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What I've Learned From Caring About What Other People Think

Caring about what other people think about you is almost never a good thing. However, in this MyTake I am going to share with you what it`s like to view it from a different perspective; almost making it a good thing at times. I know that a lot of you have struggled with the same thing, and hopefully, you don`t feel so ashamed about it after reading this. Here are a few things I`ve learned from caring what other people think about me!

Okay, so firstly, let me make something clear. Through my ENTIRE STAY on this earth, I`ve dealt with the questions: "Oh, no, how will this make me look? WHAT WILL THEY THINK OF ME!?", and let me be honest. It`s not fun. Everything you do, say, think, mean... it will be reconsidered at least a hundred times.

Today, I feel great about myself because I`ve learned to stand up for what I believe.

Caring what other people think can never be fully avoided. You just learn to deal with it.

Negatives

1. People kept telling me "stop being so insecure".

Yup, I`m insecure! Thanks for reminding me! This especially was a big problem for me. I didn`t share my feelings with people often, but when I did, this was what I heard. Every. Fucking. Time.

What I've Learned From Caring About What Other People Think

2. I became excessively self- conscious.

Everyone should be A LITTLE self- conscious. It`s healthy because it means you care about how you present yourself. However, people like me, become excessively self-conscious. I`d notice straight away when I would say something "wrong" in a conversation. Something that I feared could make the person think "what the actual fuck" (most of the time they never thought that).

What I've Learned From Caring About What Other People Think

3. A lot of the things I did was for other people or/and their attention.

Places I went, people I spoke to and befriended... you name it. I usually had some kind of point I needed to prove. I wanted to prove things like: I`m social, cool, active... Basically, you could say I had an agenda for all the things I did.

4. I felt exhausted all the time, and I never really knew why.

I could come home from school one day and feel completely drained for no clear reason. When I`d think about it, all the things I tried to prove that day to people who didn`t even appreciate it, were the exact reason, and it was a VALID reason. It`s like people kept pulling my string as a Chatty- Cathy Doll because they thought it was entertaining how I tried (and failed) to make them laugh.

What I've Learned From Caring About What Other People Think

5. I attracted some really toxic relationships.

...both when it came to friends and romance. I just wanted to make my friends happy, but I forgot to please myself during the hard times. I put myself aside completely, which did some pretty good damage to others and my well being.

6. People took advantage of my kindness.

This braids in with point #5 because toxic people love stability. I come from a stable family and I`ve enjoyed sharing love and interests with others. However, it has bit my ass on numerous occasions. Sometimes I found myself to be too nice, and I just ended up giving in to everyone.

What I've Learned From Caring About What Other People Think

Positives (...yep!)

1. I encouraged myself to be the best I could be

This helped me learned a valuable lesson in life. A lot of people live great and careless lives without having to consider other people`s opinions, but it helped me to understand that it`s important to see other people`s examples, learn from them and try my best to be the greatest version of myself. Yes, the process was exhausting and perhaps unnecessary to an extent. Still, I value the times I tried to be my best and proved my worth.

What I've Learned From Caring About What Other People Think

2. It made me appreciate my intended good nature

So, no matter how screwed up it seems, people who care what others think have a pretty good nature. They live by making other people happy (that`s at least what they intend to do, sometimes it ends terribly). Through all the hard times whilst pleasing others, I learned in the process that my intentions are good, and I`m only trying my best.

What I've Learned From Caring About What Other People Think

3. I learned significant life lessons early

Things like: "You have to make yourself happy too", is a regular quote shared amongst parents. This is because a lot of parents forget themselves while they have children. Of course, this is normal, but not necessarily healthy. My own mother dedicated her life staying at home, raising my brothers and me, but I noticed from a young age that she missed the times she could be out and shine the way she used to. It is possible to do this while you have kids (now my mother has a kickass job and she`s shining like never before! She`s still the best mom ever!).

So, what I`m saying is, I`ve learned that it`s important to consider yourself in any situation. NEVER forget who you are. If you forget who you are as an individual person while having kids, you shouldn`t really have kids, to begin with (the kid thing is just an example, don`t get too caught up in it). You should be allowed to keep your individuality and shine while caring for others.

What I've Learned From Caring About What Other People Think

4. Since I cared what other people think, I appreciate other people who do the same thing

I know how hard it is to try getting out of this difficult situation. Not a lot of people understand. It`s just how it is. Since I am no longer a hardcore people-pleaser anymore, I can value other people who are going through what I did. I know that they need time and understanding, not to mention a little extra love. Instead of calling them insecure, be inspired by them for at least trying.

People who care so much what other people think, don`t feel valued. That`s why they seek such great acceptance from others.

5. Finally feeling that what you do shouldn` t please the rest of the world, is THE BEST FEELING.

Once you get over that phase of pleasing others, you REALLY feel that freedom. You also feel like you`ve earned it. After all that hard work, anxiety and pressure, you feel free. And you`ll go on in life rocking that freedom.

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Sorry if this came out as cheesy or irrelevant. I hope you guys enjoyed regardless! x

What I've Learned From Caring About What Other People Think
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Most Helpful Guy

  • sp33d

    'Caring what other people think can never be fully avoided. You just learn to deal with it.'
    No. I can avoid it whenever I want to. It doesn't mean I am careless or senseless. I don't need to gauge myself next to someone else.

    It's good you have come to terms with some challenges.

    'A lot of people live great and careless lives without having to consider other people`s opinions'

    This sounds so desperate. You immediately assume their lives are great because of.. reasons. It's definitely not the case someone doesn't consider anybody's opinion. They're considered, alright. Rather, it's not significant for that person.

    Once you have your priorities in life in order, you'll know what is important. The reality is, you won't have energy or time (nor should you) to think and care about what everybody else thinks of you.

    Is this still revelant?

Most Helpful Girl

  • Letitgoogoo

    Love this take!

    Is this still revelant?

What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Lance1965

    You can learn a lot about yourself by listening to what other people think about you but it can also do more harm than good. It all depends on the person saying it and what is that they are saying. One person's opinion is not always the right one but it can be a good learning experience.

    • sp33d

      Constructive criticism should always be welcome. The trouble with late teens is ego, they often can't accept it.

  • I personally think its good to care what people think, but approach it like a professional setting, turn even the most negative comments or annoying ones, into constructive criticisms you feel you need to hear, I've also learned, to relax and not try So hard for other people, but myself, because what do I have to prove to others, if I prove it to myself, that is how you become secure where you're at in life, THEN you can turn it into growth and positivity, Change needs a solid base, and that is how you gain a solid base, by forming facts about yourself and acknowledging the things you want to change, can change.

  • Skali9119Liska

    The only take I really enjoyed 🙂

  • sexcrazed123

    great My Take

  • Iron_Man

    Nice Take

  • Anonymous

    Nice take

  • Anonymous

    I bet you judge guys based on how tall they are and you expect sympathy. fucking sick.

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