Is it weird that I am affectionate with my teddy bear?

[Anonymous]

I have been feeling really down, stressed, and emotionally exhausted lately, for which I am getting therapy. A few days ago, because it was affecting my sleep and I just really wanted someone to cuddle, I decided to take a teddy bear from the basement, and now I am just really affectionate with it at night and talk to it and rub my nose against it and give it kisses. Really, I am referring to "it" as "her".

Also, not in a sexual way, but I often sleep naked with her but that's just because it's more comfortable for me, as the second clause suggests, and she only takes up my chest and stomach area at the most.

The intent isn't sexual at all, of course. She just makes me feel great and relieved and is a very effective emotional blanket for me that I love to cuddle with. I actually miss her a little bit throughout the day when I am not sleeping and am even more reluctant to get out of bed now?

Weird?

Updates

+1 y

Reminds me of Annie and Robbers from LoL.

Updates

+1 y

Tibbers

Auto correct...

[bunnyy]

I'm like that too... but with my boyfriend and cat when I get to sleep with my boyfriend I am so cozy I hate getting out of bed. Same with my cat and when she wakes up she starts purring and she's so warm uhhgg it sucks especially when I have work early, all I think about is how comfy I was in bed. Maybe just get a pet instead of the teddy that way it's more normal and you will actually get affection back! My cat wakes me up sometimes by touching her nose to mine it's so cute and it makes me feel really loved first thing in the morning! Plus listening to her heartbeat and purr is soothing when my boyfriend can't stay over and I'm home alone at least I have my cat Luna!

[rawrityrawrrawr]

Not weird. I'm like that too. I have a bear that I have had for 2 years. I've become really attached to it. I have found that now with bad depression, the attachment gets stronger. and you're probably thinking something like this "it's there when i go to sleep and it doesn't leave no matter what i tell it" I think that is why we feel so close to the bears because they dont leave and they are there no matter what. we also probably have this attachment because we dont want the pain of real people. it's something nice to cuddle with and you only get the good out of it. I think that it's cute and fuck what other people say. if it makes you happy, then do it.

[Asker]

Exactly. That's exactly it. I heard a few women saying it would be a dealbreaker or a red flag, But I don't care because I don't want to date someone that even has such a significant regard for something so mundane.

[rawrityrawrrawr]

exactly. im not gona lie. th0se girls are bitches

[rawrityrawrrawr]

if you wanted.. maybe message me sometime on here :)

[Asker]

Sure...;)

[rawrityrawrrawr]

haha okie lovie! talk to you then :)

[mizzmox]

Nah not weird at all.
I've always loved my stuff animals ever since I was a kid. I have names for every single one of them lol. Then as I got older they became great cuddle buddies and acted like pillows lol. Its sort of like a comfort thing for me. Recently I got diagnosed with IBS, a digestive disorder, and when I had full blown attacks I would cuddle the crap outta my stuff dinosaur named Lucy. So no it's not weird, at least to me. Now when things get sexual THATS when youve gotta problem. Other than that cuddle away!

[itsme_goodsamaritan]

No, not weird... but very sweet! :) I looooove me teddy too. I look into his eyes every day and feel sooo good, it instantly calms me down... My guardian angel really XD :* :*

[Asker]

Same... and as a result, I just don't want to get out of bed anymore in the mornings...:/

I love holding her and snuggling with her and running my hands through her fur... her fur keeps Mr warm too... I feel so good and actually love sleeping these days as a result...

[itsme_goodsamaritan]

Thanks for MH and hugs 'n kisses to your cute teddy :)

[Asker]

Thank you for being one of the non-judgmental people.

[Pink2000]

He just wants someone to agree with him and justify that sleeping with a teddy bear is ok there's nothing really wrong with it I just think it's weird.

[Asker]

@Pink2000

I don't think there's anything wrong with thinking it's "weird", but as I said, it's the people who are actually treating it as if its some sort of severe issue and saying that they'd INSTANTLY disqualify a dating prospect on the basis of it.

[Pink2000]

He's the one who asked if it was "weird'" read the question title

[WhoisntBi]

No not at all especially if you've had it for a long time. We are given them as children & grow up with them. They comfort is when we are young an we get emotionally attached to them & many memories are linked with them so it's perfectly natural for you to go back to them after a shitty day or something. It's also just nice to hold things that are soft & have contact with something else but be careful not to et too reliant in her as you mightn't be able to go back & end up needing more therapy haha

[meatballs21]

It's a little weird. Men are after all supposed to lie in bed being hairy and just grunt in a masculine fashion.

Seriously, it's a bit unusual but if it's helping you then it's not really a big deal.

[Aliciaissocool]

This is kind of like me but at the same time it’s not. It’s kind of embarrassing to say but my bear is like a bit smaller than me , but he’s like a human (I’m im referring it to he)

it was last year September I decided to “act” out scenarios of being inlove and my bear was a character (not saying because it’s embarrassed lmao) and ever since then I’ve seen him as a person to me.

let’s say im watching a horror film, i always say “im going to be scared when I go to sleep “ and then I look at my bear and I act like he’s comforting me. And I never worry about anything because he’s like a person to me and im inlove with him, in my mind. Im single af and I’ve never felt an attraction to anyone except for this stupid bear

not in a sexual way, I just really really am attached to him and if im having a sleepover he’s always with me. I talk to him and he talks back to me and it’s just a normal thing to me now, I can’t imagine sleeping without him. Even on holidays, when im on a plane I can’t bring this massive bear so in hotels or something I hug my pillow like it’s my bear, or I hug one of my smaller round plushies and I act like it’s a head that I’m hugging.

ik this is kinda stupid but I don’t think there’s a big problem with it, though it is quite upsetting when you think about it and they aren’t real.

[Anonymous]

I think its okay, its sweet.
but wouldn't u rather get an animal, like a cat, they love sleeping, so the wouldn't be a problem,
then the animal could feel loved by u, and the animal would definitely love u back.
And, I just wanna say, Gods there, his there to listen to u, He knows everything about you, he cares, God died for ur sins, ur transgressions, and he wants u to be happy. So, do u love the Lord? Remember, he'll ALWAYS be there for u, no matter what, he only wants u to be happy, even though we go through tough times, he's there to help us though it.

[maroonbro]

Well it's okay, you have to keep it a secret tho. I mean all horror films start out like this, you don't want to grow up to being a 20 year old who invites a girl over to have sex and kill her and tell the teddy made you do it. Especially since the bear is a girl you will find her persuasive just like any other human girl. Remember to always be in charge, be the husband, not the dad

[Souma95]

there's nothing wrong with having a sentimental attachment to something, blanky, teddy ect.. it comforts you. I have a teddy, and when I'm sad or mad I still hug him :')

[Asker]

I can't keep my hands off her. lol

Her fur just feels so great against my skin. She's infinitely soothing and consoling.

[Souma95]

Hey, long as she makes you happy right ;)

[findingdreamland]

Not weird. It makes you comfortable and relax. Then enjoy it.
But you know you have to share your feelings with a *real someone * you know. A teddy bear is teddy bear. She can not talk or communicate.
If you have some brother sister or a close friend , talk with them. We all need human intimacy.

[Asker]

Yeah, I started going to a therapist this week.

I am really starting to love and get attached to my teddy though. She's so soft and abundantly consoling for me. Nothing better than having her in my bed with me in my arms or on top of my chest after an exhausting day.

I know, this is quite peculiar.

I think part of it is that I almost never slept with a stuffed animal before in my childhood. Some may floccinaucinihilipilificate it because they slept with one a lot in their childhood and then stopped for whatever reason.

[Asker]

Like I get goosebumps sometimes as a result.

[findingdreamland]

That is a good start going to therapist. Only thing I can say, there is nothing wrong to hug a teddy bear. But real love is much more warm. Because you can give and take. More interaction. You like this way maybe more because there is no rejection. But we need rejections / sadness too, to find the real happiness. Life is about falling down, and going up, happiness, sadness.

Keep your teddy bear at the moment and continue to your sessions. Your attachment will disappear day by day.

[Asker]

Rejection isn't the problem (however getting heartbroken is a fear of mine even though I never have been); rather it's just that I am fundamentally unable to talk to girls. I am so bad I can't even get friendzoned. Butlike I said, I am up for a girlfriend and would love to have one.

I know real love is obviously going to be much more powerful.

Regardless, I don't want to give up my teddy bear, single or not. She has a place in my heart now, which isn't uncommon. Many people get attached to inanimate objects.

[findingdreamland]

I know how it feels. Been there. But I still survive. Heart broken is bad, but it is a risk you have to take if you want to be loved.

I like your teddy bear affection :) There is nothing wrong. You don't harm people or sth. No worries.

[Asker]

I honesy don't know if there risk is worth the reward. Most people tend to floccinaucinihilipilificate the risk. I do the opposite. The problem is that the risk is actually almost more of a guarantee.

Also, hearing about GIGS ruined it for me. Because the relationship can be conducted near perfectly, and still GIGS is quite likely, especially for couples in which one involved is under 25.

Then again, I don't want to wait until 25 if I don't have to. 25+ isn't really heartbreak-free land either.

I don't know. I am just really conflicted and will be talking to my therapist about this.

The symptoms of heartbreak are just so severe. Hearing people...

It's even more devastating to see those who bash even people who have been hurt before for being afraid of getting hurt, and this whole mentality especially in the US that anything that hurts is good and people telling others that "[they] will get hheartbroken many times" and to "get used to it".

[Asker]

I am afraid of getting heartbroken once. I might just BARELY be able to get over that, but 2, 3, 4, 5, n times?

Yeah... no...

But I won't annoy you anymore because nothing you say will change anything. I am just agonizingly waiting for my next therapy session.

Now you see why I have requested therapy.

[Asker]

The symptoms of heartbreak are severe AND have the capacity to last for extremely long periods of time (years). That's even worse. Add the fact that I get attached to things and people very easily and strongly.

This is a catastrophic risk for me to be taking.

[Asker]

Teddy is the only "thing" keeping me somewhat sane right now.

[LastGirlScout]

Ok, its quite obvious your replacing your desire for a woman onto this bear. Although its making you feel better, I think the emotional attachment is going too far. Your desire to stay in bed with it and basically ignoring the world and your problems isn't healthy. I'd suggest keep at the councilling and try and remember your bear is not a real companion.

[Asker]

I am not ignoring my problems as a result. It is only a temporary relief.

[Asker]

I am in therapy.

[LastGirlScout]

Good, stick at it I think you have some way to go yet. We all need a good hug sometimes but try not to get emotionally involved with a soft toy.

[Anonymous]

Teddy bears can be as aluve as you want it to me. I have a teddy bear and I refer to it as her. She's my best friend, the one that always gonna be there for me when no one else is. I have her for 8 years already. I'm 18 now. I cuddke her to skeep everynight. Yes I give her kisses all the same and rub my face on her :) If I'm out for a long time I miss her. Before I go to school everyday I give her goodbye kisses and say bye to her.

It's normal to feel affectionate with soneone who treats you nicely and always be there for you. It is NOT weird at all. Also, I remember her birthday I buy her little presents :) You're not weird :)

[Opinion Owner]

alive* be* cuddle* sleep* Damn I hate these typos lol.

[kheserthorpe]

Only if you turn teddy to face the wall when you are going to do something you shouldn't.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like you need a girl.

You're taking your teddy as a romantic partner; these things you do with a GIRL. Girl is more than just a sex object.

Cause unlike men, girls are not supportive to men who need a girl (they are 'weird', 'creepy' etc... etc... etc...), we have to makedo with other things. The girls go for the good looking guys with many girlfriends who cheat on them; then they complaint guys are bad and they cheat.

And actually we need a girl more than girls need us. Cause we have to show the world that we're guys. We need to show the world that we're tough. We revel our soft side to our girl.

[dipta]

You turned the teddy bear affection question into something else entirely.
"unlike men, girls are not supportive to men who need a girl", what is that suppose to mean?

[Opinion Owner]

That basically means if you see a guy hitting girls and he hits on you, you'll reject him. Although you can clearly see he's single and he wants a GF. The more you see a guy trying, the more you're likely to reject him cause he (for some reason) becomes 'weird' and has 'something wrong'. So girls are NOT supportive to the guy.

Guys on the other hand like it if a girl is in desperate need for a BF. They're very supportive.

[HokkaidoWolf]

I have sex with my teddy bear all the time. Mr. FuzzleMeUp never lets me down at night. Making sweet love till the morning!

[Asker]

lol why the downvotes?

[Anonymous]

missing your teddy bear entails a level of emotional attachment. that is a bit odd to me. it'd be even weirder if you opted out on an actual girl to be with your bear. on the other hand, i am cudding with my bear right now. actually, she is a lamb. she's cute. but i don't miss her. i will probably buy a new one when i forget where i placed her.

is THAT weird? ;P

[Asker]

I am not "opting out" on anyone. Though I have simply been unable to get any dates or even get "friendzoned" (that's how bad I am) despite trying quite a few times and still willing to try. But no, I wouldn't opt out on an actual girl to "be with my bear" lol.

Though in regards to emotional attachment, yes I do have some level of emotional attachment to her [the teddy bear]. My sister wanted it back (well, she wasn't using it and said I could have it and never used it in the first place) saying that it's the best teddy bear we have and she was threatening to because she said technically it's hers, and I begged her not to take it from me because I am attached to her [the teddy bear] and in a way, it's analogous to being my blankie (and also the fact that I slept naked with it so she probably doesn't want it). I offered her an alternative stuffed animal we had downstairs and she accepted it, thankfully. lol

[Asker]

To me, it's a little "weird" that you DON'T get attached. lol

[Opinion Owner]

to me, the bear is just a tool used for physical comfort. my emotions don't get attached after a cuddle or two. i get emotional in human interactions, but not with inanimate objects without sentimental value; meaning, it wasn't a gift given to me by my grandmother before she passed away, for example. i bought it (my lamb) purely to have something soft to squish and nothing more. to each their own i suppose, so long as it doesn't affect our regular lives in a negative way. :)

[Seiran0807]

I think that it's normal, and have felt that way myself when feeling vulnerable. A quote taken from a psychology study resonated with me:

"A child, she wrote, may take "an imaginary animal as his intimate and beloved companion; subsequently he is never separated from his animal friend. This animal offers the child what he is searching for: faithful love and unswerving devotion. The two share everything, good and bad experiences, and complete understanding of each other; either speech is not necessary, or they have a secret language; the understanding between them goes beyond the realm of consciousness." - Dorothy Burlingham

[renogaza]

its really cute! i do that too with my pillow too :3 (i keep my plushies in a corner since i dont like how they look at night xD - too much "five nights at freddy's" lol) and although most guys would never admit it i imagine many of them do as well, its nothing to be ashamed of :)

[BeInnovative]

I was like who the fuck is Annie and Robbers? Isn't it Tibbers then i saw the update...
do you also use ur ult to make ur own tibbers a big one to kill others?
if so u r a terrible person.

but it is okay i am affectionate with my own teddy bear too. just hugging-wise. for other purposes i am very affectionate with my vibrator thou.

happy days playing LoL! dont overthink of your love to Tibbers.

[Anonymous]

depending on your age you have to let go at some point.
Try putting her away for a little bit and try to keep busy with other things.
good luck with it bro!
Try finding a close friend or a female companion. Slowly try to get a girlfriend or something. girls love cuddles bro!

[Asker]

What's so bad about sleeping with a teddy bear? And I have been trying to get a girlfriend but have been unsuccessful.

[Asker]

And I am keeping busy with othe things.

[Opinion Owner]

thats great man keeping busy is always good,
nothing is wrong with it when you are young and i mean 12 years old is the limit. I was forced to stop sleeping with my teddy bear at that age. I needed it because it was the last thing my dad got for me before he passed away i was 5 when i got it.
I get being attached to something that comforts you. But its not real, and eventually you will have to move on. good luck i know its hard

[Bandit74]

You were borderline weird by the end of the first paragraph, you crossed the line after the second.

Wierd, yes
Bad, no

If you and teddy decide to take things to the next level, make sure you get consent first and always "wrap it before you tap it"

[KBob93]

He'll get fuzzies on his weenie!

[crazyemster]

Of course not if it helps you feel better then go for it. :) Teddy bears are cute and cuddly... who doesn't love them?

[Marstalk]

Needing something to help emotionally is not necessarily a bad thing. I though make sure you do not get overly attached to it/her. You might also see if your school counselors can recommend someone to talk to. Just to help with learning to manage your stress and emotional exhaustion.

[Asker]

Is it bad to get overly attached to her?

There's a quote:
"Your woman will divorce you for a richer man. Your girlfriend will leave you for the fool with the bad boy attitude. But that teddy you forgot during your teenage years will still be waiting for you to dust him off and give a cuddle."
~PuroCallum, Bodybuilding

[Marstalk]

It can be if it is the only thing that you can use for emotional support. Also do not always go with people's quotes some are just horrible advice.

[Asker]

This quote actually makes sense though.

Anyhow, I just started therapy, once a week, this week, so that will be of consolation as well.

[Asker]

And I am seeing the school psychologist once per week.

[Marstalk]

Yes it makes sense. I did not deny that I just think quotes like these are horrid. They give the implication that these will happen and also it is not to respectful of women to be honest.

[Asker]

1. The risk IS critically high in this day and age (and don't give me a speech on it being "a part of life" because people have tried countless times and this is in part why I have just started therapy.)
2. I'd agree and understand if a woman said a similar thing about men. The original quote may have a misogynistic attitude; for me, it doesn't have anything to do with gender. I feel bad for women too and understand their pain too whenever they get led on, dumped for someone else, or cheated on.

[lumos]

You seem to be a bit too attached to that teddy since you actually miss it throughout the day and since you feel more reluctant to get out of bed. Not good.

[LastGirlScout]

Weird a what it is, I'm even more concerned by the three male down votes!

[lumos]

@LastGirlScout maybe they're too attached to their teddies too :P

[Asker]

How is that not good? (And actually I don't miss it throughout the day.)

[lumos]

It's not good to become that dependent on an inanimate object.
"I actually miss her a little bit throughout the day when I am not sleeping"

[Asker]

Yeah, no I don't anymore. That was just the beginning couple days lol.

[lumos]

And you don't feel reluctant to get out of bed anymore?

[Asker]

That I do, because it feels good to cuddle with her. But is that really so bad?

[lumos]

Yep.

[Asker]

Well, I don't think so.

[lumos]

Alrighty.

[kambo_trick3y]

Could be worse, you could be like this guy.

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