Drunkenly made out with a guy in the friend group and need an outside opinion?

[maynatalia135]

Basically, went out 4 nights ago with a group of my guy friends to a club. We had 3 guys there and me. One of the guys (we’ll refer to him as A) and I split from the other 2 at the end of the night to go grab food. While we were eating, A was asking me if I’d made out with any of the guys there that night and when I told him I did, A went into this whole ramble about how I should look for better guys, that I deserve better than to just kiss guys at the club, and even complimented me. (A insults me left and right on a usual day and I return the insults). Then asked me about my history with guys, A’s always had a weird interest in the guys I get with because in his words, he “can’t imagine me being intimate with anyone”. A was telling me all this after he was with few girls that night as well. We got on the train to go home that night from the club and I was starting to fall asleep but wasn’t fully asleep and I saw A look at me and smile at my sleepy self. I didn’t think anything of this until the following day, me, A, and another one of our friends decided to go on a day trip out and so we spent the entire day together. (A was the one who invited me, not the other guy) at the end of the day we decided to go drinking. Needless to say I had way too much and A was also wasted. We sat somewhere and all of the sudden A was kissing me. For whatever reason, I thought it was a good idea to go along with this in my drunk state. We came back to the apartment complex we both live in and instead of going back to the rooms we decided to go on a walk. We sat there and A told me he didn’t like that hearing about me being with other people, that he’s been wanting to kiss me for so long, kept grabbing me by the waist to pull me in for kisses while I kept telling him all the reasons we can’t be doing this (since we share a friend group and things would get messy, more than it already is).

Updates

+1 y

last week he was telling me he knows exactly what to say&will say anything just to get her interested. The conflict is that I know this is a huge red flag, I dont believe anything he said that night but he would be smiling at my sleeping when he didn’t know I saw him and would smack my thighs multiple times.

Updates

+1 y

Would go out of his way to switch seats with me after a weird guy sat next to me on the train&would move me by the waist to swap places w me when a guy was coughing behind me both times without me asking and way before the drunk make out.

[Anonymous]

If I were you I’d make that night a first and last. From everything you said, A sounds like a player and treated you as a conquest, having wanted to kiss you for so long. I think it’s great that he looks out for you when you’re out, all women need to be safe when drinking and it’s helpful to have a guy there who won’t let anything bad happen to you.


Still, that only speaks to who he is as a friend, not a boyfriend. I don’t want to slam his intentions completely because I know that some men are capable of changing for the right woman, but someone like him would have some real proving to do. Speaking of which, it can’t even get to that point if he’s someone you can’t date. I’ve let things get too far with a guy from my old friend group before, we were in a relationship for 5 months and ultimately broke up.


It ruined my dynamic with our friends because I was trying to give myself space to get over him before hanging out normally, but it really put a strain on my friendships. I’d try to hang out with the separately from him, but he was invited to every outing and only didn’t go if he wasn’t available, which was like never lol. All this to say I wouldn’t recommend risking this outcome for a guy who has the track record that A has.

[DaveJord]

So here is the thing, regardless of if he is genuinely interested or not, I assure you he is trying to get laid.

Doesn't mean it could not lead to something more or that he is only interested in sex. But if was interested in more he would still want sex. If all he wanted was sex, he would still want sex... so whether or not he is trying to get laid is not the question... nor should it have any part of the discussion.
now I was not there.
So the real question is is he really genuinely interested in you as a person. The answer is who knows, you have to work that out with him directly and nobody else.

I think he is genuinely interested in something, but he does not sound like a gentleman. Sounds like he is trying to take advantage of the situation. All I can say is that if you do not share any feelings for this guy ona romantic level you need to stay way from him... definitely never go drinking again with him.

[RHK36]

So what's the question because you didn't really have one?

[maynatalia135]

I need an outside opinion, can’t tell if he’s actually into me or just looking to hook up.

[mommymommymommy]

Which proves guys and girls really can't be "just friends". I've always known it, girls just can't admit it

[DextroShade]

This is why men and women can't just be friends, guys don't really want to be your friend.

[Anonymous]

Little possessive isn’t he. Not good. But he played the game and got you. So good luck

[In_Trance]

So, do you have a question?

[maynatalia135]

I need an opinion, I can’t make sense of any of this and can’t tell if he genuinely even likes me

[In_Trance]

He wants to rail you... no doubt about it. He's jerked off to you countless times.