I'M CONFUSED ON OUR RELATIONSHIP? PLEASE HELP?

[Anonymous]

3.5 years into my friends with benefits, He has started teasing me about loving him. I tell him I like him when he does this. I mean I do, I couldnt sleep with the same person for so long with out liking them to an extent. We never hang out alone except for random hook ups. We dont discuss anything outside of our bedroom time. But we text daily, 7 days a week. He sent a kissy face emoji for the 1st time last month. (It's been 3.5 years!) Should I consider about seriously thinking about if we should be official. Should I see if we can making it official to everyone or am I over thinking the situation?

Also Men, Why the teasing about me loving him and kissy faces all of a sudden?

[RedInnocent68]

Sounds like he really likes you and probably would be interested in a deeper commitment. Three and a half years is a long time to not be official. Have you both been seeing other people?

[Asker]

Yes, we have. But no one knows about us. Our friend group doesn't have the slightest idea. We don't get close, or even acknowledge any sort of relationship between us when anyone is around besides the few inuendos whispered when no one can hear.
When we started seeing eachother we agreed strictly bedroom fun no feelings or anything like that. It's been a ton of fun. But just recently the teasing me about loving him has come along. And like I said he sent the 😘 one morning and thats when I started questioning our relationship. Part of me says he only does it o be flirty. Part of me is says "maybe he's trying to hint that he has love for me but doesn't want to say it so he's trying to get me to admit it first or at least admit" another part of me thinks "He's got to be testing me to see if I crossed our agreement and caught feeling"... Im so confused.
Can a man who strictly wanted just physical fun compartmentalize between just fun and feelings after 3.5 years? 3.5 years is a long time, there's times where I feel delusional and think maybe I love him but then I'm like "the brains thinking too much after we fool around" it's the post sexual brain/feelings and then I get over it.
Am I really overthinking this? And if not, then why won't he just say it?

[RedInnocent68]

You’re not overthinking. You’ve also sort of answered your own question. ‘Can a man who strictly wanted just physical fun compartmentalize between just fun and feelings after 3.5 years?’ Of course! friends with benefits is kind of a cop out for commitmentphobes. No one does something (someone) for 3.5 years because they don’t have feelings about it (them). Sounds like you’re the same. Frankly, I think the common attitude of insisting that no one has feelings all the time is kind of stupid. What’s so wrong with having feelings anyway? I mean, we’re not just lower-order animals like tortoises… You’re also probably being naive that your friends don’t see it too, if they’re whispering and teasing.(innuendos). I mean, they’d be pretty dense (and not very good) friends if they couldn’t see it too after 3.5 years!