Why is she so nervous around me?

[Anonymous]

Why is she so nervous around me? I try talking to this girl but she seems very nervous. I'm very calm, cool, smiling and friendly toward her. She comes off as very compulsive when I'm around like acting weird. She doesn't always look me in the eye except when she talks to me. Then she'll mention stuff that I have that she doesn't like or why did I pick it. Its too bad because I really like her too. If I go over to her and just talk, she kinda just keeps carrying on...

Updates

+1 y

Thanks for the answers, ultimate question(s). Should I still go see/talk to her? I normally go every day (its on the way home for work and I look at deals), or should I break up in seeing her every other day? Twice/thrice a week?

[Living-the-ADvenTURe]

Ok, I briefly read a bit of the other stuff. I'm quite sure you believe youreslf that she likes you already. It does seem that she is a shy girl, and I'll tell you exactly how to deal with one of those.

Shy girls usually need to take things very slowly. It gives them time to gradually start feeling more comfertable around a guy and then there's much more chances of her accepting a date from you. I say keep seeing her, but not every day. Don't develope any kind of pattern so she can predict your coming. It will make her wonder where you are and if your still going to come. If she is interested in you, mabe she was too shy to accept a date, but then later wished she was brave enough to exept it. Not always showing up may give her more of an initiative to accepting a date because she won't know if she'll have another chance again or not to accept. Also, it won't creep her out. You may or may not creep her at, but you may want to be careful with that.

Sorry to say, but sometimes too much is too much. I once new a guy who liked me and I kinda liked him, but then when I told him where I lived, he took that as an invitation to come see me whenever. Each day after school, my house was on his way home, so he would stop by all the time. It made me feel uncomfertable and I became creeped out by him rather then into him. It's good to show interest, but not too much. Just try to take it easy and not show too much. some

About you visiting her at work; some girls don't even like bringing their boyfriends to their work, because they feel they should be working and not socialising. Try befriending her some place else mabe and rather then asking her to hang out, find something you think would be good for you guys to do together and tell her you'd like to do that with her sometime, maybe even include that she can bring a few friends along. Try giving her an excuse for not to feel nervous about excepting. I once wrote an article on here all about how to approach a shy girl. It was featured. I wonder if it's still on here...I look into it and let you know, it would be good for you I think. If you have any questions about what I just wrote or anything, I'll be glad to answer. Hope this helps.

[Living-the-ADvenTURe]

Ok, here's where to find the article https://www.girlsaskguys.com/articles/Flirting/How-Can-You-Get-a-Shy-Girl-to-Open-Up.html but I haven't read it in a long time so I can't even remember if that will help your situation at all or if it is completly irrelevent. Anyway, you'll find it interesting.

[Asker]

Thanks for the input! I don't always go to see her. Like when she tells me when she's working or how late, I won't necessarily show up. But during the week its somewhat consistent.

[blueyedgrll]

Ok, well I tried reading the majority of the comments on the answers to get a better idea of what's going on. It's really hard to tell though. I mean some of her actions point to her having some interest in you, but then again her saying no to doing something doesn't go along with everything else. You say she's a shy girl, that could be the reason she wasn't so quick to say yes to hanging out with you. At work she's sort of in a comfort zone, around people she knows. I think that you are moving to quickly by asking to do something. I would ask for her phone number and if it would be ok if you could call her sometime. Just be sure if she does give it to you not to harrass her with phone calls. Once or twice in a week is good enough for now. Let her come to you is the key, because she's shy. If she says no to giving you her number then I would call it quits. Right now you just want to figure out how her actions relate to her feelings. She may like you, mite just be being nice, could be bored at work and enjoys a good flirt/convo, or she could like you but just not be interested in dating at the time. Sooo, ask for her number and if it's ok to call her, and see what happens after that. Another thing, I wouldn't go into the store more than twice a week, or at least use another check out if you must and just give her the casual smile and hey... Otherwise after awhile you may come off as a creeper.

[Asker]

Thanks, I appreciate it. I thought I would go up to her and ask her if I could talk to her after work, or during her break. But she works until midnight sometimes. I found out she might have a bf

[blueyedgrll]

Yea I would make it easier on her and just ask for her number. She's shy and over the phone may feel more comfortable and less intimidating than in person. Also it's a teltale sign if she is interested or not.

[Asker]

Okay thanks. Otherwise should I keep going in to her line and giving her attention? Or should I wait for her to open up more?

[blueyedgrll]

I mean I wouldn't change too much, because if she does like you you'll just confuse her. I would chat with her as normal, but every now and then keep her guessing. Like I said use another check out every once in awhile and just let her know that you noticed her by smiling and saying hi before you walk out. If she gives you her number that's the best way to get her to open up more by talking to her outside of work where she can be a bit more personal with the conversation.

[MordernNature37]

The only way I can get over being nervous around a guy is if I get to know him in a comfortable setting like in a group of people. Is she is as nervous as is sounds then she would not be comfortable with a one on one activity yet. You just have to show her that there is nothing for her to be nervous about. Show her who you are and let her get to know you and she might let you get to see the real her and eventually she will notice that she is comfortable around you. I once was intimidated by this guy but we talked a lot and hung out around each other and then one day I realized that we knew enough about each other that we could accept each other for who we were and that I couldn't remember the last time I felt nervous around him.

It usually means that she likes you if she is nervous around you unless you're just an intimidating person but it doesn't sound like it. She is probably just thinking that she is too nervous around you to try to go for anything. If you really like her be patient and show her that she doesn't need to be nervous because you are human too. That's another thing I usually feel more comfortable if they do something so profoundly human that it's almost embarrassing. I'm not saying that you should embarrass yourself it just and observation.

[Asker]

She always asks questions about what I'm buying and I think makes an effort to find out more. Like pop, she says, "I don't like soda" or some dark chocolate, "I don't like dark chocolate, I love milk chocolate.." I caught her during break once and she was telling me about herself and offered one of her cookies to me. One day I asked if she would like to do something with me sometime and she said "No".

[MordernNature37]

Her telling you her prefrence about what you buying sounds like something I would do with the guy I like. I think she is doing this to give you something to remember about her and take notice. You should somehow find away to show here that you remember what she is saying and taking it all in. Be persitent, and try a different approach. Maybe ask if she wants to do something with friends or if you know of a party that you and your friends are going to give her a head ups and say you should

[MordernNature37]

...tell her she should check it out and hope she shows up with some friends.

[Asker]

I would, I'm kinda new to the area and leaving in a few months (she knows this). Also, I think she might have a boyfriend? So should I keep going in being interested, or should I kinda back off a bit?

[MordernNature37]

Unless you know for sure that she has a boyfriend I would keep going. You could always ask if she is seeing someone. And if your new to area ask her for suggestions to places and then be like o I think you should take me there or would you like to come with.

[DudeMaster]

I was after a girl who behaved this way. For years. She's not interested. She's nervous, but probably because she doesn't know how to let you know she's not interested. If you are clear, then she can be too.

"Look at deals" ? If you visit her at work and she works in retail, then she has to be nice, but she's got nowhere to run if she doesn't like you.

If you want to be sure:

Tell her that you like shy girls who say weird stuff because they're nervous. It's so cute. It's a good sign that they'll be really sweet when you get to know them better.

Then if she keeps saying wack stuff to you say "awww...you say the cutest little things!"

[Asker]

By saying that how do I know then?

[DudeMaster]

She'll be less inhibited about saying stuff to you, because she will feel re-assured rather than feeling that she is going to look stupid.

If she makes more attempts to talk to you, then express you're intent verbally. "I'd love to go see a movie with you, is there anything you're interested in seeing at the moment?" NOT "do something, sometime" - YOu gotta have a plan dude.

[Asker]

Yeah she's been making attempts to talk to me. After I asked her she was saying that all this bleach spilt on her (that I was buying). A few days ago, I was buying cherries, and her attitude always changes around me, she comes off as chipper. I asked how she was doing, she said good. She said she can't wait to go on her break since she needed it.

[DudeMaster]

Bringing up her break is an opening for you to ask her when she's taking it. And meeting her during it. She'll flow a bit more when she feels re-assured. Don't do it too much, or she'll feel that you see her as socially disfunctional.

[Anonymous]

Because she wants you.

[nutmeg1219]

At first it seems a lot like she likes you, from the way you describe how she acts. She seems annoyed by other people, but warms up around you. She seems nervous around you, very common in crushes. These are the typical signs that she likes you.

But, you did say that you asked her out. And she said no. The way I look at this, it could mean 2 things:

1. She liked you, but is too nervous to say yes. She's not that sure of herself, so this could be one possibility.

2. But, I think she probably just wants to be good friends with you. She likes you, but doesn't like you in that way. Is that the vibe you get from her? I would still try talking to her, even when you don't have to buy anything. Gradually build up the friendship. Ask for her number, if she feels comfortable, so you can text her. Talk to her on AIM or MySpace or Facebook. Show her you want to be her friend. If she doesn't reciprocate, I'd move on. If she goes along with it, and she seems into it, and you want to ask her out again, go for it. Otherwise, keep the friendship going. Be someone she can trust.

[Asker]

She's told me some personal stuff about her and her family. I just want to be friends with her but how do you transition from that? I asked if she wanted to do something sometime, that sounded pretty friendly no-string attached to me. I was going to ask for her number if she wanted to do something. I mean, its hard to get your number if you don't want to do anything, right?

I am not sure, the vibe I got was she liked me. I mean she gets squirrelly around me and asks why I buy the stuff I do.

[nutmeg1219]

Okay, well I have to ask, what do you buy?

I think if you just act friendly the transition will be easy. Just ask if you can have her number so you can text her sometimes, no-strings attached.

[Asker]

Food. Mostly for my co-workers, like soda, she asked why I bought so much of it. Then she said she didn't like it. I said it was for my co-workers who have to stay up late, she thought that was nice. Sometimes I buy chocolates. Cereal. Sandwiches, etc.

I thought the best way to get her number is to ask if she wanted to do something? Otherwise what is the point of having her number?

[nutmeg1219]

Well, friends can talk to each other whenever they want to say "Hi." What do you think you're "friendship status" is right now? Are you just aquaintences? Or are you really friends? Just keep increasing the friendliness, without coming on too strong.

[Asker]

We're just aquaintences. We don't really know each other but I;m trying to change that. I just want to know her better. I didn't it is a big deal.

[nutmeg1219]

Well, as I said, just keep acting friendly. Hopefully she'll warm up to you.

[Asker]

She was warm to me... up until I asked her that question. So I should still seeher?

[nutmeg1219]

Yeah, just don't ask her that question. Not now anyway.

[nutmeg1219]

I think you should still go see her, but not every day.

[toulouse]

well are yo REALLY confused or are you just wanting confirmation because you think she likes you lol

i only ask because that is just very typical behavior of someone that feels dominated by being in crush land

i mean I've been there & I hated it, & I did t look at him unless he was talking or I was talking because I did not want to come of as a pervert lo

have you ever stared at someone while you are not talking , its a bit creepy plus, my eyes are intense , people always think I mean more than I do expression wise, however tis guy it would all be true

it was like being slightly electrocuted every time I saw him

it was painfully difficult for me to talk to him, I HATED that, & it was really helpful when he started getting the picture tat if he talked to me, it made it easier for me to talk, but also that my NOT talking was not a sign that I did not want to talk to him, & eventually he seemed to accept that...

initially he got mad because he thought I was ignoring him, then he thought I was just not interested & THEN he thought that I was playing game a & then he just thought I had nothing to say - as a defense against feeling used & or unappreciated

( I hope- well on one ever thought before & its an odd thing to say if you mean it lol)

So keep talking to her..

also, how close are you to not talking to her, I mean were you going to stop if yo did not get confirmation from people here?

how long have you known her?

[chuee]

SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES You SHE LIKES U

lol. but ya...um...did you konw? she likes you? seriously I can't stress enough. I'm exactly like this (except I don't say mean stuff, I don't say nething at all) to this guy I like nd I wish he would know DAMNIT I DO LIKE YOU, NOW BE A MAN AND COME OVER HERE!

[sammyangel9991]

Ok I just read one of your comments to an answer and now I think I know what's going on. You said that you asked her to hang out and she said no. No matter how shy a girl is, if she likes a guy and he asks her out, she's going to say yes. She's not into you and she's trying not to lead you on. She's not acknowledging you because she's not interested. She's not shy, she just doesn't like you that way. She's nice to you because she knows you like her and she cannot bring herself to be totally mean to you because you like her. She's not giving you much eye contact because she understands that eye contact is a sign of interest. If she said no to you, its not because she's shy, its because she's uninterested.

[sammyangel9991]

Oh and to answer your question, she's nervous around you because she thinks you like her

[Asker]

Wow, thanks for letting me have it with both barrels.

[sammyangel9991]

Sorry but you asked for my thoughts and I wasnt about to give you some bs answer. I think you deserve to know the truth, not the answer you want to hear.

[Asker]

Thanks. But she always initiates talking to me first. She's the one asking me questions about what I'm getting/doing.

[sammyangel9991]

She could just feel bad for not liking you back. Just because she doesn't like you that way doesn't mean she doesn't like you as a friend. I mean maybe she does like you but I don't know I don't think so.

[Asker]

She tells me personal stuff about how she doesn't like her step mother, and is thinking about moving, but likes college. She asks me why I buy the stuff I do, she really takes her time ringing the stuff up. One day she was asking if she had something on her back because the guys put stuff there. I don't know, I'm not some guy who thinks if a girl is friendly she likes me. Besides, I didn't really notice her until she started talking to me. But I do like her. I, at least, want to be her friend

[princess27]

well, some girls are just naturally nervous around the guys they dig. Personally, I'm like that too. Its nerve racking when the guy you really are into is talking to you, because you are really worried about not saying anything too weird, or acting awkward. I'd say she's too worried about making a good impression on you. Why don't you ask her out to coffee? Or better yet, give her your number and that way she has the option to call you if she's interested, and if she doesn't call then at least you don't have to go see her.

[Asker]

I am not sure if you read the comments below. I have essentially updated the question through the other comments. I asked her if she wanted to do something with me sometime and she turned away, smiled and politely said, "No". A few days later when I stopped in, she looked at me, grabbed my bleach (I was buying) and said she had a whole thing of it spill on her. Then we shared an awkward moment, "A whole thing of it, eh?"

[marley86]

You should try paying attention to how she acts around other people, and that will help you to determine what is going on. Does she talk to a lot other people, or does she simply choose who to talk to? She is probably only comfortable talking to certain people because she has a social anxiety problem. I have a problem with this too, and people say the same things about me. She probably mentions things she doesn't like, or ask question because she has problems knowing what to say in the conversations; so she mentions the first thing that comes to her head. Ask her questions about the things she seems to talk about, and that might help her to relax a little more around you.

[Asker]

Thanks for the response. I am not sure if you read the other comments but she basically is pretty quiet around others and seems to only talk to me. I've talked to her on her break and she told me stuff about her (living wise, school, what she wants, etc). She always asks me questions about what I buy, and seems to be a generally shy girl. In other comments below, I asked if she wanted to do something with me sometime, she turned away, smiled and said politely, "No".

[Living-the-ADvenTURe]

Maybe you intimidate her and she has a crush on you, therefore, she can't really relaxe properly when you speak to her. She may wish she could open up more. But everyone is different. I know that I, personally act very similar when guys I am interested in approach me. They make me feel all nervous and inferiror and I always wish they would be persistent enough so that I could eventually feel more at ease around them and show them the real me. But "Then she'll mention stuff that I have that she doesn't like or why did I pick it." Maybe she use to like you and then realised she only liked ou as a friend so is trying to hint this to you without being to harsh about it? Again, this all depends on who she is, everyone is different. Maybe explain more what you mean by this?

[Asker]

I am not sure if you read the comments below, but it tells way more than what that blip did up there. Like when I'm not there she just rings stuff up. When I get in line she changes, she gets a bit more excited. One day, she was so crazy, like yelling over to one of the girl's that worked there and asking me if something was on her back because the guys put stuff there.

One day I was getting soda and she asked why that cola, and how she doesn't like soda. Then made a big deal about me getting

[Asker]

Help to carry it. I said it was fine. When we first met, I saw she was on break by herself eating some cookies. So I went over to talk to her. She was telling me about living with her dad but moving to another state soon, and going to school, etc. I told her about me. She gave me a cookie. I asked when she works, she told me. If I ask if she's in for a late night, she always tells me the time she gets off.

[Asker]

Some times, she'll look at me and smile, I'll smile back, especially when the customers in front of me are being rowdy and rude. A few days ago, I got some chocolates, pulled them over and asked what they were, so I had to reach over and point. She said she only loves Dove chocolate. I then asked her name, she pointed to her name tag. I introduced myself and cut her off and asked if she wanted to do something sometime. She turned away and smiles and just said, "No".

[Deeplove55]

She is just very very shy. basically, she has low confidence in herself and doesn't really know how to talk to you or boys in general. Just be a little more patient with her, try to make her feel comfortable, give her a compliment which is maybe what she needs. Ask her to tell you about herself and if she refuses, then you start telling her about you. its all about making her feel relaxed around you so she can open up. Make her laugh or something and try to see if you can watcha movie with her, a comedy one to get her laughing to get rid of her nerves. ONLY if you like her that much still. Its probably not gonna be easy at first but each step counts. She will eventually be herself. Go and see her every other day not everday, buy her some flowers or a neclace, just something cute but not all the time tho.

[Asker]

I did ask if she wanted to do something and she said No. So just keep at it? Don't give up on her? I agree that she is really shy and doesn't feel comfortable.

[Deeplove55]

Yes, keep trying unless she said no like in an attitude but if shy she said that then yes keep trying cause that's what she really wants you to do but you canonly do so much. when you feel you've done all you can to get to her and nothings changed, then thro in the towel, end it. its exhausted chasing someone who doesn't know how to get out of there little shell there in. They need help mentally such as a confidence boost. So, try a bit more til you feel tired of it.

[Asker]

How do I know if she had attitude? I think she might of. I mean it wasn't a quiet No. It was like it was second nature. I thought it was really out of character.

[Deeplove55]

Then she could maybe just not really like you or too embarrased when you come around and doesn't like how she acts so she's stand offish towards you. If she keeps saying no in a way in that is annoying then I would leave a lone a lil

[Asker]

When I'm around she isn't really stand offish. Like I wrote, she looks at what I buy and she asks me about it like I bought Lindor chocolates, she asked "What are these ones?" holding it over by herself, so I have to bend over the counter and point it. She says, "Oh I don't like dark chocolate, I only like Dove. I'm hooked on Dove". By this time any customer would be going 'Where is my receipt?'

[Deeplove55]

Then she is confussing and I would just be patient with her. Like I said, help her to open up to you more.

[thumbelinasplace01]

Okay she is very nervous? The guy I have a crush on I am the same way. As soon as I see him coming my why I start shaking, I don't know why, I have told myself just to calm down and I am trying my best to get past him, so she could like you.

Very compulsive? Acting weird? What is she doing that you say she is compulsive and acting weird. She'll mention stuff that you have that she don't like or why did you pick it? Like what? She kinda keeps carrying on? What do you mean carrying on? Conversation? That could be just part of her nervousness. Give her time to get you to know you better, in time the nervousness will probably go away.

I am curious about some of the things you have told me, if you could answer some of the questions I have here I could tell you my thoughts more on this.

[Asker]

If you would read some of the comments below you, particularly the thread with BehindTheEyes. She starts acting differant. With other customers she just gives them their receipt or is annoyed they can't figure out the credit card machine. But with me she just looks at me and smiles (I look and smile back). Then she asks me random stuff like what kind of chocolates I am buying and how she only likes x, and how she doesn't like pop. I smile, I'm usually pretty swift on my way out.

[Asker]

Sometimes she just rings me up without saying too much (especially if people are around). She gets nervous like, she'll ask me if she has something on her back (why me?) or yell over to some girl, or yell something at the manager (generally being louder). Or pop a piece of chocolate in her mouth.

[thumbelinasplace01]

It sounds like she likes you...

[Asker]

When I asked if she wanted to do so something with me, why did she turn her head, laugh and say "No"? Right before that she was telling me how she loves Dove chocolates and asked about the chocolates I was getting, liking pointing stuff so I had to reach over and point it out for her.

I don't get it. Not one bit.

[thumbelinasplace01]

She's messing with you. Flirting, it sounds like she may like you but playing games with you. She's playing you. I don't mean to make that sound bad but that is what it all sounds like to me. She likes the attention she is getting from you but is not looking to date you. I mean she's flirting with you and than when you ask her out she says no. She is definitely flirting with you and she is either playing hard to get , (a game) or she is just messing with you with no intention of ever dating you

[Asker]

Does it matter that she is kind of a quiet girl? I mean why does she just ask me questions and no one else? Why can't two people do something without it being a date? When I ask another guy if he wants to do something it isn't a date.

[thumbelinasplace01]

Does she have a boyfriend? Or could she be married? Cause everything I am reading she is just messing with you.

[Asker]

I don't know, I think I saw her with some guy. No, she's moving sometime later in the year and she lives with her dad. I don't think she's messing with me. I don't think she's the kind of girl that gets a lot of attention from guys. I could be wrong. She just seems a bit intimidated. Why does she ask about stuff I buy? Like where I have to go in to detail. Like I had to carry a bunch of stuff and she made it a big deal that I get helped kept asking "sure you need help" "No" yelling above others

[thumbelinasplace01]

You had said when you asked her out she said "Yeah right" or "I can't believe you asked me that" When she said that was it like she was flattered? Your words "I asked if she wanted to do something and she kinda was taken back and was like "No" but I percieved as, "Definately no."

If you feel it was definately no, than that should be you answer. I will tell you this she is playing you. You may not want to believe that but every thing I am reading is telling me that

[Asker]

Oh no, she didn't say that. That is just how I percieved it. She just turned away, kind of smiled, kind of laughed and very awkward about it all, she was taken back. I just felt she came off in those words. She said "No" but it felt a pretty solid no. I can't really remember, but I think I asked Why not, I'm and I did say, "Are you sure?" she never responded.

[thumbelinasplace01]

When she said " I can't believe you asked me that was it like she was flattered? Did it sound that way to you? The yeah right I can only take two ways. One is yeah right like she believes you would really want to date her or like yeah right, like no way in hell will she date you. I don't know cause I wasn't there so I am asking what was her tone when she answered you?

[Asker]

Sorry, I shouldn't have put quoatations around that. She never said "I can't believe you asked me that" that was just the tone. The only thing she said verbally after I asked was, "No". But she had this look and sound like the early statement, like she was completely taken back by it. I think she seemed a little flattered. I kinda cut her off and interrupted her when I asked, I was nervous and didn't think I'd get the words out. I just asked "Would you like to do something with me sometime"

[Subotai]

If by acting weird you mean giggly and then shy she likes you. Well if you recall the playgrounds of elementary schools boys and girls made fun of each other play fought and tormented each other and beneath the surface they of course had crushes on each other. This behavior never quite goes away tease her back make fun of her a little as long as its not too harsh she will know that this is flirting and not just friendship. Girls are weird like that. Partly its because attractive girls are used to guys just giving compliments and that gets boring. Then ask her out don't wait too long. If she says no its not a big deal even if it feels like it is. She sent you signals so she should expect that and there are plenty of other girls out there good luck.

[falconfallon]

Break it up a little bit if she really likes you back she'll miss you and really be looking forward to you coming back. The only reason she can't look at you sometimes or she says she doesn't like things is because she's nervous she really want to just make you pleased with her but you should defiantly break it up a little bit like over two or three days, make her worry make her miss you just to make her realize she actually likes you. Yet, you could always ask her to go to the movies with you just a casual thing, and KEEP SMILING not like a creepy joker but just to calm her down and make her feel comfortable around you. If she says no so what don't act like anything changed around you two or else she'll change.

[jess7]

i think she is nervous...like when I am nervous I don't know what to say and I might say somethings sponteniously lol... she might feel intimidated and that is y she does not look you in the eye I do that sometimes I look away and I might be like ooohheemmmggeee lol and just get embarassed lol... maybe she is like picking on You because that is how she is... like she might mean it to be playfull... and you mentioned that you asked her if she wanted to go out and she said no well if she has strict parents like me... they might not want her to date... or go out... my parents have a hard time with that still so she might not be sure wether to go or not... I think is nice of you to go visit her at her job I think you should go once in a while not everyday... so she can get the hint that you like her... maybe you should ask her for her number that would also be a great hint for her... I have a question how old is she? and I hope I have helped..

[Naash]

It clearly means she likes you. She knows the moment she starts talking to you she'll blush and you'll know all. Now do you get why she is avoiding you. Avoiding eye contact is one big giveaway.

Why don't you start ignoring her for a while. And see how she reacts. Talk to other girls in her presence. If she has even the smallest of thing for you. it'll come out clear.

If you want her, then make her want you.

Good luck ! :)

[Asker]

Did you read the other comments below?

[psyche]

She likes you but seems to have low self-esteem. In all actuality, do you want to be with someone like that. Don't get to know her out of pity, because you may get involved, see that she's toxic and then she will get very hurt.

Tell her straight up that you want to get to know her better and spend time with her. If she says no again. Forget her.

[Asker]

I think she has a boyfriend and is just flirty. I haven't been going quite so much so its been a while. I thought by asking her to do something it pretty much means I want to know her and spend time with her.

[EmoBarbie]

Hm...I think it up deeto you. .I mean do you have p feeling for this girl are you just a friends? Did you every asks "what the deal do you like me are not?" are have you just been thinking about it? I mean if I was in your shoes I would just come out and asks and if she says arounothing/beats nd it.I would move on cause there are a lot of girls out there.I mean still in the end it up to you.Just take what people may say but also give it long thinking cause it your life. Well hope that helps (:

[EmoBarbie]

Sorry meant to say "it up to you .." just take out that "dee" part ^_^;;

[Asker]

Yeah I know, a lot of fish in the sea and so forth. I like this girl but I'm kinda starting to pack up the bags and hitting the trail. She just seems kinda flirty. I don't know, she just seemed a little sad to me, I guess that kinda drew me to her a bit. I asked her if she wanted to do soemthing with me and she said no.

[EmoBarbie]

Well look like she didn't beat around it.But I know girls like that and they just like guys chasing them. Well if that what she wanted?

[Asker]

I don't know but I don't like mind games, at all. I got enough of that growing up with my mom.

I just wanted to know her a little bit, even as a friend, was all.

[EmoBarbie]

Yeah mind games never been my fav too.

Some girls are just funny acting like that hope the next one is better for you. (:

[angelbaby320]

It sounds like she likes you too. Does she know you like her? If she doesn't maybe you could try asking her out that way she gets the hint that you like her and you'll be able to go somewhere and chat that might make her more comfortable. If she's really nervous around you, you might try a double date or a group thing if she knows your friends that way its not so awkward for her.

[Asker]

I don't know if you read the other comments. But I basically updated stuff in the comments below about how she asks me stuff and what not. I asked if she wanted to do something with me sometime (I kinda suprised her with that) and she said, "No".

[angelbaby320]

My bad I don't read the other comments because I don't like them to influence what my opinion is. That sucks...I'm sorry to hear that. You should probably find out for sure if she has a boyfriend....if she does you should back off. If not maybe she's just scared to go out with you or maybe she wants to know your willing to chase after her. Good Luck!

[Miss_Desirae]

Well, I am thinking that she may like you, but is trying to hide it and make it seem not so obvious, or that maybe she is afraid around guys. It's possible that she does not know how to interact with them. Have you seen her react the same way around other guys, or does she act normal around them? I know for me, I'm the second one, and so I get flustered around pretty much any guy.

[Asker]

She treats me differently. Other guys she is really cold to them. Most people she seems annoyed. But with me she warms up. Sometimes we smile at each other. She normally has her hair up, always wears a black sweater/pants and wears little make up, kinda unsure of herself. I actually didn't notice her much until she started asking me questions. Like she asks what I'm buying. Read some of the comments below. Anyways, she had her hair down and looked really pretty, I asked her out, said no. So?

[Miss_Desirae]

Alright. She may like you, then. As for her turning you down when you asked her out, it could be that she wants to take things slowly. Maybe she wants to talk to you as a friend first before getting involved with anything. She may want to take time to get to know you better before anything else. Keep talking to her, and see how things go. If it's meant to be, then maybe something will spark between the both of you.

[Asker]

Well I asked if she wanted to do something with me and she said no. That didn't sound like something she liked if I was a friend. I just would like to get to know her out side of the store. Otherwise I have to go in just to see her. Even if I don't have anything to buy, you think its allright if I just go up to her counter and say, "I don't have anything to buy but I thought I'd see how you're doing?"

[Miss_Desirae]

Well, based off of what you said, she seems to at least like you more than the other guys, so I think you stand more of a chance than anyone else to get closer to her. I don't see why you shouldn't just go up to her and say that. ^-^ I just thought of something! Are you by chance a really good looking guy? Because maybe she is intimidated by you. Maybe she thinks she doesn't stand a chance or thinks that she wouldn't be good enough for you. I know you asked her out, but it still is possible.

[Asker]

I don't think I'm really good looking but I'm pretty decent looking. I think I got pretty good blue eyes. I dress pretty nicely (dress clothes) and pretty muscular build. I mean, when I asked her, she looked away and kinda laughed like, "yeah right" or "I can't believe YOU asked me that". I kinda think she's intimidated, I mean she asks me what the yellow stuff was in a Boston Cream Cake. Or why I'd buy Pepsi (instead of Coke).

[Miss_Desirae]

Well, it sounds like you do a great job keeping yourself up, and that is probably why she is intimidated. You did say that she normally dresses in black sweater/pants, and so maybe deep inside, she is comparing the way she dresses to the way you do, and tries to make small talk to hide her discomfort. Maybe she secretly isn't comfortable with herself. I can identify with that, myself.

[Asker]

Well, she always wears a black sweater and pants, I don't know if she has to for her position or what (summer, 70/80s outside). Everyone else has some khaki colored shirt on for the store. But if she wanted to do something with me wouldn't she have just said yes? Yeah I feel she's not comfortable with herself. That's one thing I like about her, maybe I can get her to feel comfortable with herself. She let her hair down and she looked really pretty. I don't get why she just wouldn't be like yeah.

[Asker]

Not too sound cocky or anything but it was completely not what I was expecting she would say. I thought it would be at least a "Yeah sure". Or "Okay" not a "No".

In any case, since you can relate, should I keep going after her? It is no worry on my end, I just don't want her to feel uncomfortable...

[Miss_Desirae]

Maybe she didn't say yes because she probably thought there was no possible way that someone like you would be even remotely interested in her, like maybe she felt that in some way, you weren't being sincere or something. I mean, I've had something like that happen to me before. Sometimes, guys would say their friends like me, but it isn't true. Maybe something like that happened with her in the past. Things like that could cause trust issues.

[Miss_Desirae]

I think it would be good if you kept talking to her, because that just might show her that you are truly interested in getting to know her better.

[Asker]

Could it be that she has a boyfriend? Honestly, the stuff I buy there I really don't need to. Sometimes I just drop by to buy something needless so I can talk to her a little bit. Should I just proceed like everything is normal and nothing ever happened (so to speak)? I was pretty nervous asking her, I cut her off and interrupted her because I didn't think I'd get the words out. Should I dress down (sometimes I come in shorts t-shirt)?

[Miss_Desirae]

I don't know about her having a boyfriend. I would think that she would have told you that she had one right after you asked her out if she did. But yes, continue to talk to her normally, and try not to bring that situation up as much as possible unless she does. You can try dressing down and see if she becomes a bit more comfortable around you. Pay close attention to how she reacts. I suggest trying anything you can think of that might make her comfortable.

[Asker]

Okay, so I often do you think I should see her? I normally go pretty often. And I definately should NOT ignore her? (which is what I was thinking of doing)...

[Miss_Desirae]

Well, I think it would be good to give her a little space, but yes, definitely don't ignore her. That might cause unwanted tension and maybe even conflict. Maybe try limiting seeing her to a couple of times to a few times a week. She may start to think about you more often, and wonder where you are at.

[Asker]

The whole thing is that I am only here for the summer until like September. She told me she is moving too... but when I said "That's too bad..." she was very quick to say, "well it might not be until later"... so I feel this rush because I may not have a lot of time with her...

[Miss_Desirae]

Oh, wow. That could be another reason why she said no. I see why this is such a difficult predicament for you, now. I see why you are so pressured, but all I can say is try not to think about it too much. You guys still have plenty of time. Just try to be friends. If things go well, maybe you both will keep in touch with each other.

[Asker]

That's fine! Friends is GREAT! All I was trying to do was talk to her outside of the dang store. That's it. Where I have longer than 2 minutes.

[Miss_Desirae]

Haha! I see. ^-^ Well then, that's good. Just try telling her exactly that, then. Tell her you would like to be friends with her. She might feel better knowing that.

[Asker]

So should I bring it up? Or should I just keep casual about the whole situation? Sometimes she works really late, like I asked if she had to burn the midnight oil again (she said what time exactly she gets off). I'd like to ask if I could give her a ride home or walk her home... but at this point it might be too much...

[Miss_Desirae]

Yes, bring up that you would like to be friends with her, just don't bring up asking her out. You might not want to bring up walking her home or giving her a ride right away, because she might take it as something more or might feel a bit awkward. Wait until she is completely comfortable with you. Try asking if you can talk to her after work.

[Asker]

Okay. We've known each other a little longer than a month. Should I still ask if she wants to talk? I mean she works until midnight.

[Miss_Desirae]

Yes. I don't think it would hurt, unless she is extremely tired or something after work.

[Asker]

Thanks, I just feel like I burned this situation with her. A nice thing going and I had to be silly.

[Miss_Desirae]

No problem. ^-^ Try to think positively. I don't think all is lost, so don't be so hard on yourself. I don't think you did anything wrong. Who knows, she might be a bit flattered.

[Asker]

Yeah, I'll try. I guess I'm trying to block it out, when I think back, I kinda feel like she was appalled by me asking. But I think I can still win her heart anyways! :)

[BehindTheEyes]

is she like that with other people too? cause it might be her personality. but if she isn't like that with ohter guys she probably likes you.. a lot. I'm really nerous around my crush and can't look him in the eyes for too long cause it drives me insane. however the comments on your stuff is harder to explain. maybe she's just saying things without thinking about it to keep the conversation going.

[Asker]

No, she gets really weird when I am around her. She seems pretty quiet then when I get around she's like nervous. Or acts really excited, almost like she's out of breathe. She's like yelling over to her friend like she's busy and not paying attention to me. Its weird because we've talked and I thought she really liked me. She told me about moving, school, work and so forth. We even look into each other's eyes and smile. I just got a crap haircut and now she seems busy when I'm around, but smiles

[decode]

She really likes you!!!!!!!! She's basically trying to make herself look popular and like she has a life so your interest grows in her.

A lot of girls act this way...I have before :P

[Asker]

Aw. So should I just talk to her like normal and then ask for her number?

[NAU-Bound]

Yeah, the yelling to the friend makes her look popular and that she's making time out of her "busy life" to make time for you. You should feel special, because I'm pretty sure she likes you.

[Asker]

I saw her tonight but it was very quiet. She looked me in the eye, rang up my stuff and that was it. I smiled at her but she just handed me my stuff and that's it. Do you think she lost interest? Or I smelled bad?

[BehindTheEyes]

Haha I really don't knwo if you smell bad but I doubt that's it. I don't know, if I like a guy it's for a veryyyy long time but others move on fast. If she's shy she won't make it obvious that she likes you. Give her sign that you like her and maybe she'll open up. She might just be playing it cool.

[Asker]

I think she plays it cool. Whenever I see her she tries to play it off. But then she gets her anxious moments. I'm used to being around girls that rub themselves up against you... but I really like "our" moments together (her and I). We both look at each other and smile. I think I have. I mean I've gone up to her counter, said I got nothing to buy and just chatted with her. Her line is always busy. I just need to get her number. Or give her mine? Ask when she's not working and if she wants to do

[BehindTheEyes]

Yeah you should ask her number. She'll love it if you take initiative if she likes you. If she doens't want to give her number.. well then you know she's not into you. So she works in a store? A friend of mine got a note from a guy while she was working, saying she's really pretty + his phonenumber. She was still with another guy but dumped him after a while and they've been togetter for over 2 years now. Just saying there's hope :)

[Asker]

The big thing is I go to that store a lot (almost every day she works). Is that too much? I think its better if I just ask her for her number.

[BehindTheEyes]

Well if it is to get food then no it's not too much. If it's like a clothingstore then yea it might look a bit obessive lol.

In this case you better ask her number yes. Even if she doesn't give you her number because she has a boyfriend or some other reason, she'll still be flattered.

[Asker]

Its a grocery store.

[Asker]

So I asked her today. I went in and bought some chocolates. She went through everyone ahead of her quicly. Then rang up my item and looked and asked this one thing was. I said I wasn't sure. She said she only likes Dove. She loves Dove and not dark chocolate. I was somewhat nervous, rushed and kinda interrupted her and said I didn't know her name, introduced myself. She pointed to her name tag and said its hard to pronounce. I smiled and felt embarressed. But oh well. She shook hands.

[Asker]

Then I asked if she wanted to do something with me. She looked away and had that "whoa" look on her face shook her head and said "No". I kinda put her on the spot and asked if she was sure, she kind didn't respond just said No. So I said allright, smiled and left.

[babylovee-xo]

Yeah she definately likes you, I act louder around guys I like and try to seem cooler, and I always try to smile and get his attention

[babylovee-xo]

Hmmmm, I think she felt nervous cause she was put on the spot.

keep showing interest and maybe she'll catch on

[AmyHelen]

She either doesn't like you or does but is just a bit intimidated by you. Try to be her friend first and have a relaxed conversation, once she seems happier around you- this might take some time, then flirt with her. If she still isn't interested even as a friend, you should leave her alone.

[Asker]

I kinda thought she was because she told me when she's off work and what not. But its like with each passing day she gets weirder. We'd look into each other's eyes and smile, and I was like 'Yeah definately'. But now she doesn't do that but makes more comments. When I'm around her attitude changes, she's yelling over to her friend, or doing something extra-ordinary. We've chatted before fine, she told me some personal stuff but she just seems to get more nervous around me each day.

[AmyHelen]

Have you asked like maybe say something along the lines of I really haven't seen you as much. She might be playing hard to get, If you think she is, try flirting with her a little then backing off, flirting a little then backing off... Try to get her to work for your attention as well.

[Asker]

She has been working for my attention a bit. When I'm up tto see her she'll chat with her friend about this and that and act really busy. She looks really excited to see me.

[AmyHelen]

Well, good luck.

[Asker]

Thanks, I asked her today. She was looking over some chocolates I was buying and said she only likes Dove and was asking some questions. I asked her name and said mine (even though she had a name tag). I was pretty rushed and interrupted her with what I was saying. I asked if she wanted to do something sometime, she looked away and just kept saying "No", kinda smiling or taken back or I don't know. That "whoa" look. I said Come on, then finally smiled and said allright and left.

[emiliagraziella]

I agree, It's DEFINITELY because she likes you. She's just being shy. I'm really shy too and when I really like a guy I also get all stiff and am not myself, I tell myself that I'm just playing "hard to get" but I really just end up coming accross as being cold and unapproachable. It sucks and it's not easy to break through it, but just keep trying to be as easy going as possible. If you like her as much as you say you do, don't be afraid to let her know how you feel either. Sometimes all it really takes is for a guy to act like a man and show a girl that he cares about her without worrying about what other people think about him. Even if it means acting like a bit of a dork or just showing her, even more, that you are a real person and approachable. It definitely would work for me, there have been tons of guys who have liked me, but didn't do anything about it. I may be old fashioned, but It's not attractive when the guy has to be chased after.

[lovecraze]

GOd, that's just like me, but when I talk I don't say mean stuff, but I have trouble meeting his eye whiling talking too.. well if she is like me, I would say she is way into you...> AND is also very selfconscious... she might think that you don't like her.. ok?

[neverwillchange]

deff. overall she seems to be a hard read. I say with people like that you need to be straight forward. You might think that you are putttig her under pressure , but trust me if she can break away from being shy and tell you what is wrong then maybe she will open up a little more. I can tell by you saying that she talks more around u, that she is into u. But communication is key. You need to be asking her , "hey is it kewl if I come see you today." Some girls might get annoyed by tht constant trying to see her thing all the time. You should still go and see her and talk to her .. she seems a lot like me lol. and the fact that she is very open with things and to me when I do tht its because I want that person to get to know me and I want to feel like I have a bond with tht person. ( If that makes sense =) ) ... Time is deff. a virtue. so take it slow. I hope that I was a help.. if you need more help message me. good luck=)

[bbgirl]

i think that she it could be self confidence issues, or it might be that she may not be interested so she's coming off as distant and shy. like when I know a guy likes me but I don't like them(and don't wanna be rude) I noticed that I come off shy and weird. its either that or she likes you, has low self confidence and maybe has had guy trouble in her past...

[elisabethk30]

you should do whatever feels right. however, if you really, really like her then continue to see her everyday and work on becoming friends. chances are she will slowly become less nervouse around you as she gets to know you better and feels secure. let her know that ur there for her and taht she can trust you.

[Moose2coolvargas]

I have an similar issue, this girl only talks to the other people in my group, when I say anything she doesn't look my direction, but she is listening because she will say something about what I just said. This girl used to talk to me like the rest until I told her I liked her. Then her behavior did a 180. Blocked me on fb for awhile then unblock then block again... strange, I can't figure it out

[emzy-89]

it sounds to me that she really likes you. I used to be the same around guys that I liked. I over analysed everything that I did, this was probably the opposite to what I should have done because I usually just ended up making a huge idiot of myself. lol. just try and make her feel as comfortable as possible around you. seeing her often may help with this because you become more familiar to her and she'll see you as a normal everyday part of her life.

[Anonymous]

Whoa you cut her off by saying that, you two just met and you ask her out at that spot. That's too fast! Of course she will say no. Well, just take it slow then. If you two meet again never mention about hanging out with you anymore. Just wait a while like 2-3 weeks from now. Don't be overly friendly, you'll make her loose interest in you. Just be casual. Do you know is she's single?

[Asker]

No, we knew each other for longer than a month. We've talked privately. She told she stuff about her family, and I told what I'm doing. She's moving because she doesn't like it here and I'm only living out here until September. But we still chat anyways. She'll look at me and smile and I do the same back. She asks what I'm buying.

I just felt I should ask her if she wanted to do something. I didn't at all expect her to say no.

[Opinion Owner]

There can be a lot of possibilities of why she behaves that way:

1) She doesn't wanna admit she likes you althou she might feel that way (she doubt herself for liking you)

2) She just have a little crush on you so it's not enough to bring to the next level so just staying friends will be best option

3) She does like you but she thought she's moving and you're moving, how you two gonna meet if something does happen between u2

4) She's a flirty person

Thee best thing is to ask her directly y

[Opinion Owner]

Ask her directly why she doesn't wanna hang out with you... So when she said no, just ask like oh why not? I thought we're friends. If she says she's busy and all that and never can make the time for you, move on. It means she doesn't have interest in you. No matter how busy someone is, they should have free time for their friends like even only an hour in a month or two or a year, whatever the point is they can make the time if they thought you're important. It's not like you 2 live far rite?

[Asker]

I honestly thought she really liked it. She told me personal things about her life and her aspirations. Whatever, maybe she is just really flirty. All I did was ask, Would you like to do something with me and I got a flat out, No. I think I asked Why not and she just said no. All shed say is No. I don't think she's a flirty person, I don't know, maybe she is, she never appears to be very happy at work. We are within a few miles of each other. I'm not sure if she's single. But I think so, she works late hours. Hell, she tells me what time she gets off.

[Anonymous]

i think if you stop trying to talk with her for sometimes and see what will be her reflex action !...

but from what you are saying she doesn't try to make any moves or initiate a move by any means, she even doesn't show interest ...so you'd better move on or come straight to the point and tell her you like her and see what will be her response

[Asker]

I kinda let her go for a little bit. Just not to let her see me too much. Its like she is even more intimidated by me but its kinda like she gives me extra attention without looking at me. Now, she doesn't really look at me like she used to but she makes extra comments to keep the conversation going. But we're always around people I can't seem to just get her by herself.

[Opinion Owner]

This is confusing !!.....

you have to make a move, so you'd either keep things going in the next step or you just stop trying to get the girl if she is not ready to be committed in a relationship with you !!

[Asker]

Thanks. I asked her today if she wanted to do something. She was taken back and said "no".

[Opinion Owner]

Then you just move on and never regret because she doesn't appreciate your love so she didn't deserve it ...

[Asker]

Could it be she's just nervous? Or playing hard to get? I really don't get it. After customers went through she was asking me questions about this and saying how she loves Dove chocolate.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah it maybe true she is nervous but not trying to play hard to get this might be out of nervousness so she is ruining her chances and then like "ooooh, what is that hell I had done" and so she returned back to talk frankly to get things back right ....

[Asker]

No, all this talk was before I asked her. She was taking what I was buying and asking me questions about it (it was some fancy chocolates). She said she just prefers Doves. She loves them. Then I sprung that question on her. She just turned away like "Uhhh" and said "No". Didn't matter what I said afterwards. I was NOT expecting that answer. Then again I wasn't the smoothest so oh well. I asked if she was sure and she kind just shyed away. So I smiled and said allright and left.

[Opinion Owner]

Okaaay, I got it

then from my own point of view she has no interest in this relationship ......you have to move on and search for someone who cares for you

[Asker]

Okay, thanks. Why does she act kinda flirty and give me a bit more attention than others? Should I just avoid her from now on?

[Opinion Owner]

Being flirty might be part of her personality and she is just trying to hide something that was rude towards you and things like that .....

and yeah start from now on to ignore her and so on and if you make any different with her be sure she will contact you to see what has happened and what is going on with you and why did you change, if she didn't do so then leave her and find someone who deserves you

[Asker]

So I can't win her over?

[windyone]

In mu opinion she likes you and doesn't know what you say or how to act so she just talks about whatever. Poor thing she is probably trying to make herself more appealing by talking to you about things but doesn't realize what she is doing .

[Asker]

Did you reads ome of the comments below? I asked if she wanted to do something sometime and she said, "no".

[windyone]

Oh I sure didn't read that. Then maybe she is just a high energy type of girl who likes to talk. Need more detail

[sassygal4]

Sounds like she likes you but doesn't know what to do or how to approach it. She may be very shy or maybe you're not letting her know that you like her in return, so she's trying not to make it seem like she likes you.

[Asker]

Well I asked her out, how much more obvious do I need to make it?

[sassygal4]

Well maybe she doesn't like you. I can only guess what her deal is. What did she say when you asked her out?

[Asker]

We were talking about the chocolates I was buying. She grabbed and asked what they were, I had to reach over and point what it was (she kinda does that with stuff I buy). But we never met formally so I introduced myself and said I didn't know her name (written on her name tag). I was nervous and kinda cut her off and asked if she wanted to do something with me. She immediately tuned away, kinda smiling/laughing and said "No". Definately didn't think she was saying flat no. I smiled said allright

[Naash]

Even I do the same when I like a guy, trying hard to be a different me. She being nervous in front of you means you mean more to her. Try giving your attention to some other girl you'll get all the answers.

I can bet she thinks about you all day.

[aurasprw]

It sounds like she likes you. Otherwise why would she be nervous?

However, it REALLY sounds like she's projecting this image of a "perfect guy" onto you and then gets mad when you don't fit into that mold. I would probably stay away.

[bachrocks18]

Maybe she is nervous? I mean we are only human and maybe compulsion and criticism is her way of calming her nerves. I think that she may be a little insecure and that she may need you to tell her you like her a million times so that she can relax around her. If you like her you'll help her realize her worth. She is probably thinking why does he like me. You just can't quit on her because she is nervous.

[Asker]

I don't think you read the comments below, I've been updating this post the last couple of days. I asked if she wanted to do something with me the other day and she said, "No".

[bachrocks18]

Oh, well then maybe she likes flirting with you or rather practicing on you. Maybe you give her the time and attention she wants and then when you initiate something more she gets nervous and starts talking herself against you. Maybe she likes to flirt with you doesn't actually like you. It sounds mean but maybe she wouldn't deserve you anyway. There are plenty of other fish in the sea that you can't not ask out.

[Asker]

Yeah. I just liked her though. Oh well for me. I'm such a silly boy.

[bachrocks18]

You aren't silly, you liked her. That is okay. Maybe she is silly for not liking you back. But then again it is her prerogative not to. But it was irresponsible of her to lead you on.

[Asker]

I was almost certain. I mean, she told me all this personal stuff about her, like moving, school.. I've known her about a month, said when she works. She always acts squirrelly around me. One of those "nice girls", kinda uncomfortable with herself. She's always asking about what I'm buying and why I buy it but with other customers she can't stand them. Sometimes she'll look me right in the eye and smile, I'd look back and smile. I didn't even notice her until she started asking me stuff

[bachrocks18]

Like I said you might have a really agreeable disposition. You make her feel confident until things get serious and she realizes she can't handle that type of dialogue. Like she doesn't think about her actions before she acts. It isn't you it is her.

[Asker]

That's too bad, she isn't the kind of girl I go for but I really wanted to know her. Hope all those things she wanted works out. Maybe I thought she just needed a little boost in her confidence :)

So, do I just ignore her from now on? Like you wrote, "You just can't quit on her because she is nervous"

[bachrocks18]

Continue to be the nice person you seem like. Try to develop a friendship with her so that you can help her with her self-esteem. You can continue to get to know her and she can perhaps grow to like you in the way that you possibly like her. If she doesn't and she sees you as a friend that is okay too. The key is not to be too pushy when it comes to dating her.

[Asker]

Well, I'm only living in this state until September (possibly December). She said she's moving in the fall, when I said that's too bad she corrected to say, well maybe winter. So I just feel rushed to get to know even a little bit about her as soon as possible. It would be just really great to talk to her outside of the store, something longer than 15 seconds to 2 minutes. So I had to ask if she wanted to do something (I thought a coffee shop would be nice).

[Asker]

I don't have much to buy (now that I think of it, I don't have much reason to go in there). Should I make obvious? Like go up to her counter and say, "I don't have anything to buy but I thought I'd see how you are?" (I've done this before and she's blushed).

[bachrocks18]

You can say "Hey I was in the neighborhood and wanted to say hey" and then that will start the conversation leading you to say "A friend of mine told me about this really good coffee place and I have been meaning to go, If you aren't doing anything later would you like to come?" then when you notice her getting tense about being asked out you say "As friends of course, I just hate getting coffee by myself" or something silly like that. If you keep what you are say as unromantic as...

[babylovee-xo]

Im thinking she really likes you.

Not all girls are super flirty and easygoing around guys.

Some are more shy and nervous. I say keep trying to get to know her..she'll apreciate it.

[Asker]

I asked her out the other day and she said no. So, no means no right?

[Asker]

Click the 'Show All' button on your last comment. A bit more.

[babylovee-xo]

It could, or it could mean she's still nervous or not looking for a relationship.

it might not mean she doesn't like you.

[Asker]

Well, what do I do about it? Do I still go to see her? I just wanted to be friends and see if we can do something, or at least know her outside of the store.

[babylovee-xo]

Keep showing interest, without looking needy or obbsessed

[Asker]

Well, I really don't have a lot to buy. Think it would be okay if I went up to her counter, just say "I don't have anything to buy, but I thought I'd see how you're doing?"

I've done that once. She told me about how she was up late reading a good book.

[babylovee-xo]

Thats good, cause she's not pushing you, and that's actually a very good thing to say, it lets her know that your considerate and caring.

[Asker]

Well, she knows how I feel now. So I don't want to come off as stalking.

[Lauzbabe]

I think she's just proper into you.

Try getting her number and texting her, or talking to her on facebook or whatever, she'll find it easier to talk to you and become more comfortable around you. Also try getting her when you're both on your own, she won't be so worried about what other people will think of her then

[Asker]

Thanks. I asked her today. She commented on some chocolates and how she likes Dove. I asked if she wanted to do something and she kinda was taken back and was like "No" but I percieved as, "Definately no." I don't know?

[miki94]

That's how I act... Yes, I know it sucks and in the name of all girls who do this, I'm sorry! ^^'

Of course, that's how I act when I have a crush on someone...

[xurupitalove]

I bet she has a big crush on you... but the thing is that she seems to be TERRIBLY SHY, which makes she act so weird around you. She likes you, but she is afraid that she will act stupid or sound stupid, so she ends up looking weird, cause she is too afraid of what you will think of her that she tries hard to don't do anything "stupid".

She SURE likes you!

[xcrunner16]

Haha! I bet she is just nervous. Don't compelety give up on her yet. :P

Maybe if you say something stupid or just be kinda' like loose then she will feel more like she can loosen up. :)

[Cassy]

well its probably because she likes you and doesn't know how to react because she does like you.. or maybe she's just weird lol. maybe if she is acting weird maybe don't talk to her for a day or so and then see if she comes and talk's to you.. if she likes you she will come talk to you because she would be wondering why your not talking to her and then by her approching you she may not be so nervous cause she would already know what she is going to say.. just a segestion :) good luck bud

[soccerlvr11]

that girl sounds a lot like me...im really shy. to make her really want yo maybe try not really talk to her for a day then she will be thinking about you. It may not seem like she doesn't really like you but she probobly does. I'm the same way. I just don't know what to say to a guy. whatever you do font be a jerk. you may think its just flirting but its really a big turnoff.

ANSWER MINE PLEASE!

[RavEr]

there is a lot of reasons.

shy girls are shy for a reason..

maybe somiething happened in her past that is keeping here in that shell

theres a good post on shy girls on this blog

here you go

link

i hope it helps

[Katiekay325]

I think she likes you.. how long have you been stopping in an seeing her? have you ever asked her out?

[Asker]

You should read the comments below. I have written way more about this girl than in the question. I've been going in for a while but never really noticed her until the last few months when she was asking me questions and stuff about what I buy. The several months we've been kinda "connecting" so to speak.

I asked her if she wanted to do something sometime and she turned away and said, "No".

[Katiekay325]

I read some of them.. but I do have to say I agree with Naash. I wonder how it would be if you did't stop and see her for 3days or did't talk to her for 3days make her want you..

[Asker]

Well, lately I have been going in a lot less. The last time she was nervy about going on her break, I asked how she was and she gets that way. I just waiting so I can go on break! As she said. After she took of me, she took her time and turned around to ask the guy who relieved her if he wanted anything (I'm directly in her line of sight). Kinda weird for a guy that has to work while she gets to take a break.

[Asker]

I have to go in tonight though, so I wonder if I should check out iwth her or someone else.

[Katiekay325]

Someone else try it

[EmoBarbie]

Hm..She could like you and not know how to show feeling/act.She sounds alittle mixed up to me.You should just asks her "What the deal".and if things keep going the same move on. hope that helps

[forever]

I think you should just end the confusion between you and her. If you want to talk more about it, just add me as your friend here. I'd love to give you more advice on it.

[xxwhisperzxx]

idiot, she's into you

yes go talk to her!

gosh! why are men so blind!

well, I guess to you we are too...

id really like some fullproof way to know if a guy likes you,...do you know any?

[Brando]

I think that's what he's asking though, is how can he break the ice with this girl if she keeps it frozen?

[Jonny505]

Some of us aren't as blind as you'd like to think. Many of us guys have a zero tolerance policy for disrespect. She might think he's an idiot for not making a move when in-fact she simply doesn't realize that she blew the whole thing ages ago and he's moved-on. He might screw-up and decide to sleep with her, but not without the cognitive dissonance. There are plenty of women out there who know how to love and respect men so we don't feel the need to settle for just anyone.

[Jonny505]

BTW I'm not referring to the Op.

[Katiekay325]

you asked her out to soon. but I sounds like she's into you

[Asker]

I just asked if she wanted to do something. so what do I do? keep seeing her and be interested? or go to another check out stand for a few times?

[Katiekay325]

Keep tryin to be around her and all

[Katiekay325]

Not all the time don't get creepy but don't give up

[im_erika]

its a defense mechanism

she's just plain out nervous

you should confront her about it and see what happens

youll be suprised

[Asker]

Actually, I asked her if she wanted to do something with me and she said No.

[Anonymous]

there are really basically 2 possibilities. she is either REALLY into you too, and is just super nervous, or she isn't into you and is trying to send you a message. I'd try and flirt with her and make her laugh. You should casually be like "me you and some friends should go see a movie sometime" and see how she responds. if she says no, she is most likely not into you.

[Anonymous]

It depends, I mean maybe the girl is just shy. Because I remember when this guy liked me and I liked him, he became more confidnet than me, and I was really shy, so until he asked me out I was like, okay I'm not as shy as I was before. So SHE MIGHT HAVE A CRUSH YOU !

[Anonymous]

She doesn't like you, she is not interested in you, stop harassing her, leave her alone and get your own life. If someone ignores you, it DOES NOT mean they like you!

[obligations]

maybe she likes you LOL...

Im like that around the guy I like.

[babybear13]

It is because she likes you and is afraid for you to know I been through that onces but it was a long time ago all you have to do is be patient she will get out of her shell and she does not want to know she looks at you other times

[CrazyChiCkx3]

She Likes You But Doesn't Find The Way To Express It

She Gets Nervous Being So Close To You And She

Doesnt Know What She's Saying

[sexi-britt]

i think she's shy..just keep talkin to her then just be friendly back and see where it goes from there..

[chiquita506]

give her some space and maybe she really likes you 2. and yes you should see her every other day

[cocteaugirl75]

She has a huge, huge, huge crush on YOU.

[CrazynKinky]

It sounds like she really likes you

[Ainani]

Thats becasue you're gay