What to do you with a guy who is self sabotaging each time we get closer?

[Anonymous]

[HollyK21]

I would back off from him. He’s either avoiding a relationship with you or going to make you pay for what someone else did in one way or another. It’s nothing against him as a person, but it’s like if I know I am not a cheater, trustworthy, loyal, yet being treated like I’m the one who did him wrong then I’m done. I’ve healed my past issues, so I need a man who’s put all that behind him as well and can give me a clean slate, just as I give him.

[Asker]

Love your answer my dear.. I needed this. I already had 6 months of no contact and he came back. So now it’s ride or die I guess.
We are very close emotionally… I give him a last chance but I will focus on myself now.

[Asker]

He seems to have avoidant attachment.

[HollyK21]

Yeah and that’s just not a good idea because if you feel healed from your past and he’s not then I believe he will regress you back to toxicity since he can’t offer anything healthier. So while I’m sure you like him, it’s better to date someone mentally ready. It’s just far too exhausting paying for what other women did when you’re innocent.

[Asker]

Yes I won’t wait for him anymore…that’s what I decided 6 months ago and now I’m observing how he ll behave. I won’t loose more energy and time into this if it’s not evolving quickly…

Thank you for you kind words :)

[HollyK21]

No worries love!

[Alex-Snow]

Move on

[Anonymous]

Talk to him