Asking a shy coworker to hangout?

[Anonymous]

So I have this super shy coworker who I like very platonically as a friend and would like to see if maybe he might want to hangout with me sometime. But I don't know what to ask him to go do with me because I know he's a picky eater and don't think he goes out much I know he likes books. And metal music.

[jahaims]

Make it clear you only want friendship. A shy guy who doesn't socialize is easy to accidentally lead on.

[Asker]

I'm sure he knows I'm not after a relationship I am engaged after all

[In_Trance]

He likes fucking.
So of you ask him to hang out, be ready to rail him

[Asker]

Lol pretty sure that isn't on his mind I'm not the girl people talk to for that.

[In_Trance]

Guarantee it is on his mind

[Asker]

Well yah probably but I'm 100% certain sex with me specifically is not what's on his mind

[In_Trance]

If you present yourself as an option it's definitely on his mind

[Asker]

I can assure you it's not the only people who want in my pants is lesbians men not so much

[AI Opinion]

Why not suggest visiting a local bookstore or a music store with him? 📚🎶 It's a relaxed environment where he might feel more comfortable, plus it touches on his interests. You could even propose grabbing a coffee afterward to discuss your finds. It's a friendly, no-pressure way for him to hang out and bond. Just keep it casual and be yourself. 😊

[capriVib]

ıt usually, men are expected to make the first move to hang out. But if you're really interested, you might invite him for coffee at your home.

[Asker]

Well I probably won't invite him to my house and I'm pretty sure he doesn't like coffee from what I can tell he typically drink's water and mountain dew he's kinda hard to figure out

[capriVib]

If it were another guy, he might have realized you had a platonic crush on him based on how you acted around him and would have made a move. It’s werid , though—maybe because it’s a workplace, he’s being cautious about mixing romance with work. I’d say let it go. You’ve already done your part. Try meeting someone outside of work instead.

[Asker]

I'm not trying to date him I think people are misunderstanding my intentions I don't want to romance him or anything just be his friend

[capriVib]

men and women can’t really be close friends in a purely platonic sense. If you just want to spend time together as friends, you should make female friends instead

[Asker]

Why can't they have several male friends and other is nothing more to it than friendship it's not like he is going to jump my bones the moment I ask him to go to a bookstore Im pretty sure he knows I'm not interested in a romantic way I'm engaged after all not to mention I'm pretty sure I'm not his type to begin with

[capriVib]

I used to think like you back in the day. During middle and high school, I had a lot of female friends. My mom would even joke, 'You have too many girlfriends—try making some guy friends!' 😂 But as adulthood hit, most of my female friends started getting married or into serious relationships, and I lost touch with all of them. It made me realize that trying to have 'just friends' with women often ends up feeling like a waste of time. That’s why I think it’s smarter for men and women to maintain boundaries in places like work or school, keeping friendships practical and mutually beneficial while avoiding getting too close

[capriVib]

Here’s another common scenario: When you hang out as close friends—if the guy is physically, capital, mental strong or the woman is attractive and well-groomed—there’s always a chance one person might develop feelings for the other. In the end, a purely platonic friendship is hardly realistic

[Asker]

I can't say I personally have ever had this issue I'm engaged have been for several years but I still talk to my guy friends infact my guy friend Shawn came to visit and stayed with me for a week we walked my garden and talked about our future farm plans.

Talked about his x girlfriend and his fight with her. We lagit just talked to each other for a week straight eating pizza and neither one of Us is interested in the other in a romantic way talked to him every day for years.
I have probably 4 guy friends I talk to like this.

I'm sorry that was your experience though

But I'm not exactly a lust trap or anything so falling for me is never really a risk.

I figured I'd just invite him to something and if he wants to go great if he doesn't I'll let it go and I'll leave him alone and try not to bother him

[capriVib]

Actually, these four people aren’t your close friends—they’re "backups" you’ve kept on standby to secure yourself in case problems arise between you and your fiancé. If they’re such close "friends," the moment you show even the slightest emotional or sexual interest in any of them, they’ll make a move to get into your pants. Experience and observations prove that men and women can’t truly be close friends. (💊🔴)

[Asker]

I don't have backups I wouldn't ever date or marry them they are good friends but I wouldn't ever make that kind of commitment with them we are very different people.

Maybe it's different for other women but I'm not conveniently attractive so it seems to work just fine for me

[strateguy632]

Make sure you say "i want to be your friend" after you ask "what do you like to do for fun"

[biraileeşkadını]

Show interest in him, smile.

[Asker]

Oh I smile and talk to him all the time I'm trying to invite him to go do something

[biraileeşkadını]

Hm good