If a husband’s subservience to his wife is considered an act of love, then when a wife is subservient to her husband, it should be seen as…?

[SolitarySolace]

Oppression

Love

Updates

9 mo

Notice how when women submit, it’s only considered love if they freely choose it — otherwise it’s oppression. But when men submit through providing/protecting, it’s automatically called love, even if they’re pressured by cultural expectations. That’s the definition of a double standard.

Updates

9 mo

Some women need to learn that men’s roles are obligations enforced by society itself (laws) while women’s roles are choices

[Lliam]

Neither should be subservient. They should work together as a team to insure that they are both happy and fulfilled.
I won't be bossed around and I doubt if anyone else wants to be. That would be pathetic. I sure don't boss my wife, but she doesn't boss me, either.

[PretzelBeanie]

I don't think subservience is an act of love. I think service can be an act of love, like cleaning the dishes or fixing the sink, but subservience is not even really an act, it is a relationship dynamic. And I don't think that dynamic is healthy—unless it is like a kink where both people are into it and able to stop if they choose.

[SolitarySolace]

So men shouldn’t be obligated to their roles? Which are enforced by law and societal expectations? It should be a choice just like women’s roles?

[PretzelBeanie]

I understand societal expectations can put you into unfair roles, but what roles do you mean that are enforced by law? The only one I can think of is the draft forcing men to be protectors, which I hope will continue to change worldwide as more countries start to include women.

[SolitarySolace]

The draft is one example, but beyond that, family courts, alimony, and child support laws overwhelmingly obligate men to provide, while women aren’t held to the same standard. Combine that with cultural expectations that men must protect, provide, and sacrifice or risk being discarded, and you see the imbalance clearly. Women’s roles remain optional—men’s remain mandatory. That’s all I’ll say on this. I am an author and I need to focus on writing my next book.

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

Just depends. If she is forced to do it against her will then it's oppression. If she willing wants to do it then I guess you can consider it love.

[SolitarySolace]

Double standard

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

How so?

[SolitarySolace]

Because when a husband provides and protects, it’s automatically called love — even if he feels pressured or forced by cultural expectations. But when a wife submits, it’s only love if she chooses it freely, otherwise it’s called oppression. That’s two different standards for the exact same dynamic.

I’m not going to bother getting into a back and forth with you on this.

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

If you don't want to debate it, that's fine. Your stance is incorrect though. If he feels forced to, no matter the source then that's oppression as well.