The Futility of the Clap Back

pavlove

The Futility of the Clap Back


For those of you who don't know it, I'm sure most do, to clap back at someone is simply return fire when someone disses you in some way.


I've seen it mostly in myself, but since taking a break from it, I've seen it for the prision which it is. The need to get into a one-up match with anyone who comes at you wrong can only be good when you're both just trying to be funny, but when feelings are involved often your ego is punishing you and ruining your day even when the person you're going back and forth with isn't particularly witty or sharp.


For one, the ego is an externally located sense of value which is manifested in the opinions others have of you or how you view they should value you based on society's standards and norms. For instance an NFL player might have a big ego even if women think he's terrible to be around and so he thinks they SHOULD fall over him even though it doesn't match his reality. Similarly, when you're arguing with someone because your ego is telling you you need to shut them down THEIR opinions actually do matter because your ego is taking all references and building around it. You need them to think you're smarter than them or whatever it is you're arguing about and if you're unable to convince them of that or the people around you hearing it then your ego punishes you and forces you to keep going against your will.



The Futility of the Clap Back



Another thing, you look weak and stupid. Everyone knows the person most bothered is the person losing the argument even if that same person is making all the right points. This is because of the position you're taking doesn't match the status you actually bring. Think of Rihanna jumping on some random country black girl and calling her ugly just because the girl tweeted that Rihanna shouldn't have made a song with Chris Brown after he beat her. Rihanna being who she is just looks cruel to have called some random no one ugly. Not only that but this girl got thousands of followers in a day because of Rihanna. Not only did she look stupid next to a no one she elevated that no one to someone if only temporarily. If you look around you'll notice it's often very talented, successful people who develop these big egos around their success in whatever area that are so easily manipulated to "clap back" at the smaller little crtique or insult while people who do relatively nothing exceptional are cool and chillin.



The Futility of the Clap Back



Finally, everyone gets hated on and everyone gets critiqued. It's actually a good thing. If you're not a part of the conversation then you're not even in the game. You haven't even pentrated anyone's lives. It's unfortunate that that often means you have to hear and read bad things about yourself but it's good because it's giving people a platform to speak. People just want to speak on something and they want the right to say they don't like something. This is not just on the internet but in person too. Whenever you step up, and I'm not talking about alpha male or even males exclusvively, but whenever anyone steps up and is like this is me this is what i believe blah blah there will always be someone ready to throw shade at you. So as painful as it is...say someone randomly walks up to you or writes to you publicly "hey I hate you i wish you would just shut up all your stuff is stupid" you just smile and say great and move on to the next thing in your life. You're not a punk for doing this, you just haven't allowed this person to penetrate your life at all. It's something you do for you in order to black out negativity not so you can "look like you don't care and are in control." that's another trick of the ego where you can then be like look at me I don't care what this or that guy thinks and then you're waiting for people to give you props for not caring thus defeating the purpose. Just say great move on. There's no reward in the Clap Back

The Futility of the Clap Back
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