How can I deal with anxiety while trying to sleep?

[BlueWind]

For the past few months I've been having trouble sleeping. Most of the time when I lay down at night to sleep my mind is invaded with thoughts about death, which I am horribly afraid of. More specifically, I'm not afraid of just randomly dying, but rather the inevitability and the limitation of time in my life.

Regardless, I don't think I'll be able to do away with this fear easily, that is not the focus of this question. The focus is that I want to know how to stop thinking about it before bed or find a way to deal with the anxiety that inevitably arrives.

Basically it's making sleeping very difficult. Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this? I just want some nice sleep without feeling so scared or worried.

[TheINTJ]

I have the same fear, "not just randomly dying, but rather the inevitability and the limitation of time in my life", as you said. Whenever I think of it, I also get anxious, very very much. The first time I thought of it, I was pretty young, and I got so overwhelmed by the feeling, so much so that I wanted to be with someone just to get away from my thoughts. Over time, I've learned to just deal with it. What I do is not "stop thinking about it", but rather the opposite.

I imagine how so many years I've got left to my life. I remind myself that I'm still just 19, and it already feels like I've lived so much. I'll think that probably, if I die of a natural cause, I'll die when I'm 70 or 80. So that'll be about 3 times more of how much I've already lived. Between then and now, I'll probably eventually get a job, make a career, get married, have children, raise them, watch them grow and have families of their own. I think how I'll eventually become a parent, then a grandparent, and how those feel like different worlds. Just like how my parents tell stories from their past and how it makes them feel like it was so so long ago. I try to emulate that feeling, that I'll gain so much more memories and wisdom between then and now that would make it feel worth a lifetime. Then I imagine myself as an old woman and think that maybe then I'll be contented already with what I will have had accomplished in life, and maybe then I'll be able to let go like how my parents would have had. And I imagine how maybe then, I'll even expect it coming and welcome it.

That's literally what goes on in my mind when it happens, so sorry if it's so scattered. Anyway, if I can help it - when I notice that my thoughts will be leading to that and "that feeling", I just stop and firmly tell myself that I don't want to think about it; I've got too much stuff to do to waste my time thinking about it.

[AnnVdB]

You need to find a relaxation technique or therapy :) And stop the thoughts in your mind, or learn not to follow them and let them pass by.
Also try to eat more good carbs in the evening. Fruit, sweet potatoes...

But managing the thoughts is really most crucial. A good online free course is desteni I process Lite , this can help you understand your mind and take control over it and deprogram thoughts that stress you out. You can also see real life help from therapists. People often think they dont need it, but you may, sleep is extremely important for your mental and physical well-being! You can also find relaxation cd's, books, maybe check your local library.

Hope this helps :)

[ThatAsianFellow]

As stupid as it sounds, I have anxiety and trouble sleeping when I'm alone. So I either play music or call my gf if she isn't sleeping over.

[Lyndsielee666]

Im the same exact way. I wake myself up literally 10 times a night thinking my heart wll stop while I'm sleeping. The only thing that helps me now is my boyfriend running his fingers through my hair till I fall asleep.
When I was single I had to read stephen king or dean koontz books because they put my ass to sleep. Try reading with some relaxing music on!

[been_waiting]

the way I handle it probably isn't the best but whatever...
I get up and go for a walk or do anything distracting. Take some melatonin and try to be as sleepy as possible. When bad thoughts enter your mind replace them with new ones. better yet try not thinking at all

[Anonymous]

Maybe put on some relaxing music really quietly, or you can get guided relaxation CDs that help you to feel calmer? Also making sure you're really properly tired before you go to bed so then you can go to sleep quicker + easier. I hope this is helpful + you feel better about going to sleep at night soon <3

[itsme_goodsamaritan]

Do you follow any religion? If yes, chanting helps.

[BlueWind]

Unfortunately I do not follow any religion.

[itsme_goodsamaritan]

Well then, the other alternative is to keep your mind busy with something so that stray thoughts don't enter your mind. Break the silence at bedtime, play some music (with lyrics) in the background.