Is being autistic worse then being nerdy?

[Anonymous]

Like it seems that in the hierarchy normally nerds and geeky people get made fun of but if your autistic you immediately take the place at the bottom of the scale and it seems that being that is even worse then being nerdy

[Anonymous]

Autistic experience differs from person to person. If the autistic person is more attractive, they’re seen as mysterious. If they’re more unattractive, they’re seen as weird. I’m guessing you’re living as an unattractive autistic person.

Being nerdy is not stigmatized anymore, so no. They don’t fall in the same category. I’m autistic and quite socially inept but honestly don’t care. I think you care too much. It may be hard not to, but it’s either you work on your socialization, or you live life not caring.

[Asker]

I really don’t know what I’m living as because I don’t have any friends or no girlfriend and really it’s been like that my whole life

[Opinion Owner]

Same. It’s just apart of having autism though. Not much you can do besides force yourself out of your comfort zone.

[jahaims]

Autistic people fall on a spectrum. We all vary greatly.

[osmanthus]

Worse. In what way?

[Asker]

Like worse in a social setting cause I notice nerdy people get treated better then me

[osmanthus]

If you're neurodivergent, then that's all this is. If you were fully autistic and unable to function, then yes, it would be bad because you can't take care of yourself and it's usually harder for autistics to 'be-in-the-know' about what's popular. I wouldn't worry about being social with these people you seem to care about. They have nothing better to do and you have all the time in the world to carve for yourself a career. I'm guessing you're still in high school or college or other, but even if not, there is a space for you out ther to socialize and not be judged harshly.

[osmanthus]

You can report these people for bullying you, if they are doing so.

[Asker]

Well 2 so I do go to a university but also at my job as well my glaring social deficiencies shine very bright especially when people break off into small groups or people in the room start conversating and the whole time I’m looking around like a deer in the headlights

[osmanthus]

Have you tried a social skills course? It exists.

If you're not naturally a very sociable person, then in no way do you need to go out of your way to make friends with everybody but you'll need to be able to work in a time or at least function as a team player, if you want a job or career that requires that.

[osmanthus]

*correction: work in a team or at least function as a team player

[Asker]

So I can function but I notice that people either don’t want me in their group or they don’t invite me to stuff

[osmanthus]

If they are tasked to work with you, well, they'll have to suck it up. If it isn't mandatory, you don't have to choose them or wait for them to choose you. I don't need people to invite me to stuff. I wish most people mostly didn't invite me to their lame parties because it's more time, money, and energy wasted on people I don't care for; if you've tried attending 3 parties in a row every week then you'll probably tire of it eventually. I'll go out when I damn well feel like it to meet whomsoever I want. You don't have to associate with them nor they you.

[Anonymous]

It’s an illness, totally different

[Asker]

Your right but us people on the spectrum have horrible social skills like we simply don’t know what to do because it doesn’t come natural