Guys...is something fishy going on here or am I overreacting?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend and I been together a couple years and we work opposite shifts. When he gets home from work at 2am ish he would wake me AS SOON as he got home to talk for awhile. I was fine with it. Now that we live together, he doesn't come talk to me until he has been home for about an hour or so. And he knows that he is doing that because one day he came in the room and I had little interest in talking and his comment was "what are you mad because I didn't come right down here to talk like I normally do?" And then when he gets to bed he wants sex. Why the strange behavior?

He used to also text me and say he was on his way home. Now he doesn't and he comes home a little later than normal some days. Am I overreacting?

Updates

+1 y

He used to also text me when he got up and say hi. Now he doesn't do that unless I text him first. We JUST moved in together the first of the year.

[287687has]

Unfortunately it does seem that you are looking a little to deep into this. Now that you two live together he is going to become a little more relaxed over time. The things that he used to do back then may not be as important to him now. Not that he doesn't love you, his just settling into his surroundings. Let it roll off your shoulder for awhile and see what happens. If he gets to relaxed, let him know that you enjoy those things and see if he responds. Keeping mind that the first 2 years of living together are the hardest because you both will do some settling and you both have to adjust to each other. Be concerned if it gets worse and talk to him about your concerns. Part of growing together is learning to work these things out between the two of you.

[aMuse]

He use to come talk to you right away because he wanted sex. You wanted to talk... He probably got tired of all the talking, and a few times of long talks that didn't lead to sex so he was like meh I'm cutting my loses on this. No more long talk to try and get sex, I'll just watch some TV and relax after a long day of work for an hour, then see if she wants sex. If so great, if not I'm hitting the sack and getting some zZzZzs.

[Asker]

Just the opposite. He usually gets sex whether he talks or not. Except right now while I am trying to figure him out.

[Anonymous]

Maybe now that you live together he doesn't feel the need to be in contact so often or straight away since he knows you're there all the time anyway since you live there.

But sadly, that's how relationships generally work, regardless of whether you move in together or not. Guys make more of an effort in the beginning.

[thisusername2]

That is how relationships work. After some time people become complacent. I think you are overreacting.

[Anonymous]

Yes you're over reacting.

[Moloch]

Over-reacting.