Having a Mental Illness is rarely ever “pretty”. We get judged for being different. We have a hard time confessing certain symptoms we’re struggling with to our support system. It is even harder to talk about it to those who never struggled themselves.
The sad part is that most people see those who suffer from a Mental Illness as those who are just looking for attention, or who just always feel sorry for themselves. That is not the case. We have different ways of thinking than the person not suffering from it, we see everything different. Some days we feel great and then other days we can’t even seem to leave the bed.
Some of us think about death 24/7 without being suicidal, most are suicidal, people always can’t seem to understand. If you self-harm you are seeking attention.
Some days are harder than other, you just can’t seem to do anything. You are so tired.
There is a lack of motivation and people always just think you are lazy. There is so much more than just that.
Our good days aren’t always the good day other people know, if we can get out of bed and get through the day, well mostly that is a good day for us.
We get upset about anything, people always say that it’s nothing to be upset about or to cry about, to worry about. They DON’T know what it is like to live in this kind of fear. It is hard to explain something like this when they can’t walk in your shoes.
People tell us to smile and be thankful for what we have, because there are people out there having it worse than us. How would you know what we feel?
“It’s all in your head” a lot of us heard that one before. “Just get your mind set right”, “Try to be more positive”. How on earth can I do that when I am already down in the dumps? We can’t just snap out of it!
You can have a Mental Illness and still be a normal functioning human being, but be fighting a constant battle inside yourself. Negativity, frustration and fear all rule inside your inner thoughts. Feeling like you’re not good enough, yet you know you are. Feeling like you’re not doing enough, yet you’re doing too much. It’s a constant battle inside of yourself.
I just wish more people had an understanding about what mental illness is and that it has many faces. To have that understanding that what you see on the outside is most of the time not the same as what we are facing on the inside.
It would be wonderful to have a great support system, for people to stop judging us, to stand by us. And if you have nothing good to say about it, then why don’t you just say nothing at all? And if you ever were to be diagnosed with some sort of Mental Illness, I just hope that there will be people supporting you, because then you will know that it is not easy.
Wow. That is totally 100% true. As I was reading that I could hear words that were said to me many times last year in not a very nice or understanding way. But more so just yelled at me By my stepmother (who has been a mother more or less since I was about 5.). And has known I have manic depression for a long time. and a while after my separation from my wife. My stepmother came to pay me a visit. And I heard getting yelled at me was exactly that. "Wot do u do. Lay around all day feeling sorry for urself." "Snap out of it". "Do u just think to urself oh poor me". "Where's the happy easy going person we know u can be". "This has been going on for years. Just snap out of it". "No one feels sorry for u." And pretty well every other quote from ur take was yelled at me. When I first told them I have depression roughly about 15 years ago I was told the same then. "It's all in ur head snap out of it". "There's far worse off people". (Honest truth). So after that visit I received last year they (father and stepmother and my sisters) no longer wish to speak to me until I "snap out of it". That was the best my take I've read. And I really just wish I could sent it to them. Anonymously.
For an empath, I can be mad at some people who always play the victim being dramatic not doing anything about it as they tell me to mind my own business but they keep reminding me how fucked up their business is... But I let them understand and I can be honest even though it's harsh for them to know for their own good. I just can't take actions for them because their online friends. And even if this is real life, I don't wanna be called creepy. I can be doubtful if they get offended, giving me a bad name and not trying to understand. I would try to leave them alone but I still feel like an ass. But living with a mental illness sucks and I know how it feels. I just escaped it. Being an empath is not easy too.. Feelings sucks.
I hate the victimuzation and pity associated with it. A lot of people with depression, anxiety etc, are quick to bring up those conditions just to get attention for themselves.
I have a diagnosed mental disability that requires me to follow a very strict schedule and do extra to keep basic tasks in order.
Which is why I do not get the pity party thing when bringing it up.
I am very embarassed of my condition, so it has always been strange to me when others who say they suffer from them almost brag or use them as an excuse.
"I cussed at my mom because Im bi-polar."
" I missed work again because Im depressed."
Bullshit.
You cussed at your mother because you failed to manage your condition.
You missed work again because you failed to manage your condition.
I hate that so much. you're a person, not a disability, so get your shit together.
What a load of crap. Telling someone that it's their fault they missed work because of a mental illness is like blaming someone for missing work because they have cancer.
there's therapy specifically for managing a full time job according to your condition.
people with fucking cancer work.
Now of course if you have medical appts thats totally different.
But continuously calling off work because your depression killed your motivation is treatable - hence all the research geared to helping depressants overcome those difficulties.
The point of having a mental disability is to learn to live NORMAL with it, not using it as a crutch or excuse, or life will be shit.
Thats why patients who try really hard, get the best of their condition over patients who let their condition always bully them.
I have lost many jobs due to my conditions for the same reason, and now have a great job that is more demanding, but my therapy helped me get a hold of my disability.
You have to fucking try, not cry.
Cancer patients fight their disease and TRY to maintain a regular life.
I fight like hell against my _treatment_resistant_ bipolar, which is why I've been able to have a successful career as an actuary. When I'm to sick to go into work, I work from home. Nevertheless, there are times such as now when I simply too sick to work. Your inability to understand that makes me think that you've never actually been that sick.
It's indescribable on how I feel when people ask and it's shitty. I'm just glad I have supportive friends or else I probably wouldn't be sane by now. For the self harm part I disagree. I don't think self harm is always done for attention because I use to do it and I didn't do it for attention and I did it area's you most likely wouldn't see the scars or cuts. I did it one day and then after that it became an addiction really rather than me trying to get attention especially when I kept them covered and told no one about it.
I actually agree a lot with dancing with nebulas, and I know this is an olderish post but I thought it would be interesting to put a short comment on it anyways. Like trust me I know, mental illness sucks. I've had one of the more worst and life threatening ones and well and I have never let it define me. If you do that, I think you know that it will become you and you let it win. I've also been born with other mental illnesses as well, I take medication for two of them. Its kind of just like a shoulder shrug at this point in my life. I've recovered almost successfully from my anorexia and my adhd is managed by medication since I was 5. And my OCD is always going to be there and medication doesn't fix everything but I learn to deal with it. I was never bullied for my mental disorders because nobody ever knew about them and I was good at hiding them and had amazing social skills. Its all in how you deal with your own problems, I never had anyone pity me, my one father used to even make fun of my adhd and times and I would just ignore it because thats how people are. Nobody is going to understand and you shouldn't expect them to. You have an imbalance in your brain and you have to realize it for what it is, instead of wallowing in pity over it. Not everybody does, but some people just don't know how to deal with it, but if you just get help from the right sources and learn the science behind them you will understand.
Tbh i have a lot of mental health problems and honstly most people with mental health do want attention that's why they always bring it up and even i want attention for mine but there is nothing wrong with this. And most of the time we want attention cause we hope some one will give us it and make us feel better. Or there are people who don't want that at all. But quite a bit of people with metal health do metion it a lot just to get attention i know this cause i do it but it don't mean my problems aren't bad cause they really still are.
I find that the problem with this is that the loudest people who talk about mental health are just doing it for attention. Unfortunately that paints a bad picture for everyone.
I understand where your coming from though I find it hard to explain how just because I'm not acting down or depressed doesn't mean I'm not feeling it, I'm just trying to get myself through the day.
Here's a funny feeling I had a few days I actually laughed, as in out loud and genuinely! Now that might seem to others like that's a little thing but its the first time in years I've done that and that was a big achievement to me.
I have PTSD, Anxiety, Depression, and Social Anxiety. People don't realize mental illness is a big deal until it happens to them. Not everyone is educated in mental illness because they think they can tell others to pick yourself up and get over it will be the cure. I don't have many friends at all because they treated me very different and didn't care to understand the struggles. I had to learn to understand that the people who go through what you are battling are the only ones who understand it seems.
What I hate is when people you know are supportive if something happens or if I say something a particular way without realizing it. They will defend me, but when it occurs to them they seem to forget I have these issues and they completely blame me and get angry at me.
I suffer from several things including mood and anxiety disorder, pervasive developmental disorder, auditory processing disorder and tourettes among a few other things. I can't even hold down a job. And im not good with retaining friendships but I desperately want friends, i do have a few but we don't hang out enough.
I feel the same way about my social anxiety. Sometimes certain situations are really overwhelming and people just tell me to be 'fearless' or 'strong.' They don't realize how physically and mentally exhausting it is to be so anxious around people. There are certain triggers that can set me off that don't make sense to anyone else and it really frustrates me. They also don't understand why some days I'm perfectly outgoing and friendly, and other days I'm a bit more withdrawn in my own shell. I try to be the person I know I can be, but I get stuck in my own head a lot and always worry about making a good first impression. Sometimes I wish I could hang a sign over my head that says "I have social anxiety" so people would be more understanding & have an idea of why I'm acting a certain why. I really liked your piece :)
I have misophonia. I really fucking hate it when someone doesn´t take it seriously. ´´you´re acting up because you hear a certain sound? ridiculous". Ofcourse it sounds ridiculous, i find so too. Doesn't matter how dumb it sounds; it's real and i have it. I had panic attacks while crying my eyes out because i heard a certain sound four times. I understand if you don't know all my triggers. But i you make one of 'em please don't make them again because you don't care or you think it's funny
@Jayjoy i don't know if i have it but the sound of someone eating chewing or even breathing loudly is very irritating and annoying i even have to leave or put headphones on
how many times have i been told depression is only because of my attitude and that its my fault im not happy and that if i went outside and did things it would get better. it doesn't work that way. i lost 17 pounds this spring because spring time is when my depression gets the worst and i dont eat. sometimes even the most vibrant sunny days just seem dull. the thoughts of death without being suicidal thing is spot on 100%. its been something I've had since i was a little kid now i just know the words to describe it. then for me it rotates between feeling empty, feeling numb, and then feeling fine. its really not fun and people who dont go through it dont understand. luckily for the times when things got really bad my best friends were there and i love them with all my heart for keeping me from doing it. its been a year since then and i have not wanted to do it since.
My whole family have anxiety which comes from my Great Grandmother, it can be genetic. But the thing is, it isn't a crutch. Just because I have anxiety doesn't mean I will ever let it run my life. Sure I'm tired, and yea it has affected relationships before I knew how to cope. But now that I do, it's just a part of my life
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There needs to be more support for people dealing with people living with a mental illness.
Being told "be understanding" is as useless as "snap out of it" because it doesn't include any information of what you are supposed to be understanding about, and what the best way to deal with it is.
What are you supposed to say, for example, after days, weeks, or even years of tidying up after someone who won't pick up anything they don't want to and think nothing of living surrounded by piles of moldy food? Someone who can be kept happy and positive only by carrying out their every wish at the expense of your whole life.
Thanks for sharing. Yes, it was always difficult for me to understand, was judging from the not-mentally-ill point of view. Would be good to know more details and how actually others can help.
Beautifully Done, hun. Some in my Own family have Anxiety and Depression and Have Had to go See a Therapist for this and some very good Meds, Which Has Gotten them Back on Track. xx
Of course I wouldn't expect people with mental illness to know what it really is (let alone people who never experienced it), rather, they know the effects of it, and I sympathize with them.
The Intellect: - By convention there is sweetness, by convention bitterness, by convention color, in reality only atoms and the void. The senses: - Foolish intellect! Do you seek to overthrow us, while it is from us that you take your evidence?
you certainly do not speak for me. I do not mind to be overthrown with what you call foolish intellect. We have the right to listen also if we want it so it is not a law that can forbid us. Some indeed will not want to listen. I think it is too confronting for too many still psychological because of their sensitivities. I think we should take all people seriously. And never treat people as crazy or as if they do not know what they are doing or saying because they are stupid or dumb. All people have their intellect. Trauma's, for example, do not fall under the category of just imagination of hallucination. They can be real. And tell me why would somebody imagination a trauma or pretend as if while it is or would not be true?
i know how things are. I just never impress. I wait for right ears and recognise them and that is all I am interesting in. The rest you should familiar with.
Good take but I missed the part where you try to explain the feeling to people who don't suffer from it and what people can do to help or at least try.
Cause you can never truly explain the feeling to people who never experienced it. Sometimes all a person with mental illness wants is just someone to be there, someone to listen and not judge. We also don't always want advice, just someone to be there
you just need someone to tell you its normal to feel that way, that others go through the same thing, its just a hard part of life that you are experiencing and once you've got past that it becomes better.
@JenSCDC i didn't say its normal to be mentally ill ;D im trying to convey that you aren't alone because everyone else experiences the same things, tiredness, depression, suicidal thoughts, at some point in their life. You just have to pull out of it, sometimes it takes another person to tell you of your bright future, that in a few years your life will change as long as you believe in yourself. The idea that you're mentally ill is like a chronic disease, completely negative. you're not trying to change your life, instead you're just giving up on making yourself better. All it requires is to remove the bad in your life and focus on enjoying life.
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