My avoidant ex is dead cold to me yet asks to meet?

[Anonymous]

I rejected up with himand he is annoyed on the same years later. he is a dismissive avoidant. While he doesn’t want to date me, he will ensure all my other dates are broken.

However he keeps breadcrumbinv me in between to see if I’m there. The moment he realises I’m, he would run.

it was too much for me to handle that now I’m detached from him. I feel nothing.

It had come to a point where now I simply ACT like I take the crumbs while feeling nothing but happily moving with my life and work.

[Oliverlogan263]

Hey, that sounds like a really messy situation. Your ex seems kinda toxic keeping you on the back burner like that while also sabotaging your other dates. Not cool at all.

Honestly, I'd say keep your distance from him as much as you can. The fact that you feel nothing for him now is probably a good thing - means you're protecting yourself from getting hurt again.

If he asks to meet up, I'd be real skeptical of his intentions. Most likely he just wants to see if he still has a hold on you or make sure you're not moving on. Don't give him the satisfaction of knowing he still gets to you, you feel me?

My advice would be keep acting like you don't care but don't actually go meet him. Replies can be short, like "sorry, busy." Dude sounds like drama waiting to happen. You deserve way better than being some guy's backup plan.

Stay focused on you and feeling good without him. The best revenge is living well, right? Soon he'll realize he's not getting what he wants from you - your attention - and hopefully leave you alone for good. Keep ballin' sista!

[StarWarGirl]

You need to stay strong and fight for yourself. You can't let anyone to control your life as they feel good.

Keep it simple. Like "You can't commit to me? Fine so you are no one to me bye".

[centeredness]

are women sexually attracted to men or a specific person? Are women not built to experience attraction to strangers, are women's sexual attraction limited only to their well known person?


Often hear girls say they are sexually attracted to men and also say they don’t experience sexual attraction if they don’t have a connection with the person. I am confused with that. It’s means single girls who have no male circle are like asexual until they make a connection? If you are single girl then men are invisible to you? It’s like the way straight men see another men, women also see another men in the same way?
How long does it take for a women to feel sexual attraction? Do single women have sexual attraction?
Is sexual attraction choice for women? I am really confused. Women claim they don’t feel sexual attraction without getting to know the person, without knowing his personality, without knowing his identity, without any interaction, without knowing who he is as a person.
Sexual attraction will happen after finishing/fulfilling the prerequision (get to know, social interaction, get to know perrsonality).
Before fulfilling these prerequisions their brain don’t register unknown guys the way straight men's braing don’t register guys. If somehow the guy become familiar with them then there is a chance girls can feel sexual attraction but it’s totally unpredictable.
So, for heterosexual women at the first place seeing/looking at men is like looking at their own brother, sister (totally platonic sense).
At the first place, is there any difference when straight guys look at another guys vs asexual look at another guys and straight women look at another guys?
So, you can easily choose not to feel sexual attraction in your entire life. If get to know doesn’t happen sexual attraction will not happen. Before get to know someone there no sexual attraction so, you have to consciously make a move in order to get to know someone because there is no Instinctive sexual attraction at the first place.
Another thing is, they say they are sexually attracted to men but they never been sexually attracted to men who is not their familiar, colleague, boyfriend, friend or well known.
A single girl say she is straight, she is sexually attracted to men but she never felt sexually attracted to men who is not her well known. What does it mean? So, if a girl want to feel sexual attraction she has to spend time with a guy consciously to know whether she feels sexual attraction or not. There is no primal, instinctive sexual attraction to men exist?