I'm disappointed in my boyfriend's proposal, should I tell him?

Question

It was our 1 year. Yes only 1. Which made this really awkward. So background. I'm a single mom, I was once engaged to the father but he walked out on us without a word. I started dating one my close friends for the past year. He loved me from the first day we meet, about 6 years ago. He never got the courage ask me out when I was single and I thought he was out of my league. About a year after my ex left we started dating, and he been great dad to my toddler. Because I a have kid things kinda moved quickly. I had planned a picnic for our anniversary. I stayed up all night cramming for college so I could spend whole day with him. I started to make the sandwiches and we were both dressed up, when my boyfriend shouts "I think he's dead". We buried my fuzzy friend that day. i couldn't stop crying I just wanted to stay in at that point. I called my best friend because she lost her cat earlier in the year. on the phone my boyfriend got down on his knee shirtless and asked me to be his girlfriend. I just kinda gave him wtf face and said yea. The ring looked extremely expensive especially since he's broke. Later at night we saw a movie to get my mind off everything. I live with my mom and in her living room, shirtless and sweaty he gets down one knee again and proposes. I felt pressure to say yes since I didn't wanna break up. he told me he have redo because he didn't wanna be like my ex who proposed to me right after my grandfather died. So far redo never happened and I don't know if make it more ackward, but he goes around telling anyone bur still want is a a secret from our families. I really did like the ring and proposals aren't as important as the meaning, but I still feel disappointed. Because I'm a romantic whose never had romantic moment because my I'm mom all I do is work and school. And I haven't gone real date in 7 years. I just feel like feelings didn't matter, or he was to considered about doing that awful day.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Sometimes if you want something done right (the way YOU want it done) then you have to do it yourself. So here's a thought... why don't YOU go out and spend $3,000 on a ring for HIM and get down on YOUR knee? I'll but he would love it if you shirtless, too.

But seriously, women like you give all women a bad name. You are self-absorbed and your priorities are all messed up. Either accept him as he is and love him back, or cut him loose so he can find a better woman.

He's obviously not perfect, but clearly neither are you. You're a single mother, and at your age that's a big strike against you. And yet he accepts you as you are and loves your child. You are lucky to have him. Stop knit picking and start appreciating what you have, or just say good bye. But for fuck sake don't ask him for a redo. That's just not cool.

OlderAndWiser · Accepted Answer

What is it that you want from him? Is he THAT far off the mark?

loves2learn · Accepted Answer

Start by having your mom watch your kid 1-2 nights a month at least so you can have official date night with him. Give him some grace. Proposing is awkward. My brother in law handed my sister in law her ring on the way to a basketball game and asked if she wanted to wear it. They are happily married with 2 kids.
.
He cares. He is trying. Make space for you two to bring the romance back.

Jazquee · Accepted Answer

Imagine how nerve racking it is to propose to someone. Your putting your heart out on the line hoping that that person won't stomp on your heart...
So don't stomp on it. We dont live in Disney movies... it's romantic enough that he got on one knee. He loves you... loves your kid... has known you a long time. Seen you at worst.
Just love him back.

tatianamay · Answer

Ahh, the fact that he’s a good father to your toddler, his commitment to you, and the expensive ring he bought even though he was broke is not romantic enough? Please do not find fault in everything. Sure, you may have wanted the cliché romantic proposal, but he did buy an expensive ring for you. Think about it.

Yanifah · Answer

You're young and have unrealistic expectations. (You can thank romantic comedies for that.) If you want a redo that meets your standards, why not tell him what you envisioned? If you're expecting him to read your mind, you'll be sorely disappointed. Give him a chance to make that come true for you.

DarkCarousel · Answer

You don’t find it romantic that someone wants to commit to you for the rest of their life? That’s romantic enough.
If you truly love him, that should be enough. Not everyone is showy or grand gesture style. Though for him, that may have been a grand gesture.

Anonymous · Answer

Lol. A redo? You are young and, bluntly put, stupid. Asking your boyfriend to redo his proposal is akin to slapping him in the face. 6 to 8 out of 10 proposals are awkward and not at the right time either. It's Hollywood and celebrities with all the time in the world to do a few retakes before they publish a polished reversed proposal that makes them seem more than they are.

exitseven · Answer

I never really proposed to my wife. After the third date we both knew we were going to get married. I thought it was cool we had that kind of relationship but years later I feel bad I didn;t make a bigger deal about it.
We have had a great marriage for 25 years and sometimes I mention to my wife that I never really proposed and she always says that I have been showing her how much i love her for the ;last 2 years.

tallcuck · Answer

You sound like a user. I bet your first man seen it. This one doesn't seem to have much empathy. So he can't see that you are a user. Users don't deserve marriage. They use and abuse and discard or get discsrded for their abuse. I feel sorry for your child. Users bring up even worse beings than they are...

Poppykate · Answer

You need to break up with him. 🤔 Clearly, you aren’t feeling it. This man wants to spend the rest of his life with you. He brought you a ring and got down on one knee. If this was the right guy, this would be enough?

Midnight_Kiss · Answer

If you truly want to marry him and can see a future together, why does it matter how he proposed? You have a life time of memories ahead of you.

Ally247 · Answer

Just bring up casually how he said he’d redo it, and that you’re expecting it. Guys don’t tend to think about this stuff so don’t take it personally and just remind him, they just don’t realise how important romance is in a relationship.

mackiewishbone · Answer

Yes tell him and make sure you smear on very thick. Show him your true colors and let’s hope he sees them and runs

Mofunfour20 · Answer

Most guys want to start their own family not move into one that another man started. Its harsh but its the truth, you would be better off going back to your childs father. Godspeed

Anonymous · Answer

You are perfect and deserve nothing short of perfection. The fact that he loves you and is great with your kid means nothing. Dump him and find you a rich guy who's hopelessly romantic and doesn't mind dating single moms.

TheFlak38 · Answer

So it's not enough that you're a singe mom and belong to the streets, you still have men desperate to bang you and you're so ungrateful and take everything for granted and have the nerve to complain about him on top of everything.

JesseJayNeak · Answer

So, you purposely want to hurt his feelings because you didn't like his proposal? Wow, talk about petty

Overmind · Answer

Trust being the foundation of a relationship & communication a close second of course you should tell him.

Anonymous · Answer

‘not been on a real date in 7 years’ lol, not been on a real date whole life. Anyway, what GaG folks can do, talk to him and explain

Honesttguy · Answer

What's most romantic thing u did for him?

ItsMeItsMe1989 · Answer

really? Seriously? You're going to complain about, a proposal.. wow, just, wow This is why I stay single

Weasel1983 · Answer

We’re not perfect. We can’t always get something like that right but we can try to do the best we can

Mamaganja · Answer

Smh…. Not sure that it matters.

Iron_Man · Answer

Do what you have to do

Shihab91 · Answer

1yr is enough 🤷🏻‍♂️

jimmy2 · Answer

Damn that not cool at all

Anonymous · Answer

You dont deserve him.

CreamySeed · Answer

Too many words

I'm disappointed in my boyfriend's proposal, should I tell him?

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