A SMARTE Way to Manage Depression

[Insightfull]

Now THAT'S SMARTE!🤣

Choose what messages you surround yourself with and focus on.

I recently invented an extremely effective therapy I call SMARTE: Suggestions & Mood and Affect Rejuvenation Through Empathy.

I empathize with pictures of attractive women who are displaying expressions of the mood that I want to feel. I use them as desktop backgrounds in a slideshow to increase frequency of exposures.

Notes:
- Women because women affect me more. It's likely that men would work better for women.

- Attractive because I have learned that the effect is more pronounced when I find the woman's face attractive.

- The pictures are deliberately not sexual/sexy. The point is to feel happy.

- I haven't been in a relationship since I invented this. When I am, I'll replace these with pictures of my smiling girlfriend so she won't be jealous (plus, pictures of a smiling woman I love would make me way happier lol).

Relationships and depression

A woman thought she was unlovable because of depression

I've been in love and been loved. All my relationships have been great. I just don't let it affect my love life.

It's ok to feel happy being with someone, the happiest I ever feel is with a woman I love.

The key is to not make your partner feel like they are responsible for your happiness. It feels great to be a happiness in a woman's life. So be cheer-up-able! 😊

You can do the same. You are not unlovable. :) <3

---------------------------------

Inb4 another idiot says “hurr durr, I think your idea would work better with actual women”

1.) Relying on someone else to make you happy is called "Dependence." They are not responsible for your happiness. That's not fair to them.

Imagine if every time someone wanted to be happy they would come to you and tell you to smile so that they can feel better.

2.) A picture can be selected to a desired mood. I can completely control the messages that I want to absorb. This control does not (and should not) exist with another person.

[Anoniemus]

All depressions aren’t the same and most are heritable. It’s a life long process that plenty have to deal with aside from situational depression.

I haven’t ever had it though I know one life event that can completely cause it for me. But telling them to cheer up doesn’t help. Actual depression is so debilitating and tiring. I couldn’t imagine dealing with it. And the same treatment doesn’t work for everyone because everyone has different brain chemistries

[peachyknees]

Sadly, many people misuse this word whenever they feel sad/ in a bad mood/ unsatisfied etc.

[Insightfull]

Yeah, I guess this wouldn't work for everyone, but that's mostly because nobody's trying it. At least I tried to help though :)

[Insightfull]

@peachyknees Yeah I know eh? oh well, not much we can do about them.. well, if I'm feeling motivated enough I educate them on what depression is

[Insightfull]

The chemistry of depression is a certain way, so a lot of the things.. but this SMARTE thing should work for anyone

[devilish-cutie]

But your relationship with other people is vital part for you to be happy. Its like your life depends on the fact that you need to eat. Another thing is to force others to give their love to you and solve your problems.

[Insightfull]

No, your life should not depend on your relationship in the same way that you need food to eat.
Forcing others to give their love to you is very different.. are you talking about rape?

[Insightfull]

@devilish-cutie This SMARTE thing gives you a way to reduce your dependence.
Take pictures of your boyfriend smiling and put them in places you will see them a lot (slideshow background of your computer)

Try it! Let me know :)

[devilish-cutie]

No, Im not talking about rape lol
I was just disagreeing with you, same like humans need food we also need social interactions and love otherwise wed go mad. There are studies on this. Lack of love and abuse from early age can make people socipaths.
That advice doesn't sound good, it just make reminds you of something you dont have. You yourself trying to laugh more I think would have better effect for you to feel better. But feeling better is just a way of coping, you still need to resolve your problems in order toever be ok.

[Durvarius]

I have found that it's easy to get lost in the endless circle of "am I depressed because I'm alone, or alone because I'm depressed?" The depression I suffer from is a side effect but there are times where I fall into that thought process. It is a struggle and there are set backs but the destination is worth the battle.

[Insightfull]

@Durvarius ya, I have made the joke, "I'm not sure if I'm depressed or my life is just shit" lol
But yes I am. I have learned many things I use to manage it.

The question of "Am I depressed because I'm alone or alone because I'm depressed" seems like a good candidate for CBT. What I like about CBT is that it's very helpful for challenging negative thoughts. This SMARTE therapy I made is not for that, and would be glossing over a negative thought process that is leading you to feel more depressed.

CBT be like: Thoughts influence feelings influence behaviors. Consider how realistic that thought is and create an alternative, realistic, thought to replace it with. (unrealistic positive is not helpful).
(I note that feelings influence thoughts too, and that's where a loop can form)

Which cognitive distortions apply to the thought?
psychcentral.com/.../

Weigh the evidence:
What is the evidence for the thought being true?
What is the evidence for the thought being false?

Rewrite the thought into a more realistic version of it.

Is there anything you can do to improve the situation that the thought references?

[Insightfull]

SMARTE is good for maintaining a desirable mood

[pizzalovershouse]

They say brite led day ligh lights help using a houf a day an also helps alzheimer's by 50 percent lack of good sun light through the eyes can be part of problem you dong have to stare at it just ave it shine from a bit higher than you sitting

[Insightfull]

@pizzalovershouse I've tried that and it doesn't work.. placebo effect at best. This thing I invented works. It works better than anything else, except maybe CBT, but they solve different problems (challenging unrealistic negative thinking vs maintaining a positive mood). Works WAY better than anti-depressants, but that's a really low bar

[pizzalovershouse]

Well manh react to diffrent things in diffrent ways

[Insightfull]

@pizzalovershouse have you tried it?

[Insightfull]

We react to some things in very similar ways. Especially, people with depression react to certain things in certain ways (in general).

More specifically, this SMARTE thing of mine.. I believe this will work on any man who likes women and has at least normal capacity for empathy. (ie: probably won't work on someone who hates women, or has a personality disorder (and thus lacks empathetic capacity)).

Just stare at the picture and feel her.

[pizzalovershouse]

Well see a good therapist an see if you can find what's created the mental blocks if that doesn't help then see a neuro surgeon to get a brain scan if it's not a lack of vitamins in diet to some thing like your body can't process iron or copper usely any form of nuts like almonds an peanuts help the mind but junk food contains so many chemicals an soaps the body

[pizzalovershouse]

Thanks for mho 👍

[notatrap]

Interesting idea. Willing to try it, its almost fate that you are using this woman slideshow.

Read 'The Game' by Neil Strauss if you need an ego boost with women. The entire book is about a man's life hitting on women in LA. Its a really good read though.

[Unit1]

Glad you said exactly manage depression and not cure depression.

It's good that you can manage your depression. For everybody the methods and treatments are different. You happen to have found yours. So have I.

For many people I see they deliberately are going towards their depression rather than going the opposite direction. Even when warning them or guiding them away or giving them the tools, the knowledge, the directions they keep doing what they're doing. For them there's literally no saving. For these suicide bombers there's just one solution - Holding your distance.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Nice mytake. And a good healthy way to deal with depression. If it works for you, don't listen to others. Glad you found a way to deal with your depression, so many don't and spiral down further

[Insightfull]

@Brainsbeforebeauty Thanks <3
You're caring

[Insightfull]

Always up in my things being all supportive and stuff lol 🥰
I just thought I'd throw that out there.. Thanks!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

You're welcome. "All up in your things" sounds funny 😂😂

[Insightfull]

Heheh yea 😂😂

[GraveDoll]

Oh wow...

SOOO many years and decades of research and wasted science when... when

the answer was so simple

*sarcasm*

depression is so much more than affirmative and many people have depression outside of dating. how the hell does dating cause depression anyway and i think you should see a therapist.

[Taylor_C]

There's a huge difference between being clinically depressed and feeling down. If you have an actual depression, it's like being caught in a vortex of darkness, and there's nothing you can do but wait it out. If you're feeling down, you can affect the mood by affirmative thoughts and actions.

[Insightfull]

You can do this. I have MDD. I'm telling you it works. You can believe me or not.
I call the vortex of darkness the abyss of infinite sadness. That's cute you have the same thing :)

[Insightfull]

@Taylor_C Try it! Let me know :)

This SMARTE thing solves the problem of falling into the abyss of infinite sadness: when there's no unrealistic negative thought to challenge with CBT, just the mood bringing me down

[TheLittleInnocent]

Oh my lol ur abbreviation is so punny (≧▽≦) the dad joke queen approves ( ˘ω˘ )

[Insightfull]

@TheLittleInnocent Yay!! Thanks kiddo! :D

[Insightfull]

( ˘ω˘ )

[TheLittleInnocent]

Anytime fam•̀.̫•́✧

[Insightfull]

@TheLittleInnocent right on fam •̀.̫•́✧ <3

[Insightfull]

(づ｡◕‿‿◕｡) づ

[TheLittleInnocent]

ε==(づ′▽`) づ

[Insightfull]

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕) ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧<3*:･ﾟ✧

[TheLittleInnocent]

✧*｡٩(ˊωˋ*) و✧*｡

[Piteka5]

This is really the crux of the matter, in therapy, when a client learns he will need to take control of his situation himself that's usually when the big jump to progress happens. You got it

[Insightfull]

@Piteka5 so true man! and thanks!

Yeah, therapy is not enough.. it shows us the path, but we have to walk it.

And there are things we can learn along the way. I've read a lot and learned a lot (imagine how many therapy hours it would have taken to learn all I've learned: lifetimes (plural)). and this SMARTE thing I invented (I'm proud of this :D )

[Piteka5]

It's basically Carl Rogers way of doing things the trick is to create a environment of comprehension and emphaty so that the client can progress on his own, because only the client really knows how he feels inside

[Insightfull]

@Piteka5 I think that's half of the way.. certainly I appreciate an environment of comprehension and empathy.
I agree with encouraging the client to progress on their own (to do otherwise would create a dependence upon the therapist to solve all the client's problems lol). Simply going to therapy is not going to solve all of someone's problems, and the vast majority of the work must be done by the person who wants to improve.

Yes, only the client really knows how they feel inside, but that can be communicated..

I don't believe in the passive approach to therapy. I appreciate that my therapist challenges me on things that she thinks are worth challenging and exploring, and provides expert advice and analysis. I want her advice and analyses. That's where the value is. If I just wanted to talk in an empathetic environment I would talk to friends

[Insightfull]

I want, daresay need, my therapist to have an opinion

[Ms_Facesitter]

Stay busy, do things you enjoy and things you must in your daily life, STAY BUSY

[Insightfull]

Yeah!!
and find things that make you happy and do them :)

[Ms_Facesitter]

I thought this was a question, sorry for my random input

[msc545]

Interesting idea but I believe it's been tried. In addition to this, depending on your age and health, 15 to 60 minutes of slow, low impact continuous walking every day at your normal pace, psychotherapy weekly, and for some people *some* meds (Zoloft is popular now) will help a lot.

[ShellyShocked]

Glad you found what helps you. Music helps me.

[Insightfull]

Music helps me too!
I like to listen to happy music.

Oo.. I like this song:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=axshe21_QCQ

And this happy and love <3 :)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I6_HhzFytlU

What music do you like?

[Insightfull]

@ShellyShocked "There's walls in my mind but I can climb!" omgomgomgomg :D
But yeah try the thing. Just stare at the picture and feel him. Let me know :)

[Insightfull]

@ShellyShocked this is the best remix

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P5KaedkwuEI

[ShellyShocked]

Yeah those are pretty good songs, i wish let me post a link. Some of my favorites are Lose yourself, Killshot, remember the name, a lot of rap is trash but when its good its fucking life changing

[SecretGardenBlood65]

Good take

[Insightfull]

Thanks! :)

[Rosabelle98]

Thanks for the tips

[Insightfull]

Welcome! :)

[Insightfull]

@Rosabelle98 Try it! Let me know :)