How to pick up a bartender?

[Anonymous]

There is a small pub down the street from my new place that is pretty steady but not really well known. Well I went with my parents to the pub for some food and a cute bartender

was working who caught my eye. I then returned with my friends the other night for a celebration and he was there just drinking. I wanted to walk up to him but some drunk guy was hitting on me and I didn't want to be rude. If I see him again how should I approach him without looking silly?

[honeyltsme]

You already acted silly by going along with some drunk guy hitting on you instead of talking to the guy you want to talk to.

Bartenders, male and female, get hit on a LOT, plus they are constantly being interrupted, so when behind the bar they are in a position of power. When drinking like a regular guy, he is on an even ground with you.

If he seems really into you, a lame ass (meaning simple and effective but risky of him thinking less of you) way to meet him would be to leave him a fat tip (like 30-50% - it does not have to be from a huge tab, just 2-3 drinks, so the absolute amount of tip is affordable) and write a thank you, your name and number on the receipt. Some guys will let it go to their head, but if you are otherwise a great looking and classy person, the right kind of guy would take it the right way.

You could try to catch him drinking at his own bar again (which is unusual, by the way, unless he is cheap / having free drinks). Or come on like Tuesday afternoon at the beginning of his shift or something.

[Asker]

I've been thinking about what you wrote and you're completely right, I did act very silly. To clarify the situation I was in 1) I kept moving away from the guy but he moved closer 2) I thought he was gay 3) When I was able to get rid of the guy hitting on me I did try to make contact with the bartender but he was with his buddy's. I'm definitely going to take your advice and go back to the bar on the regular and see what happens.

[Anonymous]

i find it shocking that you are asking this type of question, don't most girls feel that guys should do the chasing?

[Asker]

Yes, every girl loves being chased. However, guys ask me out on the regular but I never seem to have an attraction to them. Therefore, I go for the ones that catch my eye...this is not frequent but once in a blue moon.

[Opinion Owner]

well me as a guy, I hate doing the chasing

[cjwright79]

You'll always end up looking silly. Don't bother.