticed them playing I was just sitting with my friend who was but maybe he thought I was interested

[RangerBlue22]

He said "well at least your someone's type here" I said "I have a boyfriend so I guess I'm someone's type

The way you handled that wasn’t 100% wrong but not a 100% right either. You likely had a defensive tone in your voice you said that and didn’t realize it. But he heard it alright.

If he was being really aggressive that would of been a proper response. However when decent guys approach girls we most often have no idea if:

• if you are in a bad mood or not
• if you are taken or not
• last but not least if you like us or not

So he stuck his neck out and you overreacted (a bit). A better reaction would of been “hey you are sweet but I have to let you know I have a boyfriend”. That would show you respected the position he’s in but also communicate the position you are in.

Now if he was making sexual comments and/or being rude then bring up “I’m taken” right away if you don’t want to hear it.

[stepyo99]

To me it seems like you handled it fine. You let him know you're taken. End of story. It can be frustrating to learn that somebody you were interested in has rejected you, so I can understand his reaction, but he'll get over it, and if he doesn't that just means you avoided somebody with some mental issues.

[Pinay_ako]

Telling them you’re taken should be enough to let them down respectfully and easy. If they still push it, then it’s time to be firm. He’s a big boy. He can and should handle the truth. Find someone else

[leahzrc]

You said the right thing if he is salty about it don't be his friend

[mommymommymommy]

If you have a boyfriend, or even if you don't, you just tell him "i have a boyfriend". If he still doesn't back off, then get someone else involved, even if it's the cops, since then it becomes stalking

I have a friend who has a guy who's harassing her, when she's clearly shown she's not interested

[Shy_Steve]

It's okay, Just talk to him more and ask him if he likes any other Girls you know and encourage him to Approach them and help him get a date with another Girl unless you just ignore him, But that will look rude not only by him but by other People.

[OlderAndWiser]

Your response was fine. I am wondering if you are bothered because the attention from this guy gave you some reason to consider the possibilities. That happens sometimes, even in committed relationships.

[saint_reezy]

He seems like a confident guy, im sure he’ll get over it. Unless he was like “theres no way she has a boyfriend” i totally got this. 😂 jk

[bowenw]

I suggest next time you see him to apologize for being abrupt with him. You could say he caught you off-guard.

[Andres77]

Sounds like you can think on your feet. U handled it well

[BoopBoopBeep]

I think you handled it well.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

Tell him you only date your cousins!

[baseball_del_tuono]

I don’t see the problem here