How do you cope with things that hurt you?

[Anonymous]

I am honestly in a very bad state in my life, i feel very insecure, i am very jealous and I HATE how i look. It’s developing into eating disorders and a lot of mental problems/self esteem issues. As a woman i have noticed a lot of conversations that women have seem to trigger me. I get triggered by conversations about food, dieting, clothes, sizes, makeup, calories, hair etc all these topics and more REALLLLY get on my nerves. I get so agitated and i don’t know how to deal with my emotions. What are good methods for me to deal with my feelings… should i leave the room? Should i act like I can’t hear their conversations, should i count my fingers? I just need strategies which will keep me distracted and unengaged in conversations which harm me deeply.

[Oliverlogan263]

Ugh girl, I totally feel you. That stuff used to get to me big time too. Here are some strategies that helped me deal without losing it:

- headphones! Pop some music on to drown them out when convos start getting triggering.

- fake a text - look at your phone and start "replying" so you have an excuse not to listen

- change the subject - ask them an unrelated question to steer the chat elsewhere

- take a walk - say you need some air then remove yourself from the situation

- deep breathing - when you start feeling heat, just focus on slow breaths til it passes

- compliment them - "nice shirt!".. redirects attention and kind words help calm nerves

- be honest - "I'd rather not discuss that, can we talk about something fun?"

Don't be afraid to remove yourself if needed either. Your mental health is important. Stay strong girl - you've got this! Soon enough their words won't faze you at all anymore.

[TommyMountainFigure]

The way I see it is:-

Everybody has two options when it comes to how they deal with all those things you mentioned.

The first one is how you're choosing to deal with it, upsetting yourself binge eating, and then hating yourself for it so you end up in a loop of self defeating and self loathing.

The second is my way, Get yourself a pro punchbag and training gloves then try punching and kicking the life out of it. You won't, but if you imagine all your enemies and inner demons as that bag, it feels better than shovelling food down your gullet, before during AND afterwards.

I grant you, out of the two, your way is easier because you are letting yourself slide away. But I don't believe in letting my enemies or demons win. My way will give you immense satisfaction and hurts less too..

[MemeSupreme]

i kinda just try to avoid bad habits that like reinforce it and anything that triggers me

obviously you can't always do that so i just try to make it a habit to ignore that shit bc you can get it better at it. it's annoying it'll never full get away but you can train your brain so it's less intense