use every lesson.If my article is read and even one lesson helps someone that's fine with me. I do not claim to be a know it all but I do think there is value in the things that "I" have learned. Thanks again for you input and the conversation. As long as what you do is working for you that's all that matters. Wish you the best.
@anon1111...apparently my analogy is being read into a lot deeper than it was designed to. Next I will hear that because I picked a burger instead of a BLT that I meant to call myself a piece of meat lol. As stated these are my lessons learned. My intention was simply to help others achieve what I have.so my comments being interpreted to extremes is quite interesting as I never once said that men ONLY want sex.Anywho lets just agree to disagree on that one as I never thought that everyone would
intention to share the lessons I have learned in my own personal experiences, friends, family and clients. I hear and discuss these issue everyday with different people so I am conveying the commonalities that I have experienced. thanks again and wish you the best
@selfishstars...in regards to your question about the sex before marriage. I purposely left my personal beliefs out of this article hence why I titled the article as I did and stated that it was advice for women that are looking for their husband. I am a Christian but I don't chose to push my religion on others so the article was not intended to have any implication on how women approach sex at any other point of their life. Thanks again for reading and I appreciate your comments. Again my
@selfishstars...lol my apologies if you took issue with my analog. I never even thought about the hamburger now having a missing piece etc. It was a simple analogy with a basic point, nothing to read into. Again my sincere apologies if that was interpretation, I would never imply that a woman for any reason should not be valued. As a woman myself I am not certain that would even be considered as something I would intend to say about women (which would include me). Again I wish you he best.
"women who have one night stands then want to know if there is a possibility for a relationship." You're pitting two extremes against each other. There are grey values, things in between.
If you've been together a long time, love each other and are old enough, waiting until marriage isn't necessary.
I would want to know the girl and I are sexually compatible. Sex is very important for a relationship. The vast majority of divorce cases have sexual frustration as one of the factors.
The hamburger analogy shows an almost-hilariously outdated and sexist view of female sexuality. Men no longer view a woman who has had previous partners to be "used goods". This isn't the dark ages. Most men today want a woman who has at least some sexual experience because it's part of maturing as a person (and experienced women are better in bed). You clearly have issues with the male gender if you think that men only want sex and need to be "tested" for their commitment via abstinence.
My reason for taking issue with your analogy isn't because I think you're literally saying a woman is like a hamburger, but you're suggesting that when a woman has sex with someone, part of her taken and is now missing. It suggests that when a woman has sex, she is no longer a whole person. She is lacking, and she is less valuable than someone who has not had sex.
@selfishstars...Thanks for reading.You don't have to take a defensive stance on this as I am not saying anything about women being virgins before marriage I am talking to women at the point in their life where they want a husband.Regarding the hamburger my comparison was in no way literally and no one else even thought of something like that. I would never say a woman was a hamburger lol. thanks for reading and I wish you the best.
Suggesting that a man won't want to marry a woman with sexual experience makes it seem like whether or not a woman has had sex matters more to a man when marrying her than who she is as a person, whether or not they are compatible with each other. If a man wants to marry a woman, it's generally because he loves her and wants to spend his life with her, not because she's a virgin and he'll get to be the only person to ever have sex with her.
I would never marry a man without knowing if we're sexually compatible, and talking about sex, having similar interests and views about sex, etc. do not tell you enough to know if you're sexually compatible with someone, in my opinion and experience.
Comparing a woman with sexual experience to a "hamburger with a bite taken out of it" is disgusting point of view to hold and is dehumanizing. Further, many men have no problem with a sexually experienced partner, and many even prefer it.
men need to be with someone regardless of what they are like in bed. If you can't work on that then how can you say that you would stick with someone through thick and thin if you are willing to end it over sex. I'm not saying you move forward and live with bad sex but what I am saying is that you both need to make adjustments to cater to each other. And yes I do believe talking can get you to know about compatibility, the issue is that people don't talk about sex honestly anymore.
My point is that sexual compatibility should not be a reason to end an otherwise great relationship and if you do so that speaks to what I am referring to, you are already demonstrating before you are married that you are not will to work through what is in your future vows as "the best AND the worst" everyone just wants the best part. I will also ask you again, what if you are compatible and then you get married and something happens or she flat out changes, what did your test drive prove?
@anon1111...I agree to be objective if you will agree to be objective. I put aside my religion in sex discussion but can you put to the side that you just don't want to wait until marriage and you want sex lol. the reason I say that is because let's follow your theory and you agree that sex should be used responsibly so find someone you believe is special or love and then you have sex, the sex is not compatible...are you saying that with everything else being right you will dump her? Sexual
enjoy so much but if you read the questions and concerns of women just on this site, sex is not being used responsibly and creates emotional turmoil. Most men only start to care when they have a daughter of sister and see directly how sex plays a part in a woman's life. I'm not saying everyone has to be nuns as I am talking to the women that are looking for a serious relationship but you will see in my next article the mistake that men make when it comes to sex . thanks for reading and comments
People need to have sex before they get married so that they can find out if they are sexually compatible prior to making a lifelong commitment to each other. You really think that simply talking about sex is an adequate replacement for actually experiencing it? Give me a break. Some people just don't click in the bedroom for various reasons and you need to find that out BEFORE marriage. Otherwise you're potentially setting yourself up for unhappiness, infidelity, and/or divorce.
@7gnat...thanks a bunch. Believe me I know #3 is tough and I know people are looking at my login name and think it is religious but I learned all of these lessons before I became a practicing Christian so my rules are not religious at all. they are all for a reason. I know men object because point blank you want sex but I am only talking to women who are looking for a husband at this time in their life. I know men don't really care how women are being mentally affected by what you
@sixstring...I completely understand that men have reason to be skeptical. My next article is for men that are looking for a wife (from a woman's point of view) to address most men who are against marriage and you will see that the exact thing that you object is one of the most common reasons that men end up in those situations. My login name may be throwing you off but I am a Christian but my religious beliefs are not in this article AT ALL, these are things I did before I became a Christian.
women have been putting on this site you will see that there is truth to what I say. women who have one night stands then want to know if there is a possibility for a relationship. Women who are questioning if their man is with them for them or just for sex and I can go on. My reasons are not religious at all actually. Also I am only referring to people looking for a serious relationship so it doesn't mean every girl will be a virgin til marriage lol. My comments are not all or nothing lol
@anon1111 lol I was a virgin well into my 20s and I will let you know that I knew much more about sex than most the men I met. Not having sex doesn't mean that you don't know anything. Also don't read too much into my login name. though I don't personally believe in sex before marriage that is not everyone's belief nor implied in this article that its religious. Again these are rules that I came up with after going the wrong way myself. Men will not understand but if you read the questions that
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use every lesson.If my article is read and even one lesson helps someone that's fine with me. I do not claim to be a know it all but I do think there is value in the things that "I" have learned. Thanks again for you input and the conversation. As long as what you do is working for you that's all that matters. Wish you the best.
@anon1111...apparently my analogy is being read into a lot deeper than it was designed to. Next I will hear that because I picked a burger instead of a BLT that I meant to call myself a piece of meat lol. As stated these are my lessons learned. My intention was simply to help others achieve what I have.so my comments being interpreted to extremes is quite interesting as I never once said that men ONLY want sex.Anywho lets just agree to disagree on that one as I never thought that everyone would
intention to share the lessons I have learned in my own personal experiences, friends, family and clients. I hear and discuss these issue everyday with different people so I am conveying the commonalities that I have experienced. thanks again and wish you the best
@selfishstars...in regards to your question about the sex before marriage. I purposely left my personal beliefs out of this article hence why I titled the article as I did and stated that it was advice for women that are looking for their husband. I am a Christian but I don't chose to push my religion on others so the article was not intended to have any implication on how women approach sex at any other point of their life. Thanks again for reading and I appreciate your comments. Again my
@selfishstars...lol my apologies if you took issue with my analog. I never even thought about the hamburger now having a missing piece etc. It was a simple analogy with a basic point, nothing to read into. Again my sincere apologies if that was interpretation, I would never imply that a woman for any reason should not be valued. As a woman myself I am not certain that would even be considered as something I would intend to say about women (which would include me). Again I wish you he best.
"women who have one night stands then want to know if there is a possibility for a relationship." You're pitting two extremes against each other. There are grey values, things in between.
If you've been together a long time, love each other and are old enough, waiting until marriage isn't necessary.
I would want to know the girl and I are sexually compatible. Sex is very important for a relationship. The vast majority of divorce cases have sexual frustration as one of the factors.
The hamburger analogy shows an almost-hilariously outdated and sexist view of female sexuality. Men no longer view a woman who has had previous partners to be "used goods". This isn't the dark ages. Most men today want a woman who has at least some sexual experience because it's part of maturing as a person (and experienced women are better in bed). You clearly have issues with the male gender if you think that men only want sex and need to be "tested" for their commitment via abstinence.
My reason for taking issue with your analogy isn't because I think you're literally saying a woman is like a hamburger, but you're suggesting that when a woman has sex with someone, part of her taken and is now missing. It suggests that when a woman has sex, she is no longer a whole person. She is lacking, and she is less valuable than someone who has not had sex.
@selfishstars...Thanks for reading.You don't have to take a defensive stance on this as I am not saying anything about women being virgins before marriage I am talking to women at the point in their life where they want a husband.Regarding the hamburger my comparison was in no way literally and no one else even thought of something like that. I would never say a woman was a hamburger lol. thanks for reading and I wish you the best.
Suggesting that a man won't want to marry a woman with sexual experience makes it seem like whether or not a woman has had sex matters more to a man when marrying her than who she is as a person, whether or not they are compatible with each other. If a man wants to marry a woman, it's generally because he loves her and wants to spend his life with her, not because she's a virgin and he'll get to be the only person to ever have sex with her.
I would never marry a man without knowing if we're sexually compatible, and talking about sex, having similar interests and views about sex, etc. do not tell you enough to know if you're sexually compatible with someone, in my opinion and experience.
Comparing a woman with sexual experience to a "hamburger with a bite taken out of it" is disgusting point of view to hold and is dehumanizing. Further, many men have no problem with a sexually experienced partner, and many even prefer it.
men need to be with someone regardless of what they are like in bed. If you can't work on that then how can you say that you would stick with someone through thick and thin if you are willing to end it over sex. I'm not saying you move forward and live with bad sex but what I am saying is that you both need to make adjustments to cater to each other. And yes I do believe talking can get you to know about compatibility, the issue is that people don't talk about sex honestly anymore.
My point is that sexual compatibility should not be a reason to end an otherwise great relationship and if you do so that speaks to what I am referring to, you are already demonstrating before you are married that you are not will to work through what is in your future vows as "the best AND the worst" everyone just wants the best part. I will also ask you again, what if you are compatible and then you get married and something happens or she flat out changes, what did your test drive prove?
@anon1111...I agree to be objective if you will agree to be objective. I put aside my religion in sex discussion but can you put to the side that you just don't want to wait until marriage and you want sex lol. the reason I say that is because let's follow your theory and you agree that sex should be used responsibly so find someone you believe is special or love and then you have sex, the sex is not compatible...are you saying that with everything else being right you will dump her? Sexual
enjoy so much but if you read the questions and concerns of women just on this site, sex is not being used responsibly and creates emotional turmoil. Most men only start to care when they have a daughter of sister and see directly how sex plays a part in a woman's life. I'm not saying everyone has to be nuns as I am talking to the women that are looking for a serious relationship but you will see in my next article the mistake that men make when it comes to sex . thanks for reading and comments
People need to have sex before they get married so that they can find out if they are sexually compatible prior to making a lifelong commitment to each other. You really think that simply talking about sex is an adequate replacement for actually experiencing it? Give me a break. Some people just don't click in the bedroom for various reasons and you need to find that out BEFORE marriage. Otherwise you're potentially setting yourself up for unhappiness, infidelity, and/or divorce.
@7gnat...thanks a bunch. Believe me I know #3 is tough and I know people are looking at my login name and think it is religious but I learned all of these lessons before I became a practicing Christian so my rules are not religious at all. they are all for a reason. I know men object because point blank you want sex but I am only talking to women who are looking for a husband at this time in their life. I know men don't really care how women are being mentally affected by what you
@sixstring...I completely understand that men have reason to be skeptical. My next article is for men that are looking for a wife (from a woman's point of view) to address most men who are against marriage and you will see that the exact thing that you object is one of the most common reasons that men end up in those situations. My login name may be throwing you off but I am a Christian but my religious beliefs are not in this article AT ALL, these are things I did before I became a Christian.
women have been putting on this site you will see that there is truth to what I say. women who have one night stands then want to know if there is a possibility for a relationship. Women who are questioning if their man is with them for them or just for sex and I can go on. My reasons are not religious at all actually. Also I am only referring to people looking for a serious relationship so it doesn't mean every girl will be a virgin til marriage lol. My comments are not all or nothing lol
@anon1111 lol I was a virgin well into my 20s and I will let you know that I knew much more about sex than most the men I met. Not having sex doesn't mean that you don't know anything. Also don't read too much into my login name. though I don't personally believe in sex before marriage that is not everyone's belief nor implied in this article that its religious. Again these are rules that I came up with after going the wrong way myself. Men will not understand but if you read the questions that