@jayman...I completely agree with you about the kiss and passion. The issue is that it still doesn't mean sex and in todays world most people don't know the difference. Women have come along way sexually however what we once were has now swung to the oppossite side of the pendulum. Our young adults who have only witnessed us as we are now have no clue how to handle relationships. We have young women afraid to not have sex because they don't want to lose a man, we have TV and movies telling them
Compatibility in other ways, the truth is that poeple just don't want to lol and believe me I'm not na?ve to why people don't want to but its clear that their are certain sacrafices that people are willing to make and ones that they are not lol even if it meant to possibly have a stronger relationship. It just goes to show what we value now and what takes priority.
@Jayman...lol I have a totally different view on sexual compatibility lol. The fact that most people feel that the only way to assess this is to have sex is interesting. Of course I see the logic because its the easiest way to find out but truly question what people consider the word compatible to mean. Its like do you actually have to put your hand on the stove to find out its hot lol or can you gather the information you need from other key attributes.its not that people can't decipher
almost think it impossible for people to focus elsewhere.Regarding mistakes, I learned at a young age that if I am fortunate to witness and learn a lesson from someone else's life then why do I need to learn the hard way myself lol.There are different types of mistakes and they all do not need to be learned first hand.Yes everyone is different but most of us,despite popular belief,on a basic level all want the same things so why not learn from each other.Thats actually the premise of this site.
@Jay-Man...thanks for reading. Most people want marriage and love to be one in the same and sadly that is where we are missing the mark. They should not be to separate distinctions for one to trump the other. I think your relationship sounds great and I am glad that things are working out for you but my point is which again is being missed is that of all the rules you only felt the need to comment on the sex rule.Sex/making love is being held at such a high priority in relationships that I would
@happydrifter...finally someone that is aware of what I am talking about. No one else on this site seems to know what I am referring to and I am certain some don't even know that this occurs, everyone has jumped to the conclusion that it was a religious agenda. That is absolutely correct currently the timeframe is 3days-week for women and 3hrs-1day for men of emotional connectivity after sex.Thanks for reading. I truly appreciate your comment.
@stillagooggirl...hi there. thanks for reading. Believe me I completely understand and that was also my fear as well however it ended up being quite the opposite, more men were interested and intrigued by my choice especially since it was made clear that if it was not an option for them that it would mean the end of our dating. I will admit that one or two did move on but the issue women of today have is the belief that there is a shortage of good men and that is not true so its OK if one walks
@gettinthroughthepain...thanks for reading. hmmm I wonder which rule gave you that impression lol. You prove my point as the only rule you felt the need to chalk up to my religion. How about I chose not to have sex before I was relgious and it had nothing to do with religion. Stereotyping is never good it always makes you show your true thoughts in your assumptions. This is exactly my point, people can't conceive not having sex unless it is religious lol
So my point, is that people need to rethink their priorities in relationships. If its more important to find out who and what you are really dealing with then my suggestion is to try removing the sexual aspect of the relationship up front to allow you to see things more clearly. We are in a time where women want to pretend that there is no connection however they then end up coming to me for advice to find out how they missed something they shouldve saw and usual early sex is the culprit. Thanks
I am referring to. People can't even fathom not having sex unless there is a religious reason lol. How about just not having sex because you want to get to know someone before you make a lifelong commitment. My point about sex is not religious. My point is that people do not understand and/or ignore the physical and mental aspects of sex. Having a sexual bond before knowing what you need to know can create judgement impairments in a relationship mostly on the females part but also occurs in men.
@TessAshwin...thanks for reading. As I stated there are tons of people that have married and had sex before marriage. I'm not trying to debate that you can't get married I'm trying to provide a tool to increase the longevity of marriage. It is interesting to me that the more objection there is to rule3 the more it proves my point how consummed people have become with sex and what the priorities are. In addition, I actually I compiled these rules before I became religious.Again this is also what
I really don't agree with # 3 cause there are men and women who have married even though they have slept with several people. Its not sex but love towards each other,. The way you speak in this article surely speaks your very religious. I had once believed in the same myth not to have sex before marriage but I must say rarely you will find anyone like that now a days. And even if you do they are mainly ugly and pathetic people. Cause no one wants to sleep them neither love them.
my years of lending my ear to both men and women, it's clear to me that neither truly understand what physically and mentally occurs when you have sex, or worse it is being dismissed. We are now in a time where women are trying to pretend that they are not as emotionally connected to sex and men are actually believing it yet I deal with the results of this daily and see firsthand what it is doing to our young adults. Our young adults are lost on relationships and what a good relationship is.
@HiddenP...thanks for reading. This is pretty much my compilation of rules depicting where I have seen other women go wrong. I have definitely discussed them with other women unfortunately they are usually on the opposite end of doing them and are in a bad situation by the time they come to me so in a way I am trying to circumvent other women from having to go through certain things if they could learn them now instead of later. I know that the sex rule is a hard pill to swallow but throughout
that can work here, what if you sample it before you buy it and then when you get it home it soon expires lol. The point is that sex is being held to such a high standard, even more so than the characteristics that should really count. Thanks for reading, I hope you liked the rest of the article.
@kholland65...lots of people having difficulty with the sex lesson. I truly believe that there are others way to get the answers to your questions in a relationship as I did it myself but asking people to actually wait on sex in 2012 is like asking to pull a tooth.Its funny because the reaction that I am getting to it is exactly why I put it as a rule.People don't realize how high a priority sex is made to be and what its doing to our young adults that are watching us.There are tons of anologies
@candlewax...I'm also sorry that it is 2012 and our divorce rates are higher than ever. It amazes me how in business if someone was losing money at the rate of increase as divorce that people would pay attention that something needs to change and that the current formula is not working.
@moaterboat...thanks a lot for your comment. I was really starting to wonder if there was any point in me sharing my experiences with people. Part of my point is exactly that we are so hung up on sex that now it is a mandatory requirement but what really made write it is because I see what that is doing to our young adults.Now it is presented to them by our generation, TV and movies that if they are not having sex in a relationship that something is wrong with them. Thank you very much !
It's unfortunate that so many people are hung up on the sex part of the article. There is a lot of good advice here and most women would really benefit to pay attention to the little things. Rules 9, 7, and especially one I think are sorely overlooked and neglected. Instead some people get to rule 3 and focus on that, as if the article is calling into question their morals or something.
@sixstring...almost missed your comment but I just saw it. The statement I made that you think is an extreme that I pitted together is funny because I didn't make that up nor did it come from me, that is literally the content of some of the questions from young women on this site lol. Again thanks for reading and your comments but we can just agree to disagree respectfully but I love the discussion.Thanks again
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@jayman...I completely agree with you about the kiss and passion. The issue is that it still doesn't mean sex and in todays world most people don't know the difference. Women have come along way sexually however what we once were has now swung to the oppossite side of the pendulum. Our young adults who have only witnessed us as we are now have no clue how to handle relationships. We have young women afraid to not have sex because they don't want to lose a man, we have TV and movies telling them
Compatibility in other ways, the truth is that poeple just don't want to lol and believe me I'm not na?ve to why people don't want to but its clear that their are certain sacrafices that people are willing to make and ones that they are not lol even if it meant to possibly have a stronger relationship. It just goes to show what we value now and what takes priority.
@Jayman...lol I have a totally different view on sexual compatibility lol. The fact that most people feel that the only way to assess this is to have sex is interesting. Of course I see the logic because its the easiest way to find out but truly question what people consider the word compatible to mean. Its like do you actually have to put your hand on the stove to find out its hot lol or can you gather the information you need from other key attributes.its not that people can't decipher
almost think it impossible for people to focus elsewhere.Regarding mistakes, I learned at a young age that if I am fortunate to witness and learn a lesson from someone else's life then why do I need to learn the hard way myself lol.There are different types of mistakes and they all do not need to be learned first hand.Yes everyone is different but most of us,despite popular belief,on a basic level all want the same things so why not learn from each other.Thats actually the premise of this site.
@Jay-Man...thanks for reading. Most people want marriage and love to be one in the same and sadly that is where we are missing the mark. They should not be to separate distinctions for one to trump the other. I think your relationship sounds great and I am glad that things are working out for you but my point is which again is being missed is that of all the rules you only felt the need to comment on the sex rule.Sex/making love is being held at such a high priority in relationships that I would
@happydrifter...finally someone that is aware of what I am talking about. No one else on this site seems to know what I am referring to and I am certain some don't even know that this occurs, everyone has jumped to the conclusion that it was a religious agenda. That is absolutely correct currently the timeframe is 3days-week for women and 3hrs-1day for men of emotional connectivity after sex.Thanks for reading. I truly appreciate your comment.
@stillagooggirl...hi there. thanks for reading. Believe me I completely understand and that was also my fear as well however it ended up being quite the opposite, more men were interested and intrigued by my choice especially since it was made clear that if it was not an option for them that it would mean the end of our dating. I will admit that one or two did move on but the issue women of today have is the belief that there is a shortage of good men and that is not true so its OK if one walks
@gettinthroughthepain...thanks for reading. hmmm I wonder which rule gave you that impression lol. You prove my point as the only rule you felt the need to chalk up to my religion. How about I chose not to have sex before I was relgious and it had nothing to do with religion. Stereotyping is never good it always makes you show your true thoughts in your assumptions. This is exactly my point, people can't conceive not having sex unless it is religious lol
So my point, is that people need to rethink their priorities in relationships. If its more important to find out who and what you are really dealing with then my suggestion is to try removing the sexual aspect of the relationship up front to allow you to see things more clearly. We are in a time where women want to pretend that there is no connection however they then end up coming to me for advice to find out how they missed something they shouldve saw and usual early sex is the culprit. Thanks
I am referring to. People can't even fathom not having sex unless there is a religious reason lol. How about just not having sex because you want to get to know someone before you make a lifelong commitment. My point about sex is not religious. My point is that people do not understand and/or ignore the physical and mental aspects of sex. Having a sexual bond before knowing what you need to know can create judgement impairments in a relationship mostly on the females part but also occurs in men.
@TessAshwin...thanks for reading. As I stated there are tons of people that have married and had sex before marriage. I'm not trying to debate that you can't get married I'm trying to provide a tool to increase the longevity of marriage. It is interesting to me that the more objection there is to rule3 the more it proves my point how consummed people have become with sex and what the priorities are. In addition, I actually I compiled these rules before I became religious.Again this is also what
I really don't agree with # 3 cause there are men and women who have married even though they have slept with several people. Its not sex but love towards each other,. The way you speak in this article surely speaks your very religious. I had once believed in the same myth not to have sex before marriage but I must say rarely you will find anyone like that now a days. And even if you do they are mainly ugly and pathetic people. Cause no one wants to sleep them neither love them.
my years of lending my ear to both men and women, it's clear to me that neither truly understand what physically and mentally occurs when you have sex, or worse it is being dismissed. We are now in a time where women are trying to pretend that they are not as emotionally connected to sex and men are actually believing it yet I deal with the results of this daily and see firsthand what it is doing to our young adults. Our young adults are lost on relationships and what a good relationship is.
@HiddenP...thanks for reading. This is pretty much my compilation of rules depicting where I have seen other women go wrong. I have definitely discussed them with other women unfortunately they are usually on the opposite end of doing them and are in a bad situation by the time they come to me so in a way I am trying to circumvent other women from having to go through certain things if they could learn them now instead of later. I know that the sex rule is a hard pill to swallow but throughout
that can work here, what if you sample it before you buy it and then when you get it home it soon expires lol. The point is that sex is being held to such a high standard, even more so than the characteristics that should really count. Thanks for reading, I hope you liked the rest of the article.
@kholland65...lots of people having difficulty with the sex lesson. I truly believe that there are others way to get the answers to your questions in a relationship as I did it myself but asking people to actually wait on sex in 2012 is like asking to pull a tooth.Its funny because the reaction that I am getting to it is exactly why I put it as a rule.People don't realize how high a priority sex is made to be and what its doing to our young adults that are watching us.There are tons of anologies
@candlewax...I'm also sorry that it is 2012 and our divorce rates are higher than ever. It amazes me how in business if someone was losing money at the rate of increase as divorce that people would pay attention that something needs to change and that the current formula is not working.
@moaterboat...thanks a lot for your comment. I was really starting to wonder if there was any point in me sharing my experiences with people. Part of my point is exactly that we are so hung up on sex that now it is a mandatory requirement but what really made write it is because I see what that is doing to our young adults.Now it is presented to them by our generation, TV and movies that if they are not having sex in a relationship that something is wrong with them. Thank you very much !
It's unfortunate that so many people are hung up on the sex part of the article. There is a lot of good advice here and most women would really benefit to pay attention to the little things. Rules 9, 7, and especially one I think are sorely overlooked and neglected. Instead some people get to rule 3 and focus on that, as if the article is calling into question their morals or something.
@sixstring...almost missed your comment but I just saw it. The statement I made that you think is an extreme that I pitted together is funny because I didn't make that up nor did it come from me, that is literally the content of some of the questions from young women on this site lol. Again thanks for reading and your comments but we can just agree to disagree respectfully but I love the discussion.Thanks again