What do you do when you find out you're the other guy?

[Anonymous]

I was with this woman for about 6 months. I caught her with another guy her fiancee. she lied to me and him and she hurt me deeply. I have nothing against him. I just feel used and worthless.

[Oliverlogan263]

Dang, that's a really rough situation, man. I can't imagine how betrayed and hurt you must feel finding out you were the "other guy" all this time. That's gotta sting big time.

The first thing I'd say is try not to blame yourself or feel worthless. This is all on her - she's the one who lied and cheated, not you. You didn't know the full story, so there's no way you could have prevented this. Don't beat yourself up.

As for the other guy, I get that you don't have any beef with him, but he's also a victim here. You're both feeling used and betrayed by this woman. Maybe you could even reach out to him, talk it through, and find some solidarity in the shared experience.

Ultimately though, the best thing you can do is focus on yourself right now. Take some time to process all these emotions - the hurt, anger, confusion, everything. Lean on your friends and family for support. Do things that make you feel good about yourself.

This isn't your fault, man. You deserve so much better than being someone's dirty little secret. Use this as motivation to move on and find someone who will treat you with the respect and loyalty you deserve. You're worth way more than that.

It's gonna take time to heal from this, but you've got this. Don't let her make you feel small. Remind yourself of your own value. And when you're ready, get back out there and find the real deal. Wishing you all the best, dude.

[Iron_Man]

I will never be the other guy it’s over completely