When you are overweight, often times there are people who make fun of you because of your weight or won't give you the time of day because of it. However, once the weight starts dropping off, some of these same people who couldn't even be bothered to greet you in the morning, may now want to be your friend, now want to chat you up, now want to hang out with you. Listen, it can be exciting to have all this possible new attention on you, especially when it comes to your looks, something you may not have experienced in a while, or ever, but even though physically you might have changed dramatically, you are STILL the same person you were all those pounds ago. Just because you may be given new attention, doesn't mean you have to just accept it because it's there. Don't surround yourself in your new body with people who will clearly only be there for you when you're 'at the top,' but will clearly ignore or abandon you when you are at your weakest. You have to value yourself now, and keep those around you that don't just value your outsides, but your insides too.
2. Meet the Food Police (also the exercise police)
Some very good intentioned friends, family, or co-workers, once they learn you have lost weight, are losing weight, or at the end of your weight loss journey will decide that they are going to be your own personal food and exercise police. When you go for a small box of chips instead of carrots one fateful evening, they will make absolutely sure you know about it. They will remind you how fat you used to be. They will wonder why on earth you of all people are eating that. They may not understand you have a cheat meal worked into your eating plan, or they may just be jerks. The same people may go to the gym and wonder out loud why you aren't working out hard enough given your former fat self status, or your current one. Yes, every once in a while you need a kick in the pants in the right direction or to help you help yourself avoid falling back into old habits, and just know that those occasional people and comments are not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the people who constantly on a loop, monitor you and what you're doing and eating. Unless you are a child, you are responsible for yourself ultimately and what you are doing to get healthy and no one is allowed to nominate themselves as your keeper because they cannot lose the weight for you. Let these people know in as tactful a manner as possible that you've got this or are learning how to get it, and then ask them to not continue making comments and remarks.
3. You'll become your own personal fitness and nutrition expert
Every magazine, internet blurb, and book would almost have you believe that all you ever have to do to continously lose weight is eat some greens and go work out an hour a day. This works amazingly well for a while...and then, as your body will begin to adjust and bring itself back to a level where it is able to easily handle your new activity load and calories in, you will find yourself scratching your head, getting extremely frustrated, and maybe even relapsing on your diet/exercise in anger as to why the scale isn't moving an inch. This is where you will have to buckle down and seek the advice of fitness-y friends, hit up the internet for tips on how to escape being on the dreaded plauteau, and how to workout again so you can see results. Oh and did I mention, what works for you probably (read: definitely) won't work for someone else? Yes, there goes that sneaky evolution thing again. Our bodies are made to adjust to the stresses we put on it and to fight against starvation. Your body doesn't know it isn't starving or isn't in danger when you're out there exercising and cutting your calories back to a lower level. It wants to get back to homeostatis, where everything is working hand in hand with one another. You have to do your research and find out how to get around these evolutionary hiccups to your health and wellness plans. You may have to figure these things out multiple times before the end of your journey.
4. Some Damage May Be Permanent
There are a million and one reasons which far outweight your vanity, why you should want to lose weight to become active and healthy, but sometimes there are some side affects to weight loss or putting off weight loss for so long that may be permanent for you. Stretch marks, loose skin, damage to your knees and hips, issues with gallstones, heart disease, diabetes and it's complications, and even depression for those that think weight loss is going to solve all their problems. It's important to keep tabs on your health with a medical professional and to address any psychological issues you may have dealing with your weight loss. Remind yourself that the cosmetic issues are nothing as compared to the dangerous and unhealthy lifestyle you were living before.
5. It Never Ends
Congratulations, you've managed to lose your 100lbs...now what. Surprise, surprise, you may be thinking you did all this amazing hard work to get yourself to lose your ton of weight and then you get to the end and you may feel like, okay, all I need to do now is just exist, but it never ends. If you want to keep yourself fit and healthy, you must maintain. You must continue to exercise and eat right for the rest of your life. Don't think of this as some sort of punishment or hell that comes after your elation and joy, but rather what everyone else is doing to, what you need to do if you don't want to have to go through all that you did to get to this point ever again. Put up pictures and reminders of how bad it was, and if you feel like giving up again, take a step back and put things into perspective.
6. Your Journey is a powerful one
How many people wish they could have done something, say they are going to do something, but they never even try? This is the story of so many people, but when you go through losing such a vast amount of weight, it can completely alter the course of your life. Some people have never known what it's like to be healthy and others haven't been healthy in a while, but when you come out on the other side, it's knowing you achieved what many said or thought was impossible including yourself. Day 1 you is not going to be day 365 you in the sense that you will know and understand struggling, perservering, fighting through your demons, keeping your head up, dealing with adversity, getting through workouts even when you just wanted to give up. You will know what it truly means to not give up on yourself or your dreams. That energy can trickle into other parts of your life and into other things you wanted to accomplish. Being overweight or obese can severely limit the things physically you are able to do and places you can go, but when you are on your journey and you finish, know that you've done it, and the only person who can ever take that victory away from you is you, but don't let that happen ever again!
Six MORE Things You Learn From Losing A Lot of Weight
Thanks for this. I have a couple of friends who worked really, really hard to lose weight and now it's creeping back and they're just so worn-out and demoralised. This is a good reminder for me not to give up.
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myTake Owner
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You're welcome. Sorry to hear about your friends. It's tough whether you have support or not, because you truly are going toe to toe with yourself and fighting to be this new person mentally and physically. As a rule of thumb in my life, anyone who is trying to do anything to make their lives better, should be applauded and supported. This is my small way of saying to anyone who is thinking about long term weight loss, or currently on a program, or finishing and maintaining that the work means something, going through it means something, and that losing the weight is caring for yourself in the most loving way. Good luck to you and your friends. I hope they can find their way back. I'm rooting for you and them!
- Avoid orange juice (loaded with preservatives) - Avoid TV dinners (preservatives galore, turn to fat almost instantly) - Eat more vegetables (they help keep blood sugar regular, as low blood sugar leads to rapid weight gain) - Avoid special diet foods (they're a scam) - Avoid Facebook games (they make everything take longer than it should. They're worse than crack.)
You'll lose 40-50 pounds that way, even without rigorous exercise. (Though exercise does help a lot.)
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myTake Owner
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Very good tips. I'd say avoid fruit juices all together and opt for natural fruits as fruit juices tend to have tons of sugar added to them. I also totally agree about diet foods and tv dinners. Too many preservatives and unnatural ingredients, and typically pumped full of salt which is only going to make you retain water weight and is really bad for you if you already have heart issues.
Speaking as someone who has been there, I commend you. Both of your Takes are excellent. I experienced all of those things also.
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myTake Owner
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Thank you. It's very freeing for me to talk about it because I think a lot of people on the outside just think, oh, well, you go to the gym and eat some salad, what's so hard about that, but losing significant weight is so difficult and you have to stay so focused and find that super inner strength to keep pushing through. When I see people now who are in it, I just want to hug them and say, keep going.
You're welcome! :) My experience wasn't the same as yours. Most of the people who witnessed it were impressed and commended me for it. Some still tell me how impressed they are, that the old me is unrecognizable.
There are so many things people don't understand. For example, creating the circumstances that allowed this to happen is difficult, and when problems come up where the easy solution is changing those circumstances, people are frustrated by my reluctance to do so. Like so many others, they don't understand that this is like alcoholism in that stopping drinking doesn't make you "not an alcoholic." It is a life-long commitment.
The other thing I have learned, too, is that losing weight and being more attractive to women isn't a magic bullet. It doesn't really make me more attractive. For example, after so many short-term relationships that didn't last past getting naked, it finally dawned on me that loose skin and stretch marks were probably repulsive to them. This situation is probably even worse for women.
For that reason, and for many more, I would like to be in a relationship with a woman who has lost a tremendous amount of weight, and whose body might not be perfect but is committed to good health.
Trouble is, even when you lose weight you are discouraged from discussing it, because even though it is a huge part of who you are, I have been told it is a turn-off to women, who are afraid you'll gain it all back.
Yes! I equate it with alcoholism all the time which is kind of ironic because I've never had a drink in my life, but the only difference is that no one is going to arrest you for driving while eating 4 big macs, and very few will tell you to your face that you have a problem or will try and intervene to get you help because its one of the most easily noticeable problems, but no one is really willing to talk about it. As for the second part, it is a bummer for box sexes. my friend who lost 120lbs so he could fulfill his dream to be a cop, talks about his side of things and how its like, they see my face, but then when things heat up, many can't hide their discomfort or disgust with his body underneath the clothes. He wants skin surgery but like most people, just can't afford the extra expense or time off. I hope someone will finally see you and not just the skin. I know what its been like for me, but I try my best to remain optimistic and not focus on people who won't see past that.
Even when you do have surgery, there are scars. If you get a tummy tuck, for example, there will be a long scar across your entire midsection. Women have commented on it. And it doesn't address other skin in other spots, which, if operated on, would leave more scars. Surgery isn't a magic bullet either.
yes, I've seen the scars this type of surgery creates. Right above your privates from practically hip to hip, you would have a long scar, and if you did your arms, it would be a long scar along the bottom and if you did your chest for guys, scars under your pecs, but for some it is worth it for their peace of mind. They feel as though that is the reward for their natural end results, to see the skin cut away to reveal the shape they've wanted. I had a non cosmetic surgery years ago that left me with a scar that I see everyday, and its a reminder of a very scary time for me. I personally don't want any more scars, but I'm also not going to tell someone else not to get them because it is each person's journey and what they ultimately feel works for them and their life. They might not feellike the scars are emotional scars or they might. Either way, if you don't have it together on the inside, no surgery is going to cure that as I said in my first list, weight loss doesn't solve all probl
I agree with everything you just said. Only thing I would add is that people who might be considering surgery should be aware of the scarring that will be left. I completely agree, I had the tummy tuck and am glad I did. I prefer it to the skin, but it's a big scar and women notice it, usually not in a good way.
The surgery was also expensive. It was a capper on the experience of the weight loss, a final gesture to complete the process, and something that motivates me to keep the weight off. I can't imagine repeating that surgery.
Lol, the guys who didn't pay attention to you or the guys who were your "just" your friends now think your amazing and want to " woo " you, snow that you lost the weight they aren't embarrassed to be seen with you. Lol, funny things is you don't and never have seen them as anything more than a friend or acquaintance.
I'm sorry, Losing weight is easy. Let me tell you what's hard: changing your personality. i laugh at women who lose weight to look good. For men, they have to be that plus have some unicorn personality. Try going from a nice guy to an assertive guy. You have to deconstruct your subconscious and rebuild it again, which is friggin hard.
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myTake Owner
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I'm sorry you feel like you have to change your personality for some reason. That is your personal choice, but this take is about what all goes into losing a lot of weight and its after effects. You might want to think about creating your own take on your other personal issues that are off topic for this.
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