Oh I got it! Are you persian?
Anyway, you have a gorgeous smile :) Your profile picture is adorable and genuine. It seems as if you just saw your crush and you can't control your smile haha. But I like the second one better - it's laid-back and but it seems a bit strained. I guess it's because you were trying to take a selfie and smile at the same time. I think if the ends of your lips were curved more upwards, then your smile would have looked more natural and would have reached your eyes.
Exercise your cheek muscles and dilate your pupils by relaxing your eyes and opening your eyes wider. Or smile with your mouth close lol.
I never smile for pics as I don't think I have a nice smile. My avi on here is a rare pic of me smiling and I only posted it for Canada day yesterday as a shoutout with my Tim Hortons lol. Other than that I don't show my teeth and maybe only give a half smile. You on the other hand have a very nice smile, both pics, there's nothing wrong with it! Keep smiling!!!
Tim Hortons is awesome! :D My favorite place to go when I went to Canada. XD
The one with less gum definitely looks better but the thing about your profile pic is that you have a really bright, genuine, and sweet smile. When I looked at your profile, it made me smile. Although the less gum the better, your bright, cheerful smile shall have to win.
You have a good smile.
As I'm sure you know women like pics of men looking thoughtfully into the distance best. But in person if you smile at them they like it.
Gums aren't that big a deal. Smile looks good and you have awesome teeth which is what if anything they'd notice.
I don't normally notice teeth but damn man nice teeth ;).
Nobody's gonna notice if there's a little gum or not.
You remind me a little of Joey from the show Friends, but not as dumb looking. Wish I had your looks.
Sure they do. Don't get me wrong, personality is huge, but you got good enough looks where the right personality means the sky is the limit.
My friend is 5'8 and looks like you, he gets women out of the woodwork. He's got charm, he's ballsy, and is the eternal optimist. Women love him. Me on the other hand, I don't do bad, but there are definitely women that I'm dead on arrival with and I'm a 5'10. As long as you're taller than them, they don't really give a shit. Looks get you in the door, personality gets you to home plate.
It's got to be what you're doing, if you're not laughing and smiling often, women are going to find you either off putting or creepy, especially if you have an angry/upset looking resting face. People really are attracted to those that look like they are just happy to be alive. Something instinctive makes them want to see what's got that person so happy.
MAAAAAAYBE that has something to do with it... just maybe...
1. Smile randomly 2. You thinking you'll creep them out is the type of behavior that probably makes them uncomfortable. If you just stopped worrying about whether you were creeping them out and just genuinely have a good time in the moment, whether they like you or not, they actually end up liking you a lot more.
Women aren't attracted to nervousness and avoidance. Got nothing to do with your looks or height. The type of behavior you just mentioned is the kind of thing that makes people uneasy because they can tell you're uneasy.
Right, which people can pick up on. The behavior is uneasy, whether you feel that way or not, that's how it gets interpreted. But hey man, you're your own biggest enemy here. You keep standing in your own way. You care too much about what they think and assume they will reject you.
Rejection isn't so bad, plus it has the added benefit of coming with success from time to time, which definitely makes it worth it. Reminds me of a quote: "It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might has well not have lived at all, in which case you have failed by default." You might as well approach them take a chance, because if you don't, the end result is like you got rejected by default. Might as well increase your odds some by throwing caution to the wind and not worry so much about other people. They aren't living your life, you are.
ehh Id rather just go on living my life doing the things I enjoy, will the lack of a lovelife bring me down occasionally? sure, but thats just something I have to deal with just as other people have to deal with other things
If I saw the chance of success amongst the rejection and failure then trust me I would go for it no doubt, but I dont, all I can see is just rejection after rejection waiting to happen
Well you know, all the neurostudies show, brainscan after brainscan has gone to find that all types of thinking is reinforced. In people with depression, ocd, etc. if you think it, it will be reinforced. If you keep thinking things will go bad and rejection is inevitable, it's only going to get more and more extreme. Maybe you are okay with that kind of negative thinking, and if so, keep doing you. But I don't buy that, I think you want more. Problem is, you have to work for it actively. You have to think the opposite even when it's not true, and little by little, your thoughts start to turn positive. Positive thoughts are much more likely to lead to positive results.
But I'm just here to throw it out there. You do what you will.
You can, but won't. There's a difference. It's a choice. Good luck with everything else though.
Wouldn't happen, that part is just in your head. If you approach somebody and just say "Hey, how's it going?" Nobody is going to think you're a creep. I've done it tons of times and worst thing that ever happened was a one word response follow by her going back to what she was doing, so I didn't say anything more. I'm not saying walk up to a woman and go "HI! I LIKE YOUR FACE!!! DATE ME!!!" Just talk to them like you would any other person and if you feel like they seem cool, ask them to grab some coffee sometime.
lol I have done that exact approach and had it work multiple times- and I'm not even good looking. Women aren't dumb. You spark up a conversation and they don't blow you off, if you have the confidence to realize "If they didn't like me at least a LITTLE, they would have blown me off... but they didn't, so if they seem cool, I'm making a move". You ask her out for coffee and if she's single, you have good odds. If she's not single, it's rare she hasn't brought it up by that point casually. Women do that constantly. If you casually chat up a girl, at some point during the conversation she'll say something like "Oh yeah, my boyfriend loves*whatever*". It's her way of politely letting you know "Nah, I'm not available" without embarrassing you. If she's not single and it didn't come up, I have on occasion gotten "Aw, that's really sweet, but I'm in a relationship."
So I know for a fact, these women aren't dumb. You take that approach and they know what you're hinting at.
"Most they'll want to be is friends and thats it" that's not true though. You ASSUME that's what they'll want and you put yourself there preemptively.
It's really not. It's really simple and easy. Talk to person, have a conversation, if the conversation is going well, ask out to coffee. The only way you get better at this is with practice. If you refuse even the simplest of approaches, you'll never get any practice at talking to women you don't know.
Will it work 100% of the time? Not at all. Will it fail more often when you're first doing it? Yeah, maybe, since you will probably be nervous and afraid of being embarrassed. That passes pretty quick. Then you just work on your conversation game until you get pretty good at keeping a conversation flowing. Then once you feel comfortable with that, you see how certain little flirty things work.
It's a slow learning process, but it works. I'm telling you. Know when to approach people though. Don't approach somebody that looks preoccupied. They are busy. Don't approach people who look like they are trying to get somewhere, they have somewhere to be.
And if you think a woman has never been interested, you are obviously. Even if you said nothing at all, I can tell by your looks alone, women have been interested. Maybe not like an insane amount or anything, but they have. You were just too busy keeping your head down and trying not to be noticed to be aware of your surroundings and pick up on the VERY subtle signals women put out to show their interest. There are women out there right now that have probably felt like YOU rejected THEM because you ignored the signals they were trying to send your way.
You're trying so hard to tell yourself why they won't accept you. Why not live one week of your life asking yourself "Why not?" instead of "Why?" Why not talk to her? Why not ask if she wants to grab coffee at the end of the conversation? Nobody is going to think you're creepy, that's a cop out. You might have convinced yourself these excuses are what will happen, but from an outsiders perspective who can see things objectively, they are just excuses to guard yourself from rejection. I get it, but let's not pretend this isn't a choice on your part. It is. It's not you can't, you choose not to. It didn't happen to you, this is what you're opting for. Which is fine, but I don't think that's what you really want, and I just want you to entertain that notion. Entertain the possibility that these things you've convinced yourself of, aren't set in stone truths.
Again, that's just not true. You're not even 25. I started turning my entirely LIFE around at 22, not just romantically but in general. I was an entirely different person. It's never too late to change. Never. You have to get out of the mindset that life is something that happens to you. It's your choices, YOU live it. How it goes, you play a large hand in like it or not. You CAN change. You're making a choice. It's okay to fail at things and be the one responsible for it. Life doesn't end with that, I can assure you. I have been through hell and back, seen friends die, be irrevocably changed from things they have seen in wars, I've seen people I respect fall to pieces. I've known what it's like to lose a home you've grown up in, to have no sense of direction. But most importantly, I know what it's like to look past all that and realize that despite living 22 years of failures and disappointments, I can change. And I did. And you can. But you have to choose it.
That's what you wish to believe, but that isn't what is true. The answer is always no because you don't want to do the essential component to success- trying.
Like I said, you can choose to believe that, but that doesn't make it true. If I can get dates, you can. That simple.
It's your attitude, that's all. That's literally the only thing holding you back. I don't know how you think the rest of us get dates, but we have to TRY. We aren't brad pitt and channing tatum types. They don't fall into our lap. We try. If you want a date, try. Simple. No excuses.
me: https://oi62.tinypic.com/f1irk5.jpg
Women I have gone out with recently (at least the ones I still talk to):
https://oi59.tinypic.com/11l3qle.jpg
https://oi60.tinypic.com/htb3f6.jpg
https://oi58.tinypic.com/5x0ozs.jpg
https://oi61.tinypic.com/fwm5qo.jpg
Now maybe you see some sort of "league" but all I know is these women all could get with better looking guys, yet gave me a chance. None of them worked out, but that's the point, I got to find out. Which is what you should be doing.
You're so worried about whether there's any attraction there that you miss the whole concept of building attraction to begin with. I'm not a very good looking guy, so I don't bother looking for women that are going to say yes when I haven't even said a word yet- it would be very slim pickings. I have to BUILD that attraction. Just about every guy out there does unless they are drop dead gorgeous like Mr. Tatum.
Stop worrying about "Who will say yes" because by the time you get to that point, you should already have built up some rapport with the woman. Look for more along the lines of "Who looks like they would be willing to have a conversation?" That means stuff like the person doesn't look too busy or preoccupied, doesn't look like her dog just died, and bonus points for ones that are looking over at you and flashing a smile because that's like a strobe light of attention grabbing. That will require you to look up and make eye contact now and again though, which isn't the end of the world. Just smile a bit while doing it. Don't death glare some chick when she looks over at you.
Nah, stop saying can't. You choose not to. And just like that- there's nothing creepy about your profile pic, at all. Nothing. This is all in your head man, all of it. Look at me. Look at you. It's not even a question. If I can, you can.
That's like looking at a bike and going "I CAN'T ride a bike, I can't" ... because you never rode a bike before- LEARN. PRACTICE. It doesn't just fall out of the sky and hit you on the head.
Maybe get a job in retail for a little bit. Not even for the money. It forces you to talk to strangers and was a pretty big help to me. Just do so with a POSITIVE attitude. Not "I can't do this" but rather "I will find a way to do this". Don't be so defeatist, it's unbecoming.
So there you go, apply it. Approach, warm smile, "Hey, how's it going?"
You can get creative with it and try doing things on the fly, but that takes a bit more practice. Best bet is to just take a seat, having a basic idea of how you want to start off the conversation, and not being afraid to politely break away if things seem to be going bad.
For instance, on occasion I'll do that approach, if she gives a short response positive I'll give a go like "Ah, good to hear. What are you up to right now?" and this is the tricky part where you have to think on your feet a bit. A positive response you simply work with, keep asking questions, good to go. A negative response (The worst I've gotten is a simple "Why?") usually you need to have a go to response to avoid embarrassment because you've barked up the wrong tree. I usually would say something like "I wanted to make sure I wasn't interrupting something important right now. I was just wondering if you could help me out." and from
there you go with whatever pre thoughtup excuse you were going with. Sometimes for me it's something simple like, I'm looking to get to so and so but my phone is dead (you shouldn't have used your phone in front of her anyway so that's a fine excuse), could you help me out. Keep it simple with that one. (Keep your phone on vibrate, on the very off chance your phone were to go off you would look like the BIGGEST asshat).
But truly, that excuse is for the exceptional situation, not what usually happens. Usually what happens is you say "Hey, how's it going?" She's give you something lukewarm probably, maybe a little better if she's in a good mood, and you'll have to do a little effort there by asking what she's up to. If she's being short, keep trying with the open ended questions that aren't intrusive but as long as you come off genuine she will let her guard down fairly quick to the innocent questions.
Ask questions about whatever she is working on, even if she says something as simple as "I'm just studying for class", you go "What class are you studying for?" or if she says "I'm just about to get ready to head off to work" then ask her what she does and such (this also might be an excuse to brush you off if she seems short and disengaged though, so watch the body language).
You should already be able to spot the signs since you worked retail long enough. Just use that to read the situation and keep asking THEM questions. The whole idea is to keep her talking. It will get her comfortable with you when she sees that you are LISTENING to her by asking follow up questions. Don't check her out or zone out, listen, pick up clues, ask follow up questions. Keep HER talking. Eventually at some point, when she starts getting comfortable, she will ask YOU a question. Right there, winner winner chicken dinner, you're many steps closer in the right direction.
Then finally try to be the one to end the conversation. Unless you both know neither of you have anywhere to be (both waiting for a class to start). It makes you seem more in control, which for some reason, just seems to work don't ask me why. Ending the conversation first just seems to add to the allure that is you. Works every time for me. I tell her, "Well hey look, I've got to get going, but let's grab coffee sometime?" and honestly, if you've gotten to this point, a yes is almost a forgone conclusion. You already did the hard parts by the time you've actually asked her out on a coffee date. The only time I've gotten to this point and had it NOT end in a date is when they drop the "Aw, that's sweet but I'm actually in a relationships" (I've yet to see one that wasn't legitimately in a relationship either though, so it usually isn't just some excuse).
Look, you can think you want about all this I'm writing. But it works, from experience.
Sure they have, you just haven't noticed. Most women aren't going to blatantly show you they are interested on principle. Look at all the women on here that post questions like "I've never talked to my crush before but I feel like he doesn't even notice me, or it seems like he actively ignores me. Is he not attracted to me?" and they just give up. I guarantee, at some point, YOU have been that guy. I'm certain of it. Whether you believe it or not. You are the only thing standing in your way when it comes to women, the ONLY thing. Open your mind up enough to realize when you're wrong. This is one of those times. You're basing your entire view of women and romance on false premises. "I can't do this" or "Women aren't interested in me and never have been" "They will think I'm a creep" etc. etc. these are all falsehoods that you've come up with in your own mind to avoid rejection and taking risks.
I've been here a long time, and I've seen you around here a long time, and what I can
say is that you've been living with this negativity long enough. It's gotten you no where, am I right? This whole defeatist attitude hasn't gotten you any closer to what you want, and don't tell me you don't want a relationship because you do. Don't tell me you don't want a woman because we both know you do. But you've looked for every possible reasoning for why women "don't like you" accept for the most obvious one- you're not trying. It's not you height, no matter how long you've been saying it is (and it's been a while), it's not your smile, it's not your looks, it's none of that.
It's your attitude and your unwillingness to get out of your own way. I don't know exactly what part of it you're scared of, but I think it's time you dealt with it because you've hit a stagnation point. Where you are, there's no where to go. It'll just be more of the same so long as you continue to accept your preconceived notions about yourself.
I once had a string where I asked out 9 women in a ROW who were not available. Can't let that stuff deter you. I'm not even exaggerating, over the course of a couple months, 9 women in a row. Easy come, easy go, simply keep trying.
It's doesn't work that way. Sure, there are going to be some women who want something you're not and you're dead on arrival, but most of them- the vast majority, it's about what you DO and how you do it. I don't get dates because I look good or have money or have a fancy job or a kick ass car or a rocking body (I have none of those by the way haha), it's what I DO and how I do it.
The women you don't approach, the ones that look busy or in a hurry. The ones you approach are the ones you're attracted to and don't look cold/closed off. Women aren't preset things that you can gauge without talking to. They are human beings and they all have preferences. I met one girl, absolute bombshell, every guy was trying to get with her and she wasn't having it, yet for some reason she took a big interest in me (Actually the reason I ended up on this site, I was baffled and needed advice on why someone like that would be interested). It was what I DID and how I did it. That's it.
It really isn't. At all. Maybe in like high school it might have been, but how is saying "hey, how are you?" social suicide?
What? That's not how it works at all. Jesus, what women have you been talking to? I have never met a woman who has said that, ever. Not even the bitchy ones (they might think "this poor dumbass actually thought he had a chance" and blow you off, but perv or creepy? Nah). I think you should make that a question just so you can get some outside confirmation from women- actually. I'm going to do it for you and show you =P Hold on.
THAT'S THE POINT! hahaha women respect guys that are straight forward and not trying to think they are shy. Women don't like being treated like they are dumb. They respect a guy that is confident enough to be honest with that sort of thing without being blunt about it in a disrespectful way.
sly* not shy. Women don't like guys who think they are doing some sly shit and not being honest with their intentions.
It's only uncomfortable if you MAKE it uncomfortable. I have at times heard the dreaded "Thanks but I'm not interested" (back before I was able to read the signals and avoid asking somebody out that wasn't interest), and as long as you go "Oh okay" and shake it off with a smile and don't suddenly get awkward, then it isn't. Been there, done that, learned my lesson. Don't make it awkward and it isn't. (And on one occasion, the woman later said she thought that was impressive and kind of attractive, I shit you not. The mere fact I so easily brushed over rejection is what caught her attention. Happens.)
I've had plenty of success. I've had plenty of failure too. That's how progress works. Failure, learn, succeed. Rinse, repeat. Never fail, never learn, never really succeed.
Seeing them answers?
Nah it's not different location. You're just being stubborn and refuse to believe you're wrong on this haha =P I told you from first hand experience, these women are telling you from their perspective, this is just how the way the world works. For whatever reason, you see something that doesn't exist.
"Any girl that thinks that is creepy is creepy herself" this is so true.
And I guaranteeeeee that you don't know girls there don't want you approaching them because it is 100% clear you NEVER do. So you couldn't possibly know that. As much as you hate to accept it, there's nothing physically wrong with you. You're psyching yourself out, plain and simple.
There's no difference. Warm smile, "Hey how's it going?" followed up by a "what are you up to?" in a kind genuine voice, and then just let the casual conversation flow. Anybody who reacts negatively to that IS the weirdo.
Sure you can, you choose not to. My experience says there's nothing wrong with it. Real women on here have said there's nothing wrong with it. There's nothing wrong with it. You are just telling yourself that, but your wrong. I don't mean that in an insulting way, it's just a matter of fact; you're wrong. If you do it in that exact way, you did nothing wrong and it will not end badly. If it does, that person is a freak and you dodged a bullet.
I DARE you to approach 5 women the way I just said in my last response. 1. Introduce 2. Ask what they are up to 3. work with the answers you are given to continue asking questions. 4. After a bit of time end the conversation and ask them to coffee sometime. Do that with a smile, be genuine, and don't be overtly flirty or sexual. You will be fine EVEN IF she isn't even remotely physically attracted to you.
Bullshit, you don't have the confidence to make the moves, that's it. You cockblock yourself, it's obvious. Do that 5 times, you'll get a coffee date at least once I'm betting, unless you are unlucky enough to ask out mostly unavailable women. But do it, get the coffee date, then come back here and you move to the next step. Going from coffee date to REAL date. A guy that doesn't have the confidence to take things from coffee date to real date ends up as just a friend, because of his own doing. Women aren't going to just throw themselves at you, you have to go through the motions and make the first move. Key is knowing when and how. What I am telling you is the first step. The introduction and making plans for beyond the introduction.
What do you get out of telling yourself you can't?
It's clearly NOT the truth though. I don't know how else to possibly prove it to you. It's like if I bought a soccer ball from the store and told you "hey look I bought a soccer ball at the local sporting good store" and you were like "They don't sell soccer balls". Then I directed you to the site SHOWING soccer balls. I called the store with an associate confirming they sell soccer balls for you to listen in on. But then you still go "I can't buy a soccer ball there". You just don't want a soccer ball, so you are choosing not to go get one. It's that simple.
No matter how many times you tell yourself that it doesn't make it true. The ONLY thing women are going to reject you on is your attitude. That is it. You change your attitude, you change your situation. That simple. I did it. I know you can. You choose not to. That's up to you.
You choose not to talk to them. You choose not to take any chance. You choose to convince yourself of a reality that isn't true. That's choice, and yours alone.
Yes it will!
It wasn't like it was always like that. But I changed. You have to do the same if you want things to change.
Not true. Everybody can change.
Again, not true. One day things will happen and you'll see it. In my case a bunch of really bad things forced it, so hope you don't have to go through that, but you'll see.
Everyone can change in whatever way they choose. Just takes time and effort.
Got ZERO to do with looks and you know it.
We have been over this. Look at me. Look at you. Attraction is a ton more than looks.
I have never, in my life, EVER gotten a date from online dating. I have only ever gotten like 3 responses and I've tried numerous sites multiple times. Online dating will DESTROY your self esteem if you use it. It's fucking terrible, never use online dating ever again.
Real life dating is SOOO much easier than online bullshit it's not even fair. Seriously.
But look, do it, don't do it. Change, don't change. It's up to you. It's a choice. I get you're not going to, but it's not because you can't, that part is bullshit. You choose not to. If you never try, you never have to fail, but the end result is the same: alone and reinforcing the negativity. It's not worth it. But hey, I'll let you figure that out first hand.
Alright man, your choice.
Opinion
8Opinion
I think the profile pic one is good in a genuine situation, like if the girl said something funny, it is apretty big smile but it's not unattractive. I also think the second one is pretty handsome, but could look unnatural in a situation where you should be smiling like your profile pic. Hope that makes sense.
i like both, but the profile picture more as its more genuine.
Ah well. He's like me. Genetically coded to only go for girls who hit on us first lmao.
I do :) It shows they're brave AND like me a lot. But they have to be jooooooooooooooooooooocy.
I honestly think pretty much every one has an attractive smile.
The only time a smile appears ugly is if you have
horrible teeth.
Example: Teeth missing, yellow, OR decayed/rotten.
What a killer smile you have :) both your profile pic and posted pic shows good and natural.. don't be too conscious about it.. you're attractive.. Are you a Kurdish?
if they smile back, its attractive.
less gum looks better. you can never go wrong with that one. but i like the huge cheesing too. its adorable and it makes me happy.
I like both your smiles but I think in general people look more attractive when they smile like in your prof picture because you seem genuinely happy and that makes any person more attractive :)
I don't know. My parents and grandparents always say that I have a great smile but they're my family members. They would never say it's ugly even if it was.
Love the 2nd one but your profile pic makes me smile because it so cheesy and delightful. You became a child there lol
u Less gun is always better, yeah. But you have a good smile either way and you're quite attractive so go out and get those girls!
Less gum is what I meant lol.
Keep trying!!
nobody on earth has an ugly smile. all smiles are beautiful in my opinion.
but you've got a good smile.
Even this one
img3.wikia.nocookie.net/.../Ugly-smile.jpg
i think your smile is fine. you can tell if a smile is genuine, and it looks a little less genuine in the photo you attached. your profile picture looks like you're happier. :-)
I like your smile! ! It matches your face, smile is contagious
You have nothing to worry about! Your smile is really nice!
Your profile pic looks more real. Your second pic it looks forced.
Less gum is better but the one with gum isn't hideous just a bit too enthusiastic! Lol this isn't a dentists inspection;)
I actually like your smile on your avi better. Looks more genuine and friendly. On the other pic it looks a bit forced. But you have a nice smile.
I feel the exact same way. But both your smiles look great! No worries.
I tend to prefer "less gum" smiles I suppose. XD But you have a nice smile and nice teeth! :3 And you're handsome too! X3
Easy look in the mirror and smile. If it doesn't break then you are probably ok.
That is correct. Less gum is win.
Dude, you are hot. I don't understand why you aren't currently balls deep inside some jooooooooooocy Tdot girl.
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