Do you think you would ever say NO to a marriage proposal?

[coachTanthony]

[Guy13]

Declining a marriage proposal, I hope would never be a part of my life. This is something both people usually know that’s coming sometime in the near future too. I certainly would not be having a woman proposing to me or taking her last name as prescribed in the Feminist mentality.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

If more people were upfront about what they really want, it shouldn’t have to come to that… I’m not looking to get married, I would like to be married in two years time, etc… I want kids, I don’t want kids… these are conversations people should be having before anything gets THAT serious… But no it’s text a day, a week, jump into bed together and call that a relationship🤦🏼‍♀️

[Gibbons44]

Yeah, the younger ones are soul (or model of interaction) searching, and the older ones are not oroviding guidance but often introducing chaos, angish and disaster/suffering - and then blaming it on 'human nature'.
The young ones are ofter smart and good, but not quite confident enough to jump into such a conversation and have it properly and thoroughly, and they should.
I wouldn't refuse it, and know from past experiences that, providing it doesn't get loaded by selfishness, it feels wonderfully good to be on the mind of someone one fancies and getting close - it is the essence of feeling good (and mentally healthy/sane, that wellbeing state we're all looking for)

[Guardian45]

Well said!

[jennifer_bloom]

The chances are low cause if I do not view a guy’s personality as a desirable lover, I would not date him. I know people who married people they did not like because they thought some relationship with an unloving person was better then none, I think they made the biggest mistakes of their lives. Either I’m totally interested or not even a coffee date.

[zeitgeist057]

I have said no to more than one marriage proposal.

I am not really into marriage, and will likely say no to any future proposals as well.

[LovingLoverReturned]

I'd it because divorce can make you lose out? Or another reason?
It's likely because you nevwr met a woman you love enough. You think you are not into it- but only the right woman will make you into it

[zeitgeist057]

@LovingLoverReturned none of the above. I have many women I love dearly and enough to be committed to them for life, but it's more that I disagree with the principle of marriage itself. It is an antiquated, static contract for dynamic individuals. The history of it is gross, as girls sold to men or used as pawns to seal real estate and political deals. In my own life, I had divorced parents and then my divorced parents went and married new people, whom they also divorced. I have looked at marriage statistics and it's not pretty. About half end in divorce, and of the remaining half, half of those are unhappy. This shows me that marriage is not a natural or happy thing to engage in, with more 3 times more failure and misery statistically than success and happiness.

I'm quite happy to simply be committed and loving with women, without an archaic legal contract. I'd be fine with a ceremony to declare love, but the contract of marriage is not appealing.

[zeitgeist057]

Including the women who proposed marriage to me. I am in contact still with all three of them, and love them, but I don't want to be married to any of them.

[LovingLoverReturned]

Hmm I see why now. I still think if two people are to separate they will do it whether or not married... they just have no legal or thorough accounts for these non legal relationships.

Marriage has to be between two willing people... those who sell people aren't doing so because marriage says you can sell people. 🤔

[LovingLoverReturned]

But actually marriage originated as a spiritual thing wo if you aren't spiritual then this is most clear to me.

[LovingLoverReturned]

Clear to me as to why you don't want it.

[zeitgeist057]

@LovingLoverReturned interesting you believe the origin was spiritual. A quick Google search and the first half a dozen articles all agree it was not spiritual or romantic in origin.

www.livescience.com/37777-history-of-marriage.html
"What marriage had in common was that it really was not about the relationship between the man and the woman," said Stephanie Coontz, the author of "Marriage, a History: How Love Conquered Marriage," (Penguin Books, 2006). "It was a way of getting in-laws, of making alliances and expanding the family labor force."

https://www.brides.com/history-of-marriage-2300616

"The main goal of marriage, earlier on, was to act as an alliance between families. Throughout history, and even today, families arranged marriages for couples. Most couples didn't marry because they were in love, but for economic liaisons. "

theweek.com/articles/528746/origins-marriage

[AviatorTom]

When I was younger, I was going to propose to the girl I was dating, but changed my mind at the last minute. I guess that's the equivalent of declining a marriage proposal.

[LovingLoverReturned]

Unfortunately yes if there is misunderstanding or sometimes people are do distracted they can't hear... but if someone proposes to me it has to mean we have a serious relationship but I've been telling them "not as yet. We have to sort out this first". But I would tell them "yes but not as yet" ...

The only reason engaging for a long time may not be so good an idea is I don't want them to feel embarrassed or be asked awkward questions from family.

[electromagnetic]

I didn’t think I would but I did once.
I think getting the questioned popped really solidifies what we want in life. I really thought I’d spend my life with that particular person. But when I got asked, it was a moments pause for me to realize that lifestyle wasn’t what I wanted.

[Guardian45]

It's a hard choice, but good for you.

[Red-Blaze]

Yes, I make it pretty clear I dont look for that
I got too many of my own issues, and I dont want someone yo suffer from it, so not going to merry, if anyone offer it, they ask anyway they miss something or hope I say yes anyway.. I am honestly a little scared of someone trying something really stupid with it, like doing it in a big event and just placing me in a real panic becouse they miss the memo

[NathanDavis]

one sided proposals are not my thing...

if we had planned for it though... and then, they surprise me, but still an expected proposal that was oncoming... I would not a reason to decline

[Xoxocutekitty]

I have twice. Only both proposals weren't genuine (or official) just somebody saying stuff because they were desperate to stay in a relationship or apply for a visa.

[Finchie40]

I is once after I divorced my ex when I found out she was cheating on me , she tried getting me back and proposed to me , I laughed and said No fucking way

[Agape93]

Yeap, have once before. Marriage holds 0 appeal for me, they knew this and still did so. They lost a relationship for it.

[Ms_Facesitter]

Of course. If the timing isn't right, it isn't right. You can't pressure me into saying yes if I'm not feeling it.

[Guardian45]

Agreed

[SexyRedd1966]

I would say no because I don't want to get married again... I've already done it twice 😒

[Guardian45]

I hear you. I'm divorced once.

[mobiusforniner]

I was declined a proposal. She regretted it after I got married to someone else. Funny how that works

[John-E_63]

I'm a somewhat liberated guy who doesn't think it should be written in stone who's supposed to say it first. If I wasn't taking the initiative soon enough, then yes, I would accept a marriage proposal, but only from a woman, not another man, because I am straight, no offense to gay people, it's just the way I am, believe.

[marish01]

I will accept marriage proposal only once.

I will have only one sexual partner for this one life.

[Guardian45]

I admire your strength, but let opportunities pass you by. Be sure.

[Guardian45]

DON'T ***

[Nikki1989]

I said no twice to two different men before finally saying yes to my now husband.

[Guardian45]

May I ask why you said No?

[AddylynnNightingale]

Don't rush into it and don't do it in public. Meet these two conditions and I'll say yes.

[Anonymous]

if i wasn't ready then yeah i'd say no, but i'd like to think i would talk with my partner about marriage before a proposal pops out of nowhere

[Guardian45]

Agreed!

[CoolCatMar1]

If it's my boyfriend no, if it's someone else yea

[Anemone978]

Depends on if I was really ready for marriage or if I was seriously in love. If I had any doubts about it yes I would. I honestly don't know if I could do marriage again...

[Adam1978]

Most likely I would since I have no desire getting married. They would have no argument for me to say yes.

[andreasderjuengere]

I did so. But in a polite and somewhat humorous way :)

I would do it again. To marry nowadays has become a meaningless act of administration.

[NostalgiaSenpi]

The only way I would do that is if we haven't been dating for that long. Come to me with a marriage proposal in two weeks and I'm gone. This isn't Skyrim. You can't just wear an amulet of Mara. Now, if it's been a year or more, I'll do it.

[genericname85]

sure i would. i won't say yes just in order to "not ruin the moment". me giving my word means something. and i'm not gonna give it out of politeness if i don't mean it.

[TheVigilantFox]

The now ex wanted to marry me and have kids I ran a mile. No way would I marry into that toxic mess.

[Anonymous]

i’ve said no before.. when they’re just purposing because they think it would stop your fighting then it’s a big no.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

No, I can't say NO to a marriage proposal from a sweet Lady.

[es20490446e]

I will only be dating people I see myself marrying to.

[msc545]

Hell yes, I would say NO.

[coachTanthony]

I could of bet my house on that lol

[CuriousMufuxka]

I would have to think more about how to respectfully decline and then hopefully upped my cardio enough to RUN!

[Guardian45]

Ummm. I'm NOT proud to say this, but I have twice. First time was because she didn't want children. Second time was because it was too soon.

[MaryLeee]

Marriage proposal needs to be divided into occasions and people. Satisfaction of these hard conditions can make a decision.

[bamesjond0069]

Yes because women shouldn't ask men. Yuck. I'd say no out of principle. That's just humiliating all around.

[driven159]

I told my ex-wife that wanted. to marry me after just a month but put it off for 6 months so said no at the time waited made a delayed yes

[Anonymous]

I could see it happening under the right circumstances.

[Chazmatazz269]

“Would”? Absolutely!
‘Could’? Highly unlikely.

[artsy_dragon]

Nope, some please marry me 😭😂

[Guardian45]

Pardone?

[artsy_dragon]

I want some to marry me 😂

[Guardian45]

I see. You want someone to marry you

[artsy_dragon]

Yes!

[itsalyssaagain]

Yes and I have before.

[Guardian45]

May I ask why you said No?

[itsalyssaagain]

Not the right person

[Guardian45]

EXCELLENT reason! LOL!

[itsalyssaagain]

Haha. He just wasn’t the person I saw myself with forever

[Guardian45]

Best NOT to make THAT mistake!

[itsalyssaagain]

Yeah marriage is a bit commitment…I only wanna do it once.

[Jennz6]

I will say No

[Jennz6]

Unless I’m being asked to be a Concubine or a second wife especially if the first wife is bisexual

[PainusNdeeAnus]

Women shouldn’t propose.

[SecretsofKB]

Why not?

[PainusNdeeAnus]

@SecretsofKB because it’s desperate and pathetic

[PainusNdeeAnus]

@SecretsofKB sorry if that was harsh

[SecretsofKB]

@painusndeeanus It did come off harsh. Why is it pathetic and desperate?

[PainusNdeeAnus]

@SecretsofKB because men control access to relationships a woman getting down on one knee is the equivalent of a man getting on his knees and begging a woman for sex
( not very attractive is it? ) you and most women would most definitely say no to a man who thinks he can have access to your body simply by begging with no effort

You can’t beg to be a wife

[SecretsofKB]

@painusndeeanus and men getting down on one knee isn't begging to be a husband? This seems like a big double standard to me.

[PainusNdeeAnus]

@SecretsofKB yes it is a double standard and do you know why?

[SecretsofKB]

@painusndeeanus no but I'm sure you're going to tell me.

[PainusNdeeAnus]

@SecretsofKB because that’s the way it is.

[SecretsofKB]

@painusndeeanus Such a well thought out answer

[PainusNdeeAnus]

@SecretsofKB well it’s a gist and a simplified version of the answer

You make double standards sound like a bad thing only when they don’t benefit women

Double standards are unfair but they’re also the means by which we conduct ourselves socially

[Random_g]

I have already.. 2 times actually.

[Guardian45]

May I ask why you said No?

[Random_g]

@Guardian45 well first of all I'm a Muslim so our way of proposal isn't the Hollywood way.. it goes like this in our community , a man get interested in a woman , he propose , if she is interested she accept, they get engaged, that period of engagement they get to know each others to see if they are the ones for each others, then they get married or end the engagement.

So the first one who propose to me , I was still studying and I didn't feel like I'm ready to start a relationship to begin with so I refused..
The second one I accepted the proposal, but then when I start talking to him, he was a really nice man, respected, educated, rich... But I realized that there was certain things I can't tolerate in him as my life partner so I ended it.

[Guardian45]

Sounds logical

[Random_g]

Yep.. You end up with the least damage possible, no trauma and drama needed... It either work out or don't.

[LovingJo]

Depends who asked, why and how 😂🙄

[tina_695]

I have said it so many times already

[Guardian45]

May I ask why you said No?

[melanieeeB]

Probably haha

[Guardian45]

Why?

[loveslongnails]

Absolutely, coach.

[Pete671]

Depends who it's from,,,

[Sasha0426]

If I truly wanted marriage, probably not.

[Mimi_loves_her]

Tbh probably

[KrakenAttackin]

I would never say "yes" to a marriage demand.

[legalboxers]

No. I be honored and privileged

[Anonymous]

Yes. But she can still ask. 😆😆😆

[Anonymous]

I said no, twice, two different guys

[Guardian45]

May I ask why you said No?

[Opinion Owner]

They’re unfaithful, always out partying, wanting to get married simply to make things better for us. Never was it genuine love for the sake of being happy. It’s always a root reason to keep the peace so I would accept their poor life choices and behaviors. No thanks -

[Guardian45]

I admire your decisions

[Anonymous]

I said no twice

[boobliker]

yes!!!

[BarryLiverstone]

I have said no

[In_Trance]

Absolutely